


Run To You

by Twitterbug69



Series: Run To You [1]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-09
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-02-29 01:33:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 80,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18768490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twitterbug69/pseuds/Twitterbug69
Summary: Buck was the one married to the abusive Doug , a year ago he ran away from him and joined the LAFD. Now that he finally has a spot on the team and feels like life is going his way things get turned upside down. His sister tracks him down , he's dealing with his attraction to the new recruit Eddie Diaz while none of the team knows he's gay and the leftover feelings of inadequacy from Doug. But worse than that Doug has tracked him down , can he live life normally while hoping Doug doesn't show up and live with never having a chance with Eddie or will he break under all the pressure?





	1. Hot Tempers And Unexploded Bombs

One year , he had made it one year on his own. Things had been crazy when he left Pennsylvania. He and Doug had been married right after high school , his family not really approving of his marriage had stayed away for the most part. At first it had hurt but when it became apparent that Doug wasn’t going to stop hitting him he was thankful. He still can’t believe he ever got the courage to sneak away , running across the country as fast as he could or that Doug hasn’t found him yet.

He had been worried about all the interviews after the rollercoaster incident , but after two months and no Doug he figured he was safe. He knew that Bobby had his suspicions about some of the things he said or did , but so far no one had said anything to him about his odd reactions. He had tried to move on since he got here , but there was only a few women he had managed to sleep with , one he nearly got fired for.

Abby had been more than his girlfriend , she had been his best friend. The one that he told he was gay , that he had a husband , but things had gone south and he had to escape. He didn’t hold it against her that she had to get away. He understood it better than anyone , didn’t matter that she was running from memories and feelings instead of a person. The guys at work gave him grief about it , but he ignored it for the most part. Sometimes he still had moments of insecurity , feeling worthless and unwanted that carried over from his life with Doug.

“Guess who got another DXA scan and dropped another half a percent?” Buck bragged as he walked up to Bobby and Hen.

“What are you talking about?” Hen asked.

“It measures your body fat.” Buck explained , he was proud of the work he had put into his body. Doug had told him not to work out , that he had no one to show off for unless he was cheating.

“Does that mean it measures the fat in your head?” Chim asked as he walked up.

“That would be so funny if we weren’t a week away from the submissions being due for the Hot Days , Smoldering Nights Men of the LAFD wall calendar and I’ve reached my goal weight. Seems like my head is working perfectly.” Buck tried to ignore the pang at Chim’s words.

“Do you really have to use that whole sexist title , can’t you just say ‘The sexist testosterone filled smut that perpetuates the idiotic , outdated notion that all firefighters are both hot and male.’?” Hen spit out.

“That’s not any shorter.”

“Come on it’s for Charity Hen.” Bobby smiled.

“Not you too?!”

“Hey they say a man is at his sexiest when he reaches fifty.”

“Oh is it really , they really say that.” Hen looked at him in disbelief.

“You’re all wrong. What we really need is an Asian sensation. It’s our time.”

“I think it’s great you both are trying out .”

“Oh cause you think we don’t have a chance at all right?” Bobby looked at him in disbelief.

“No I didn’t say that…I…well they are only choosing one person from each station…I mean.” Buck stuttered , fighting the instinct to duck his head at the clear indication that Bobby wasn’t happy with him.

“Oh that is a beautiful man.” Chim said pointing behind Buck.

“You ain’t lying and I like girls.” Hen smirked.

Buck turned around to see who they were talking about and damn if they weren’t right. He was lean and muscled , a light smattering of hair on his chest and stubble on his face. He was putting his shirt on and to Buck it seemed as though it was going in slow motion. He was so screwed , this guy was exactly his type. But as a new recruit it made Buck feel inadequate.

“Who the hell is that?”

“That is Eddie Diaz , just graduated top of his class and we snagged him away from station 6.” Bobby sounded smug , he had a rivalry going with them.

“What do we need him for?” Buck asked under his breath , but they still heard him , Chim and Hen laughing at him.

“He served multiple tours in Afghanistan as an army medic , got a silver star to prove it. He’s not a newbie for sure. Come I’ll introduce you. You can call him eight pack.” Bobby teased him.

“Wow a silver star , damn.” Hen said in awe.

“Better drop some more body fat there Butch.” Chim patted his abs as he walked past to join Bobby and Hen.

Buck felt his heart drop at that , that was a phrase way too close to what Doug used to tell him. He had basically outlawed Buck from working out yet would constantly taunt him about needing to lose weight. Logically he knew that Chim had been only teasing , but it still made his heart race and his breath come short. He stared at his team meeting this new guy , Eddie , for a moment before he couldn’t take the emotions anymore and went to calm down in the opposite direction. Telling himself that he was still needed , that Chim didn’t mean it the way Doug always did and really that he wasn’t the person that was married to Doug.

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Buck hid until they got a call , then because he was last in the truck he got the seat right across from the new guy. He tried to look him over without letting him know he was checking him out. No one here knew he was gay , not that he figured they’d have a problem since Hen was cool , but he wasn’t taking any chances.

“So a silver star huh , what did you do save a platoon or something?” Chim asked.

“No uh a convoy actually.” Eddie seemed embarrassed at the attention.

“So have you heard about the hot firefighter calendar?” Hen piped up.

“I’m sorry the what?”

Buck looked at Hen in disbelief , wasn’t she just giving them grief about how it was sexist and stupid. Now here she was trying get the new guy into his calendar shoot. This was his thing , he wanted to win this so he could prove that he was good at something. Rationally he knew that it was stupid , but post Doug he hadn’t really done anything other than become a firefighter and the good feelings were wearing off from that accomplishment.

“It’s for charity!” Hen smiled at Buck while Bobby laughed at her.

“So is your full name Eduardo?” Buck asked.

“No.” was all he got , like the guy didn’t like him.

“Anyone ever just call you Diaz?” Buck tried again.

“Not if they want me to respond.” Again without a smile.

“Look something’s gotta give we got a Cap , Chim , Hen , Buck…we can’t just call you Eddie.” Buck tried again.

“I can’t tell if he’s being serious or not. “ Eddie turned toward Hen and Chim.

“I like to always operate on the assumption that nothing he says is serious.” Chim smirked at him.

Buck felt his heart break a little when everyone laughed at Chim. Was that really how they saw him , as the idiot who couldn’t be serious at all? Sure since he had left Doug he had tried to be more carefree , after living for five years in fear of everything he said or did he figured he deserved a little freedom. Now though he wondered if he hadn’t been a little too free if this was how his ‘friends’ saw him. He kept his mouth shut for the rest of the ride and his eyes out the window , trying to keep them too busy to tear up.

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Once they got on scene he reigned in his emotions and focused on the emergency , this was his element. He always did this right and no one was better at his job than him. He pushed the new recruit out of his thoughts and focused his attention on the patient.

“It’s a hundred pounds per square inch pumped through his entire body. “ he told them as they got him off the air pressure nozzle and Hen stared checking him out.

Bobby , Hen , Chim and Eddie went through a whole discussion about what was wrong what they were doing and that it wasn’t working. Buck spent the time evaluating what he knew , what he could do to make it better. He was waiting for Bobby to give him something to do , anything.

“Buck I need you to grab a 14-gauge angiocath , we need to start decompressing the pleural cavity.” Bobby said finally.

“Want me to help?” Eddie offered as Buck was getting it ready.

“No I got it.” Buck tried not to snap out.

“I’d go lower.”

“What? No , second intercostal space , midclavicular line.” Buck told him , he knew what he was doing for God’s sake.

“The chest wall’s thinner at the fifth intercostal at the anterior axillary line. There’s decreased chance of injuring any vital organs. I’ve done this mid combat on guys with collapsed lungs.” He turned to Bobby for permission.

“Do it.” Bobby nodded at him.

Buck couldn’t believe this. Bobby was giving his job to the new guy all because he claimed he could do it better. There was no respect for Buck at all. He swallowed his anger at being shown up and pushed the doubts to the back of his mind. Those were in Doug’s voice , telling him he wasn’t good enough.

“Please.” He held out his hand for the angiocath. Buck slapped it a little harder then he meant to into his hand. “Thanks.”

Buck leaned back , at least he had been polite while making him look like an idiot. Not that that made Buck feel any better. This was what he was afraid of ever since the new guy showed up , being pushed out.

“Hey can you help me with his shirt?” Buck bit his tongue as he ripped the shirt open , he knew how to do that thanks to Doug.

Eddie placed the needle and the sound of air escaping filled the silence. Hen was smiling at him and Bobby reassuring the victim that he would be okay. Buck took the time to look at Eddie while everyone was focused on something else. He was still attractive , very much so , but he was obviously straight and trying to take Buck’s place so it would never go anywhere. Not that he could do anything if he wanted since no one knew he was gay. After loading the guy in the ambulance and packing away the gear everyone took turns praising Eddie on his good work.

“Yeah good call.” Buck mumbled as he passed him to crawl in the truck.

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After shift was over Buck made his way home , well Abby’s place anyway. He was staying there while she was gone so she didn’t have to worry about anything happening to it while she was gone. And he got free room out of the deal and kept up the appearance of him dating her so it was win-win all around. He sighed as he walked in the front door , tossing his keys in the bowl as he flipped on the light. He stopped noticing the opened bottle of wine on the counter and the sound of the shower running. For a second he freaked thinking Doug had found him , but then he realized that if that were the case he would have already hit him. He looked into the bedroom and spotted clothes on Abby’s bed and smiled , she was back and didn’t tell him. He had a prank for her being secretive , he walked toward the shower stripping as he went.

He smiled as he entered the bathroom naked , this wasn’t the first time they had been naked. There was the time they tried to sleep together before Buck had told her the truth and the few times that things were so bad that she had crawled in the shower to comfort him from the nightmares of Doug. He slowly peeled the curtain back hoping to scare her when he was greeted by a scream.

“Dammit Evan don’t you know how to knock!” not Abby screamed.

“Maddie?!” Buck covered his junk after a second. He hadn’t seen his sister since he married Doug and was forced to cut off contact.

“Me? What are you even doing here? How-how did you find me?” he asked in shock.

“Well I tried to go see you in Pennsylvania , but Doug said you had left him , found someone else and hightailed it out on him. “ Maddie said gripping the curtain around her body.

“Well you saw me he.”

“Yeah , but why didn’t you tell me you were leaving Doug?”

“I did not cheat on that…you know what let’s talk after you get dressed.” Buck said in a small voice.

“Yeah that’s fine.”

Buck turned and left the bathroom , Maddie seeing a flash of his ass before she could shut the curtain. He couldn’t believe that Doug was telling people that he had cheated on him. Although he wasn’t sure what he had thought he would say , guess he never really thought about it except for what Doug would do if he ever found him. He set about making dinner for him and his sister , God it had been so long since he had seen his family. His dad had never been onboard with him being gay and his mom thought there was something off with Doug. If only he had listened to her.

“So how have you been little brother?” Maddie asked as Buck handed her a plate of scrambled eggs bacon and a few links of sausage.

“Alright been working as a firefighter.”

“I know that , it’s how I found you after Doug told me you left him for another man. What happened Buck , you were never unfaithful before?” Maddie asked.

“So you believe him?” Buck asked her quietly.

“I don’t know what to think. You guys got married and I know things were strained with Dad , but you cut all of us off and after five years enough was enough so I went to find you and you’re not there. So tell me what happened. “

“I never wanted to stop seeing you guys , even though things were so tense with Dad. It was just that Doug…well he was my husband and I had to _live_ with him not you.” He spoke to the counter.

“What does that mean Buck?” Maddie asked concern in her voice.

“The first time was because I told him I was too tired to have sex with him , he smacked me and then apologized so fast my head was spinning. After that it didn’t happen again for a few weeks. It was small things after that , comments that he made or rules he set down. By the time he really laid into me for the first time it was already too far. I was in it and there was no getting out , you guys were gone and I had nothing to my name. It took me three years to save and plan it all out before I could leave. I came here.”

“Oh my god Buck!” Maddie was crying , Buck tried not to cry over it anymore. He had made it out that was what mattered.

“It’s fine Mads , I got away. I just hope that he can’t find me the same way , cause I’m sure he won’t let me go if he does.” Buck tells her with tears in his eyes.

“I won’t let him hurt you ever again. Now tell me who taught you how to cook this good?” Maddie always knew how to make him laugh.

“My boss has been teaching me , haven’t made it past breakfast yet though.”

“Well it’s nice , like this place.”

“It’s Abby’s. “

“Who’s Abby?”

“She’s my ‘girlfriend’.” Buck smirks.

“No one knows you’re gay , Buck!”

“Not like they would really care , we have a paramedic , Hen , she’s got a wife. I just felt like I needed to change my life after Doug and I tried to get with women to uphold this playboy image they had of me , but it didn’t work at all. Me and Abby met on the job , she’s a 911 operator and we tried to date , but then I ended up telling her that I was gay and about Doug and she agreed to ‘date’ me so I didn’t have to worry about it.”

“She must be a saint.”

“She’s doing this ‘Eat , Pray , Love’ thing through Europe at the moment. The whole station thinks I’m heartbroken she’s left me.”

“That’s because the love part of that whole thing is her banging other guys.”

“Well , that explains that. What’s the eat and pray part?” Buck asked laughing.

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Buck was in the gym at the station working out , he knew he was perfectly fine the way he was but there was still that little Doug voice from the day before telling him that Chim was right , he needed to lose more. He had had trouble before , becoming slightly anorexic at one point when he was with Doug. He was half way through his set when Eddie came in the room. Buck faltered for a second then continued lifting the weights. Maybe he could show off a little , he went and grabbed more weight ignoring Chimney’s head shake at him.

He put the weights on the bar , thinking that now would be a perfect time for a few pics. He was gonna have so many choices the judges weren’t gonna know what hit them. Chim was working by himself while Eddie was boxing with the bag , though Buck would deny watching as he bounced and punched. He hated the selfie stick , it made you look like a douche but he had no one to take the pics for him , not a chance in hell was he asking either of them.

“You’re in the wrong light.” Eddie spoke up.

“Some of us don’t need light to look good.” Buck shot back.

“Speak for yourself , what do you mean the wrong light Eddie?” Chim asked.

“This light is to flat and makes you look dull. You need warm light to make your muscles pop. Here this is what I mean.” He said pulling out his phone and pulling up the pictures he had taken for his submission.

“These are the ones I sent in.”

Buck wandered over to sneak a peek. Damn he was right about light making a picture better , he wanted to lick the abs on the one with the ax over his shoulders. What was he thinking , he couldn’t beat that. He didn’t have the body to compete with Eddie , he was gonna lose. Doug had been right.

“It’s cheating you know to use a professional to take your pics.”

“Uh , she’s 12 the photographer. She’s my niece actually.” Eddie said sharing a smile with Chim. God he even made friends faster than Buck did.

“Do you think she’d take mine too?” Chim asked. Buck tried to tune it out , pretend that it didn’t hurt that Eddie was just taking over everything.

“Sure she’d love to. She’s a master with her I-Phone.”

“You know you shouldn’t get his hopes up.” Buck snapped tired of the camaraderie. It was quiet for a second before Buck thought about how that sounded.

“No offense Chim. “ he said quickly.

“None taken _Evan._ ” Chim said quietly.

“What’s your problem?” Eddie asked as Buck tried to fight the instinct to apologize.

He looked up to find Eddie walking toward him the anger apparent on his face. Buck flinched and tried to cover it by dropping the weight. He still had trouble when faced with aggression , Doug’s face popping in his head as some memory would overtake the moment. He tried to avoid situations that brought it on , especially around the crew who would question him if he had a panic attack. He looked at Chim and knew he wouldn’t be able to back down this time.

“Ok , it’s you the way you come in here and are already best buds with everyone. It’s supposed to be hard , you’re supposed to take time to mesh with everyone.”

“I’m sorry you think I’m too friendly. Look I know you are having some personal issues right now but… “

“What issues are you talking about?” Buck cut him off , fear in his eyes for a moment.

“I meant that I heard your girlfriend just broke up with you and you’re dealing with that and all.”

“No , I’m not , she didn’t break up with me. Who told you that?” He looked toward Chim who suspiciously kept facing forward.

“All I’m saying is I hear you’re a good guy and things are tough at the moment , but we are on the same team. No need to be threatened by me.” Eddie tells him waving a hand between them that Buck sees out the corner of his eye and half ducks before he can stop himself.

Eddie looks at him in shock for a moment and all Buck can do is glance at Chim who looks confused. He turns back to Eddie , trying to see what he’s thinking. He can’t read anything in his eyes. That and the fact that he just did that in front of Chim makes him angry , at Eddie for causing it , but more at himself for allowing it to happen.

“Why would I be threatened by you?” He sneers out.

“Exactly what I’m saying we do the same thing , I’ve just done it while getting shot at.” Eddie tries to lighten the situation.

“We’re not broken up.” Buck mutters as Eddie leaves the room. He chooses to ignore Chim snickering in the corner.

He’s not even bothered by the implication that Abby broke up with him. It’s the lack of respect they have for him. To laugh at him like he was an idiot , it hurt him. He had been part of the team for nearly a year now and now it was like that never happened. Eddie was better , at posing for the calendar and doing the job better than Buck could. Even making friends with everyone was easier for him , not like Buck had the disadvantage of being in an abusive relationship for the past five years or anything making friendships hard.

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The rest of the afternoon was quiet and once again Buck found himself hiding out. He didn’t want to deal with Eddie or anyone for that matter. He thought about texting Abby and telling her , but what Maddie said had given him some perspective. Abby was doing her own thing and didn’t need a screw up like him weighing her down. He needed to learn to deal on his own. He stayed by himself till they got a call after dark , him and Bobby walking in the house.

“Wow , this guy has a thing for guns and the military doesn’t he?” Buck tried to lighten the mood that had been tense in the truck on the ride , obviously the news of his confrontation had spread.

“ _In here….help…”_ a voice called out.

“I can hear him , can you tell where it’s coming from?” Bobby asked ignoring Buck.

Buck had no idea where the voice was coming from , he wished he did then maybe he could get back on Bobby’s good side. Didn’t matter in a few seconds anyway Bobby found the right door on his own. Yet another screw up for Buck again , this day just got better and better. They walked down into the room where the victim was sitting in a chair.

“Oh thank god.” He said as they reached him.

“What’s your name?”

“Name’s Charlie , I thought you’d never make it in time.”

“What happened Charlie?”

“The grenade went off when I was taking it apart.” He started.

“Why would you want to take it apart?” Buck asked incredulously as he pulled stuff out the kit.

“I’m kind of a collector in case you didn’t notice. It needed to be cleaned.”

“Yeah we noticed.” Bobby said.

“So did you pull the pin?” Buck asked , he figured that a grenade exploding would do more damage.

“It’s not that kind of grenade , it’s a 40-Mike-mike. A practice round for an m203 grenade launcher , I picked it up at a flea market. I don’t know what happened , I must have hit something and it went off.”

“Ok it’s ok Charlie we got you now. I see metal , a lot of shrapnel in the wound. Looks like it nicked the artery , we gotta get you out of here now Charlie. “ Bobby said to him calmly.

Bobby radioed it in as they wheeled Charlie out on the stretcher to the ambo waiting outside. Charlie looked like he was trying his hardest not to puke and really considering the damage Buck had seen , he wasn’t gonna blame him if he did blow chunks. Would suck to be the paramedics riding in the back with him he thought.

“Buck I want you to ride with him help keep him stable.” Bobby turned to him with a mischievous glint in his eye. When Buck spotted Eddie in the back looking at him he knew why.

“You got to learn to play nice. “ he offered before Buck crawled in.

They worked in silence for the first few minutes , Buck sneaking looks at Eddie when he had the chance. The tension was palpable in the back of the ambo , but at least Charlie wasn’t picking up on it. The longer it went on though the more tense Buck got , it reminded him too much of Doug before he would snap.

“I bet you saw a lot of these.” He said quietly.

“A fare few.” Eddie conceded.

“Ever seen a guy with rebar through his skull?” Buck asked trying to make some type of conversation.

“What exactly are we measuring here Buck?” Eddie sighed , and didn’t that just piss Buck off.

“Ughhh.” Charlie moaned , bringing their attention back to him.

“That dressing needs changing its soaking through.” Eddie nodded at the wound.

“I know when to change them.” Buck snapped pulling the gauze away to put fresh on , but before he could Eddie grabbed his arm.

“What am I not doing it the right way again?” Buck snapped.

“I thought you said this was a practiced round?” He asked Charlie.

“It is.” Charlie said.

“What’s-what’s wrong?” Buck asked hands in the air , confused as hell.

“Practice rounds are blue caps , that is gold. Gold caps are live , we gotta stop. HEY PULL OVER!” he yelled as he beat on the wall.

“There it is.” Bomb squad tech said looking at the xray.

“You’re telling me he has a live round embedded in his thigh?” Bobby asked.

“I thought it already went off?” Buck asked.

“It has a two part detonation , gun powder forces the round out and then the explosive charge that makes it go boom.” Eddie told him.

“So smart guy why didn’t this one go boom?”

“It’s fitted with a proximity fuse , their attempt to limit friendly fire incidents. It has a sensor that tells it it’s far enough away to explode.” Eddie looked at Buck.

“It probably hasn’t decided it’s far enough just going from his hand to his leg. Either way we can’t just take him in the hospital with a live round in his leg that can go off at any moment.”

“We called the military they’re sending someone over.” Bomb squad guy tells them.

“Military , you mean you guys can’t do it…you are the bomb squad?” Buck looked at him incredulously.

“We need someone who can get it out without setting it off , that takes actual knowledge of the ordinance. The military is sending someone up from Pendleton , they should be here within the hour.”

“This guy doesn’t have an hour.” Buck protested looking to Cap.

“I can do it , he needs surgery or he’s gonna die. I have some experience with this particular ordinance , I think I can take it out safely.” Eddie spoke up from Buck’s other side.

Buck looked at Eddie while he assured Cap that he could handle it. It irked Buck that here he was taking the risky cases , that’s what Buck always did. Guy is dangling from a rollercoaster and we gotta reposition the truck , Buck climbs up the frame untethered. Buck was the go to for the dangerous stuff , not this hot shot intent on taking over everything of Buck’s.

“I’m in.” he blurted out , knowing that Maddie would kill him if she found out.

“Grab it , get it out and into the box then get the hell out of there.” Bomb squad guy handed Eddie a claw and a box.

“Copy that.” He said as he strapped the last strap of his vest on.

Buck was still strapping his on when Eddie walked by telling him he’d see him in there. He just nodded , nerves getting to him a bit. He was now starting to realize that he could actually get blown up in there , what the hell was he thinking. Bobby was looking at him with that knowing look that told him he was about to get the dad voice.

“You don’t have to do this you know.”

“You think I’m letting the new guy have all the fun?” he joked “But seriously you wanted us to ‘bond’ , we could end up real close soon.” He told Bobby and turned to Join Eddie in the truck.

“How you feeling Charlie?” He asked as he hopped in the back with Eddie.

“Like a real freaking idiot , I’m sorry you guys are having to risk yourselves to save my stupid ass. My wife would tell me ‘I told you so’ , hell she just might get the chance in a minute.”

“Well I hate to tell you this , but I gotta lot of living to do , gotta find my own special person so ain’t no one leaving this life tonight.” Buck told him missing the look Eddie gave him.

“Gonna put you out , we’ll see you on the flipside.” Eddie told him as they knocked him out.

“He’s out. Apply pressure try to minimize the bleeding while I try to get a grip on it.”

It was a tense few seconds , Buck trying to keep pressure without it being too much pressure while Eddie tried to grab the slippery round without turning it. Buck could feel the sweat beading on his forehead and running down his back as he watched Eddie try to grasp the round.

“I got now I just gotta pull it out.” Eddie said completely fixated on the round.

“Well pull it out then.” Buck said stupidly.

“I am , I just got to be careful not to turn it as I pull….shit I’m gonna have to turn it a bit.” Eddie said in frustration.

“Well don’t turn it too much.” Buck licked his lips.

Eddie turned slowly pulling at the same time waiting for it to pop free and praying that it wasn’t too many turns. He really didn’t want to be the one to kill himself on the streets of L.A. after surviving Afghanistan. That would be stupid. That and he really didn’t want to kill Buck , no matter how standoffish he was to him. He was kinda hot.

“Got it , get the box.” He told Buck as he pulled the round out.

Once it was in the box and the box on the floor they grabbed Charlie and his equipment. They got the stretcher on the ground and rolled him away as fast as possible. Buck felt giddy , that adrenaline rush after traumatic situations getting to him. They handed Charlie off to the second ambo crew that had been waiting to get him in surgery. Buck sighed to release the energy as Eddie turned to look at him , his eyes bright with excitement and Buck thought he looked amazing.

“You are bad ass under pressure b-brother.” He told Buck.

“Me?” Buck questioned , he was the combat veteran with the silver star , he was badass.

“Yeah you , you can have my back any day.” Eddie told him with a smile.

“Or…or you could have mine….my back too I mean.” Buck stuttered , definitely not meaning his ass at all. He blushed as Eddie nodded and laughed , maybe he was wrong about the new guy after all.

“Deal.” Eddie told him.

“Good work you two.” Bobby said as he walked up , eyeing the pair of them.

“He’s a good guy Cap , wasn’t worried a bit.” Buck had that stupid grin on his face.

Suddenly the ambulance blew up , a fireball rising as the windshield blew out and the doors open. Bobby and Buck ducked instinctively while Eddie just stared at it. Buck took a few seconds to realize that he could have been in there , sharing a disbelieving look with Bobby. As one they turned to look at Eddie who looked completely nonplussed.

“You guys hungry?” he asked pointing to the Burger King nearby like it was nothing.

Buck looked at Cap and back to Eddie , he couldn’t believe this guy. Eddie just smiled at him and Buck felt his heart skip a beat at it. This guy was something else for sure. Something he wasn’t sure he should even entertain thoughts about. He wasn’t gonna find anyone after Doug he thought dejectedly. The light dimming in his eyes a little at the thought.

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The next day they had a call to a group of friends that cemented their friends head into a microwave oven. Sure they put a breathing tube in , but the entire idea was so damn stupid. Buck worked on getting the frame off so they could figure out how to get the hardened concrete off. Of course then the guy had to panic and stand , stumbling until he fell in the pool. Without a thought buck dove in after him , Eddie following Buck. Together they got him out the pool and the oven off.

Buck nearly lost his concentration with a dripping wet Eddie next to him but he managed to keep it. Cap held the chisel while Buck hammered it into the cement with the sledgehammer. A few hits and it was busted apart. They ripped the plastic bag off the guy’s head and got him back. Of course his idiot friends who were just bawling over him decided they needed to finish filming. Cap took care of that real quick by throwing the phone into the pool.

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Back at the station Buck was determined to give Eddie a cool nickname. He was enjoying the budding friendship between them , even if he was saddened that that was all it would ever be. He was standing next to the pinball machine , ignoring the way Eddie’s arms flexed as he played , throwing names out.

“What about G.I….like G.I. Joe? That’s a great nickname.” He smirked at Eddie.

“Sounds like a virus or something. Like Gastrointestinal.” Hen said from the counter.

“Yeah I think I’ll pass on that one.” Eddie laughed.

“Listen up gang , the calendar people just called they made their decision.”

“I’m sorry you guys , good effort.” Buck said flexing his arms.

“Yeah they didn’t pick you.” Bobby said.

“Fine , it’s fixed anyway , congrats G.I.” He smirked at Eddie.

“Yeah it wasn’t him either. “

“No way Cap you?!” Buck said in awe , sure he was over his Doug induced paranoia at the moment with Eddie , but as much as he liked Cap no way was he hotter than both him and Eddie.

“Nope. “ He said turning to look at Chim.

“Congrats Mr. April!”

Everyone walked over to congratulate Chim who was standing there in slight shock after he realized what Cap had said. They were all joking and clapping him on the back , Buck admitting to himself that he really didn’t need to win to feel good about himself , especially since he and Eddie were getting along.

“Hey you.” Athena called as she walked up the stairs in uniform. For a moment Buck thought she was talking to him , remembering how she had chewed him out after the baby incident.

“I’m sorry.” She said as Bobby walked over to her.

“Oh yeah , I’m sorry too.” He said and then she wrapped her arms around him and kissed him soft and sweet.

The whole group stood in shock watching Bobby and Athena kiss. Buck looked at the others and saw that he wasn’t the only one who had no idea about this. That made him feel better , at least he wasn’t alone.

“Wait a minute…” Chim said as they broke apart.

“What , no more announcements let’s eat.” Bobby said leading Athena to the table.

They all sat down for a good meal cooked by Bobby. Eddie took the seat next to Buck and bumped his leg with his. Buck smiled at him and passed him the pasta. Things were great , finally. They were all meshing together and Buck couldn’t be happier. Well he could if he and Eddie had a chance then he could be happier , but still.

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He got home before Maddie that night and was getting a glass of wine when his phone rang. He looked at the caller ID but all he saw was a private number. Always committed to answering the phone in case it was Abby he picked it up.

“Abby?” he asked.

“No it’s not Abby , who the hell is Abby?” Doug’s voice came through the other end.

“How did you get this number?” Buck asked his heart beating out his chest and a cold sweat breaking out all over his body.

“That doesn’t matter , what matters is I will find you and when I do you’re gonna wish you were dead.” Buck threw that phone at the wall shattering it.

He dropped to the floor to hug his knees to his chest. This couldn’t be happening. How could he have found his number. He was still sitting there when Maddie came in excited that she was gonna stay and be a 911 operator so they would be close. She saw him on the ground and dropped down next to him .

“What is it Ev?” she asked.

“He called , he found my number. What am I gonna do if he finds me?”

“We’ll take care of that when and if it happens. I’m not gonna let anything happen to you again and neither will the people you work with , your friends. You just need to tell them. “she gave him the look.

“Not unless things get worse , I don’t want to be not only the gay guy who lied about being straight but the abused gay guy at that. “ he pleaded with her to understand.

“Okay Buck it’s your call.” She said kissing him on the forehead.

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The next morning Buck was on shift as Maddie was at her first day at the 911 center. He was staring at Eddie’s ass as he bent over to rummage in the fridge. He was tired , hardly sleeping last night thanks to Doug’s call , but he was working off three cups of coffee so he was going strong. Suddenly the lights flickered and the whole building shook. He jumped up as the shaking got worse , realizing that this was the first earthquake he had ever been in and he had no idea what to do. Eddie ran over and grabbed him pushing him under the table and diving under after him.

Eddie looked at Buck to make sure he was ok , buck could only stare in shock at what was going on around him. He sat there huddled under the table with Eddie’s arm around him while stuff fell from the walls and ceiling. He was only slightly excited that Eddie had his arm around him gripping him tight to his side , mostly he was terrified at the earthquake. This was gonna be a long shift he thought as it slowed then stopped.

As they climbed from under the table Eddie kept his hand on Buck and they joined the others walking outside to survey the damage. Once they were out front of the station Eddie dropped his hand and they all stared in silence at the amount of destruction they could see.

“Gonna be a long day folks , get ready.” Bobby said as Buck looked at Eddie.

 

MY FIRST SHOT AT 9-1-1 FANFICTION….LOOK FOR MY BUDDIE GROUP ON FACEBOOK 911 BUCK/EDDIE FANS….HOPE TO SEE SOME NEW MEMBERS…THOUGHTS ARE WELCOMED….


	2. Shake , Rattle and Roll

_Previously on Run To You…._

_The next morning Buck was on shift as Maddie was at her first day at the 911 center. He was staring at Eddie’s ass as he bent over to rummage in the fridge. He was tired , hardly sleeping last night thanks to Doug’s call , but he was working off three cups of coffee so he was going strong. Suddenly the lights flickered and the whole building shook. He jumped up as the shaking got worse , realizing that this was the first earthquake he had ever been in and he had no idea what to do. Eddie ran over and grabbed him pushing him under the table and diving under after him._

_Eddie looked at Buck to make sure he was ok , buck could only stare in shock at what was going on around him. He sat there huddled under the table with Eddie’s arm around him while stuff fell from the walls and ceiling. He was only slightly excited that Eddie had his arm around him gripping him tight to his side , mostly he was terrified at the earthquake. This was gonna be a long shift he thought as it slowed then stopped._

_As they climbed from under the table Eddie kept his hand on Buck and they joined the others walking outside to survey the damage. Once they were out front of the station Eddie dropped his hand and they all stared in silence at the amount of destruction they could see._

_“Gonna be a long day folks , get ready.” Bobby said as Buck looked at Eddie._

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They were rolling in the engine , everyone on edge stuffing breakfast in with their hands since they all knew that there was gonna be little chance of getting anything to eat most of today. Buck was still thinking about how warm Eddie’s hand had been on his back as they had crawled from under the table and walked outside. He really shouldn’t do this to himself , guy was straight and no way was he ever gonna have a chance.

“This is so good Cap , you ever think you chose the wrong profession?” Hen asked taking a bite of her omelet.

“What and miss all of you crazies?” Bobby laughed at her.

“Well , what would you do if you weren’t a firefighter?”

“Fighter pilot , codename Shogun.” Chim blurted out.

“Think about that much?” Hen teased.

“Oh yeah , well what about you smart ass?”

“Editorial cartoonist for the New Yorker. What I have a lot to say” Hen said defensively when they looked at her funny.

“I didn’t know you could draw.” Bobby told her.

“I can’t that’s why it’s a dream job.”

“What about you Buckaroo?” Chim asked.

“What?” Buck said getting startled out of his thoughts of Eddie.

“What job would you have if you weren’t a firefighter?”

“Oh…um I don’t know.”

“He’d be a golden retriever , doing what he was told.” Hen said with a smile.

“No bartender at a bar. Or no bouncer at a bar better yet.” Chim laughed.

Buck felt like that was a little extreme. Sure he had played the playboy image , but why did they have to think that’s all there was to him. Hadn’t he shown how kind and caring he was , being friends to each of them. He did joke with them , but never as much as they did about him. he felt like a joke.

“No I got it , bouncer at a strip club!” Hen cackled. Buck tried to ignore the hurt at that , he’d never even been to a strip club.

Instead of rising to the teasing he looked over at Eddie who was staring at his phone , looking like he was about to throw it. He had a look of panic , anger and fear on his face. Buck figured there was someone he was worried about , probably a wife or a girlfriend he thought bitterly.

“What’s wrong?” he asked when Eddie looked up from the phone.

“There’s no service.”

“Yeah tends to happen after quakes.” Bobby said.

“Is there someone you’re trying to get ahold of?” Buck asked , telling himself that was what friends did.

“Yeah my….my son Christopher.” Eddie said after a moment of hesitation.

“Whoa you have a kid?!” so subtlety wasn’t easy for Buck.

“Yeah I do.” Eddie got a defiant look in his eyes like he was daring Buck to give him shit. Buck realized that his outburst had been taken the wrong way. He had no problem with kids , he had wanted kids back in the beginning with Doug. But that was before he realized that it was too dangerous to have kids with Doug , if he could beat him what would he do to a child.

“Hey I love kids…really.”

“This is him , it’s just the two of us. His mom’s not in the picture.” Eddie showed him a picture on his phone.

Buck looked at the wide smile and cute glasses on the little boy who was standing in front of a house next to Eddie with a pair of crutches helping him stand. He had a look of joy on his face and Buck just knew he was laughing. Eddie was smiling as he looked down on Christopher love in his eyes and Buck yearned to have that , that smile directed at him and a son to share. He had always wanted to be near kids , maybe a teacher would be what he would do if he wasn’t a firefighter.

“He’s so adorable. Hey look I’m sure he’s fine , the schools have the best protection.” Buck told him reaching a hand out to grip Eddie’s shoulder in support.

They rolled to a stop outside a hotel that was damn near laying on its side breaking the moment. They all climbed out and got a look at the chaos. People were walking around dazed covered in dust from the buildings , there was debris everywhere and other first responders running to and fro. They found the commander in charge , getting the sit rep from her and then waited for Bobby to give them assignments.

“Ok this is how we make it through the day , this is gonna be a tough one for all of us. We all have people we’re worried about , but we also have people depending on us. Now I can’t order you to go in that building and no one will judge you if you don’t.” Bobby told them.

“Hen , Eddie you got kids.” Chim said.

“Yeah and if my kid was in that building I would hope that the people who were supposed to be there to save him did. I’m going in.” Hen told him.

“Where do you want us boss?” Eddie asked.

“Sir you really need to see this.” An officer came up to Bobby indicating they should follow him around the corner.

“That has to be what , the eleventh floor you think?” Buck asked as they all stood there looking at a guy in a bathrobe pressed against the glass window , furniture trapping him.

“You could get the ladder to the fourth floor at least , cut the climbing distance down.” Eddie said from next to Buck.

“Ok you two get that guy , the rest of you let’s get started down here.” Bobby told them.

After they took the time to repark the truck and extend the ladder they grabbed all the gear they could carry. No telling what kind of damage they had to get through to get to victims in the building so they were coming prepared. Buck had grabbed a small saw and some crow bars. As they climbed he tried to think of something to ease Eddie’s worry over his son.

“You know after the last really bad quake FEMA dropped millions of dollars into the schools , all kinds of safety features were added to help the building withstand quakes. Now they’re the safest place to be after high rises.” Buck told him as they reached the window they were going in.

“You mean high rises like this one?” Eddie looked at him incredulously.

“Well , not this one persay , but I’m saying he’s in the safest place he could be right now and he’s fine I just know it.” Buck told him.

Eddie just nodded and turned back to the window. He grabbed his own crow bar and knocked the glass out the window so they could safely crawl through. They had to enter on the right side of the building , making their way up and to the left so they could get to the trapped man in the window. The tilt of the building made walking awkward. As they climbed the stairs they had to walk more on the railing then the steps.

Finally they made it to the right floor and into the hallway. Thankfully the stairs were on one side of the building and the hallway only went one way from the exit. It at least made sure they didn’t have to split up to search or double back. They made their way down the hall , the enhanced tilt to this part of the building making them walk on the wall with one foot and the floor with the other.

“LAFD call out!” they yelled as they passed each door , beating on it to make sure.

 _“Help in here!”_ a voice yelled out from a door on their left.

Buck grabbed the small saw from his bag and set it between the door and the frame. He was about to flip the switch when Eddie reached over and lowered his safety glasses off his head and onto his face. Buck just smiled sheepishly at him. He forgot things sometimes. Once he cut through the bolt Eddie kicked the door in.

“Oh thank god!” a woman’s voice said from around a pillar in the middle of the room.

“We’re going to get you out don’t worry , just sit tight.” Buck told her.

“Forget her get me!” bathrobe guy called out.

“Oh screw you asshole.” She told him.

“First date?” Buck teased.

“No this was a business meeting where my fat , married with five kids ass of a boss decided to ask me to shower with him.” she sneered at him.

“Really dude , haven’t you been paying attention this past year. That shit ain’t cool.”

“Yeah , yeah I know. Look get me out of this and I’ll only do business with men how’s that for you , never have a problem like this again.”

“Until you get some gay guy.”

“Screw the gays , get me out of here.”

“I’ll take the woman you take him.” Buck told Eddie as he anchored the lines for repelling to them.

“Sure stick me with the homophobic asshole.” Eddie gave him a look.

Buck watched Eddie make his way to the idiotic douche , keeping his mind occupied on the way the pants hugged his ass. It really was a nice ass , he knew it had to be full and firm. Probably just as tanned as the rest of him was too , he thought. He had a little moment imagining wrapping his arms around Eddie , placing his hands on that ass and pulling him flush against him , grinding their cocks together as they kissed and moaned into each other’s mouths. He shook his head to clear his thoughts , glancing down at the erection he was now sporting. Great he thought.

They worked together , Eddie helping Buck repel into the room to a desk that was anchored to the floor. Once he was set up there he threw another rope to the woman and while she tied it around herself Eddie repelled past them toward the guy. He was nearly there when there was a loud cracking noise and they all froze.

“Sir don’t move the glass is cracking , don’t even talk.” Eddie told him tossing a chair out his way and trying to hurry.

He tossed a look back at Buck who had the woman almost to him. Turning back to focus on getting to the guy he felt the building start to shake. Shit he wasn’t going to make it. He needed more time. Buck was three feet away from grabbing the girl so there was no help there.

“I’m gonna tie this around you and get you off the glass.” He told him as he came to a stop on the window frame.

“Just save me.” The guy cried as the shaking increased.

“Ahhhh!” the woman yelled just as the shaking really got going and the rope came undone one step from Buck’s hand.

Eddie saw her start to fall the same time the glass shattered and the guy went out. He fell screaming to his death , but Eddie didn’t have time to worry about him. He reached out a hand and snatched the woman right before she slid out the window , dragging him halfway out the window too.

“Eddie!” buck screamed grabbing Eddie’s line.

He grabbed it and wrapped it up , bracing himself against the desk so he could start pulling them up. There was no way he was losing Eddie. He felt his hands start to ache even with the gloves on. When he grabbed and pushed with his legs he was able to pull one to two feet at a time. Finally he had Eddie in the room and he could turn and help pull the woman in. Buck could feel his hands getting wet , the pain intensifying. He knew they were cut and getting worse , but he had had worse from Doug and he was used to pain so he gritted his teeth and kept pulling.

“Almost there ma’am.” Eddie told her as he pulled her in the window.

After he got her safely inside they started making their way up the room toward Buck. Buck helped her up and behind the desk before turning to help Eddie. He grabbed Eddie’s hand and yanked him to him , wrapping his arms around him and pulling him tight against his body. His heart racing at the thought he had almost lost him. At least in all the commotion he had lost his erection so it wasn’t as awkward as it could have been.

“It’s ok I’m ok.” Eddie told him.

“I know.” Buck replied , his breath hitching in Eddie’s ear.

“Let’s get out of here.” Buck said pulling back and turning away before Eddie could see his glossy eyes.

“Sounds good to me.” The woman told them , staring at them oddly.

They made their way slowly out the room and down the hall to the staircase , taking their time since she had lost her shoes out the window. Eddie went first and would help her down while Buck brought up the rear thinking about what had just happened. When they were a few floors down she had to stop for a minute.

“Do you think he’ll still be there , on the sidewalk I mean.” She asked them.

“No ma’am and we’re not going out that way anyway. “ Buck told her.

“The name’s Ali.” She told him with a smile.

“We should keep moving before the next aftershock.” Eddie told them , ignoring the twinge of jealousy that he felt at the sight of her smiling at Buck.

“This is Captain Nash of the 118 , I need a head count.” Bobby came over the radio.

“This is Diaz and Buckley , we’re all good.” Eddie responded into the radio. They listened as everyone called in except Hen.

“Henrietta Wilson this is Captain Nash please call out.” Bobby came across the radio three more times with no answer from Hen.

“Is that a friend of yours?” Ali asked.

“Let’s just get you out of here.” Eddie told her sharing a look with Eddie.

“Wait , what did you mean the _next_ aftershock?” she asked.

Instead of responding they just continued down the stairs. Things were going great for a few more floors. Buck was thinking about Eddie , Eddie thinking about Buck and Hen. Buck knew he shouldn’t have hugged Eddie like that but damn he was so scared when he saw him slide out the window , he had almost went after him.

“Well , shit. We aren’t going out this way.” Eddie said as he turned the staircase and found it blocked by debris.

“What now?” Ali asked them.

“Now we go back up and find another way out.” Eddie told her.

They turned around , Buck leading the way back up with Eddie in the rear. He could tell that Ali’s feet weren’t gonna take much more of the debris. She was wincing with every step and there were a few red spots in her footprints. Two floors up they busted out the stairwell and into another hallway.

“Can’t we just find a window and get onto a ladder?” Ali asked as Buck helped her through the door and to the side.

“Not anymore the building has shifted to far over for that to be an option.” Eddie told her as he came through looking for the map next to the stairs.

Eddie checked the closest side to the door but it wasn’t there so he prepared to go up around Buck and the girl to the other side. As he went past he brushed against Buck’s back , noticing the shiver that went through him. He smirked a little to himself , not really sure why he thought that was amusing.

“”Don’t worry we’ll get you out of here Abby.” Buck said distractedly.

“Ali , not Abby. Ali.” She corrected him.

“Oh did I say Abby?” Buck asked blushing.

“Yeah who’s Abby?”

“She’s my…it’s complicated.” Buck finished.

“It’s always complicated.”

“She’s traveling in Europe right now , this is the first time I’m glad she’s not here. One less person to worry about.” Buck told her as they walked further down the hall.

“I don’t know it’d be nice to have someone to worry about.” She smiled at Buck and he felt his face heat. She thought he was straight with a long distance girlfriend , why did they automatically assume he was a sex crazed douche?

They stopped a few doors down while Eddie tried to clear enough of the debris to get to the end of the hall. Buck watched out the corner of his eye as Eddie bent , lifting and turning made his muscles flex. He turned to look back the other way before he could be caught and saw Ali take a small bottle of vodka off the cart outside a door and chug it. Eddie caught the sight and stopped what he was doing to stare at her too.

“What after the day I had I deserve it and it’s not like it’s slowing us down.” She said defensively , they both wisely held up their hands.

 _“Help me…please…anyone…”_ a voice came out one of the rooms beside them.

“Did you hear that?” Buck asked Eddie.

“Good thing you chugged that , we’d have never heard him with the talking and moving.” Eddie told her as they busted in the door the voice was coming from.

Once in the room Buck and Eddie made their way to the right , Buck hoping this guy wasn’t at the window. He had had enough of dealing with windows to last a lifetime. The memory of Eddie sliding toward the nothingness outside of it was too much. Buck pointed as he spotted a pair of shoes behind some furniture close to the door.

“Hey we’re here.”

“Oh thank god I thought no one was going to find me.” A hotel worker said.

“Stay still we need to check you out before we can move you.”

“I may have shit myself.” The guy told them sadly , blushing in embarrassment.

“I almost did earlier , nearly fell out a window it happens sometimes.” Eddie told him as he checked his body for injuries.

Buck inspected his head , he had a visible wound on his right temple , but that seemed to be it. He looked up to see how Eddie was doing. He was busy checking the man’s chest , arms and legs. This guy kind of reminded him of him , after Doug had finished with him. He had spent more than one night lying on the floor in a pool of his own blood before. Afraid to move in case he did more damage or worse….angered Doug again.

“Ok we need to roll you over , this may hurt.” Eddie told him nodding he was ready to Buck.

Together they rolled him on his right side and inspected his back. It was the main area of concern. Despite what Eddie had said to make the man feel better , shitting yourself wasn’t a good sign. Buck spotted Eddie skip over the man’s backside so he was sure he had been right , he’d shit himself. After Eddie was done they rolled him back over then Buck slid further into the room to find something to use as a backboard.

They had to move him while keeping him stable else they risked doing more damage. Eddie joined him a moment later and they shared a look. This wasn’t looking good. They might have to leave him and come back in when they had a back board , but if there was another quake he could die if the building collapsed completely. Looking out the window Buck saw that the sun had gone down.

“Loss of bladder control and numbness , this guy has spinal damage. We need a back board to get him out.” Eddie told him.

“Hey guys what about this?” Ali said from the door holding an ironing board.

“That could work , but how are we gonna get him down the stairs?” Eddie looked at Buck.

“What if we didn’t use the stairs?” Buck smirked at him.

After securing the man to the ironing board and placing rolled up towels around his head to keep it stable they walked down the hallway , telling him they’d be right back. Halfway down was the elevators , Buck’s bright idea. He took one side and Eddie the other managing to pry the doors open. As Buck stowed the crow bars Eddie laid on his stomach to look into the shaft.

“At least it’s not blocked.” Eddie said as he looked down the empty shaft.

“Or an elevator. How much does that thing weigh?” Ali asked as she joined him.

“About twenty-five hundred to three thousand pounds.” Eddie said turning on his back to look up at the elevator.

“I like our chances.” Buck said stepping up to the shaft , straddling Eddie’s body as he did.

Eddie stared up at Buck as he looked up toward the elevator then back down at him. There was an excitement in his eyes and he was breathing a little heavier Eddie noted. Buck just smiled down at Eddie , he liked the danger of this job. It was so different from the danger of Doug. Eddie returned his smile , making Buck’s heart speed up. He looked good there under him , he had always been more of a bottoming from the top type of guy , but there was no chance of that with Doug.

“You are such a daredevil.” Eddie told him , his eyes going serious with something that Buck knew he had to be imagining.

“You’re just jealous it wasn’t your idea.” Buck joked , breaking the moment.

“Maybe.”

“Well let’s do it.” Buck said extending his hand out for Eddie to grab and helping him off the floor.

They went back down the hallway to retrieve the hotel employee. Once everyone was at the elevator shaft Buck helped Eddie get the back board over the edge then himself. Buck sat on the edge and helped ease them down the shaft a few floors so they could get past the blockage.

“About eight more feet Buck.” Eddie called up.

“So Abby’s complicated , what’s he?” Ali asked him.

“Nothing , we’re co-workers and friends.” Buck told her hoping Eddie couldn’t hear and realizing that he had forgotten his hands after the chaos of almost losing Eddie. Now they were ripping back open even worse , but he ignored it.

“Sure you are.” She said.

“Ok hold up.” Eddie said as he started to open the shaft doors in front of him.

He managed to pop them open , pushing the worker through as much as he could. The angle of the building helped a lot. He signaled for buck to lower the man a little at a time as he directed him through the doors to the floor. Just as he was getting him through there was a creak that started.

“Ready to go?” Buck asked Ali.

“Yeah,” she said moving to straddle his lap.

“Well , good thing there’s nothing between you two or this would be awkward.” She laughed as they slide off the edge into the shaft.

“Is the building shaking?” the guy asked.

“Shit aftershock , get down here Buck now!” Eddie yelled swinging into the door so he could get the man out the way.

Eddie pushed the man through the door way , swinging in behind him so he could get him out the way for Buck. He laid the man down on the floor and went back to the door. The elevator above them started to jerk as the aftershock got stronger. It slipped then caught again as Buck slid down as fast as he could.

“Come on.” Eddie said urgently.

“I’m coming!” Buck yelled.

Suddenly Buck lost his grip on the rope for a second and they flew toward the bottom. He caught it just as they were reaching the door , Eddie pulling the rope in so they’d slide inside. As Buck hit the doorway Ali slipped from his lap and tumbled through. Eddie tried to slow her but he was still holding the rope , above them the elevator let go completely. Buck come barreling in the doorway crashing into Eddie and they both tumbled to the opposite wall.

“Oof.” Eddie said as his back hit the wall and Buck pressed against him.

“Well , I’ve had better landings.” Buck said raising his head up to look at Eddie where it had landed in his chest.

“I hope so.” Eddie told him smiling.

“Ow.’ Ali said making Buck realize that he was pressing Eddie against the wall , their faces only inches apart. He pulled back and went to check on her , blush heating his face.

“I told you I liked our chances.” Buck said as he helped her up.

“We need all available hands on the south side of the building.” Bobby’s voice came over the radio.

“They must have found someone.” Eddie said.

“Might be Hen.” Buck replied , they could hope.

“Negative Captain , possible complete collapse. Evac now , repeat evac now.”

“Shit , we gotta get out of here.” Eddie said as they moved to pick up the employee and get moving.

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They made their way out the rest of the building , handing the victims off to the EMTs. Then they looked at each other , nodding and turning to get lost in the crowd. Bobby and Chim weren’t with the others that had come from the search for Hen. Buck knew that Bobby was after Hen and they were gonna need help. They made their way down toward the parking garage and came around the corner to find Bobby , Chim and a big ass truck.

“Need a hand Cap?” Buck asked.

“You were ordered to leave the building you know that right?” Bobby chastised them.

“Yeah we know.” Buck and Eddie said in unison , smiling at each other.

“And they will be dually reprimanded after we get your girl out of here.” The commander said as she lead a group of other firefighters around the corner too.

“Looks like you’ll have to reprimand yourself too.” Bobby told her.

Together they all worked to make a hole in the debris. After pulling , shifting and clearing as much as they could there was a small opening. They all stood for a minute looking at the hole. Then there was a barking sound and they all looked on as a small dog , little girl and Hen all crawled out. Everyone rushing to get them through the hole and out the building.

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They were lounging around outside till everyone was looked at and accounted for. Buck took a little while to sit next to Ali , he was next to get checked out. He only remembered his hands when she grabbed one to thank him. He let out a hiss and Eddie’s head shot up from the next row over. He came over and grabbed the tips of the gloves.

“Let me see Buck. When did you hurt them?” he asked as he carefully peeled the gloves off revealing deep slashes in both palms.

“When you went out the window.” He gritted out.

“That was hours ago and you didn’t say anything , you could have injured them worse.” Eddie scolded him as he waved an EMT over.

Once they were both looked over , Buck getting both hands bandaged as Eddie glared at him , they went to the truck to retrieve their phones. Buck carefully held his and swiped it on. There was an audible ding as a message from Maddie popped up , followed by another and another.

“Hey service is working again. “ He told Eddie who promptly tried to contact Christopher.

“Let me give you a ride.” Buck told Eddie after they made it back to the station. He knew Eddie had walked to work that morning.

They drove in silence to Christopher’s school , Eddie had already gotten ahold of them to let them know he was on his way. It had been such a long day with so much happening , with the earthquake and Buck too. He was just ready to get his son and go home. They pulled up and Eddie turned to Buck before he opened the door , Christopher standing inside the building behind him.

“Thank you Buck for saving my ass today , but if you ever hurt yourself doing it again I’m kicking your ass.” He said as he pulled Buck over the center into a hug.

He held him for a second then let go , smiling and climbing out the truck. He practically ran into the building hitting his knees as he dropped to hug his son. Christopher was laughing at his antics and he was glad that he seemed unaffected by the day’s events. He scooped him up and spun him around.

“Who’s that Dad?” Christopher asked him as he sat him down.

“That…that’s my friend.” Eddie told him turning to look with a smile on his face at Buck through the door.

Buck sat in the car waiting for them to come out so he could take them home. He’d never admit to anyone , but he was tearing up watching Eddie with his son. This was what he had dreamed of when he married Doug. Not the terror and pain that he had ended up with. Maybe one day he would get this , his dream come true.

 

WELL NOT SURE IF IT’S BETTER THAN WHAT I HAD BEFORE I DROPPED MY LAPTOP AND LOST IT , BUT HERE IT IS….


	3. Stuck

Eddie heard the alarm go off for the second time , knowing he couldn’t ignore it any longer he rolled over and smacked it off. With a sigh he ran his hands through his hair as he lay there for another minute. That was the third dream he had since the earthquake two days ago. He’d been on an off rotation just like the rest of the shift and every night or morning there was a dream.

He got out of bed pulling the pajamas off he slept in along with the underwear. You’d think he was fifteen not twenty-five. He jumped in the shower , scrubbing the dried cum out his pubic hair just like he had to yesterday morning. This was getting out of hand. He dressed and checked on Christopher , he was just getting up , having shut off his own big boy alarm and getting ready to get his clothes. He was on an independence kick lately and damn if it didn’t both warm and break his heart at the same time.

Eddie Diaz had known since he was thirteen that he like both girls and boys. When he was with his friends and Hector Gonzales had swiped his dad’s playboy to show off he had found himself excited by the women. When his cousin gave him his first porno two days later to show up Hector he found that he was just as attracted to the men as the women.

They went through the morning routine , a light workout together in the living room , Christopher laughing when he called him his Superman. They got dressed for the day , Eddie having to hold himself back from putting Christopher’s sock on for him when he saw him struggle. They had breakfast , cereal where he watched as his son poured his own. Then they loaded up in the truck and headed to Eddie’s Abuela’s house to drop Christopher off. They had yet to reopen the school since there was still a bit of cleanup to do along some of the routes the buses ran so he would stay with her for the day.

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They pulled up running a little late so Eddie lifted Christopher out the truck placing him on the ground with a kiss as he walked to the door to knock while Christopher made his way up the walk. He smiled as he walked all on his own toward the porch. Eddie couldn’t be prouder of him , he was the best thing that had ever happened to him , even if it had happened way too young.

“Eddito.” His Abuela says as she comes out the door , planting a kiss on his cheek.

“Hey , thanks for watching him today.”

“Any time mijo.” She says and turns toward Christopher.

“Go help him!” she smacks Eddie’s arm.

“He can do it , he wants to do it on his own.” Eddie tells her rubbing his arm.

“Alright , go to work we will have fun today don’t worry.”

Eddie climbs in the truck watching for a moment before he backs out the drive and heads to the station. Now that he has dropped Christopher off for the day he can spend the ride thinking about the source of his problem dreaming , Buck….shit what was his last name anyway. Shaking his head to get back on track he sighs.

Leave it to him to fall for the straight guy. The straight guy who sometimes looked at him or said something that , for a tiny moment in time , gave him hope that he wasn’t straight. But he wasn’t that lucky at all , never had been. First there had been his parents finding him with Victor Sanchez , that did not go over well , hence the non-existent relationship. Then he had met Shannon at a party four months before graduation , one drunken night and nine months later Christopher Anthony Diaz was born , they had been married by then of course. When Christopher had been only a few months old Eddie had been deployed overseas , which was about the time they learned that he had Cerebral Palsy. He took another tour then another to hide from that harsh truth , but then he couldn’t run anymore.

When Christopher turned four Shannon had left , one note telling him that she couldn’t handle the challenges raising him alone anymore. He had been out of the service by then thankfully and he had leaned on family for help , they loved Christopher to death. Now here he was crushing on the straight guy he would never have , the one he was sure had some issues himself if the way he had flinched that day in the gym was any indication.

He pushed thoughts of Buck out his head the best he could as he pulled into the station , ironically parking next to him. he grabbed his gear and headed in to clock in. He waved to everyone as he made his way to his locker to dump his stuff , not seeing the object of his affections. He just finished putting his stuff away and headed to the bathroom when out of the showers on the other side of the bathroom stepped none other than Buck. Wrapping the towel around his waist as he faced the other way not seeing Eddie , but giving him a glimpse of slightly pale ass cheek. Unfortunately Eddie was walking when this happened and he proceeded to walk straight into the open stall door.

“Son of a bitch!” he yelled as his face hit the door.

“Whoa you scared the shit outta me man.” Buck said laughing a little with his hand over his chest.

“Sorry wasn’t watching where I was going.” Eddie said as he held his nose , he didn’t think he did any damage.

“Let me see.” Buck said as he secured the towel and walked toward Eddie.

Just what he needed , naked Buck up close and personal. He stood there pinching his nose as Buck came closer. He had to admit Eddie had scared the shit out of him. He was still wary about showering at the station , but with having to drive his sister to work his morning routine had been all screwed up. His nervousness to shower in front of the team came from his time with Doug. All that time hiding the bruises made him fearful of showing too much of himself , even though he knew the bruises had long since faded there were still scars.

“It doesn’t look broken.” Buck told him as he gently felt his nose.

“Well , thank god for small miracles.” Eddie muttered.

“What had you so distracted anyway?” Buck asked reaching for another towel and rubbing his hair dry.

“Oh I was…uh…thinking about…” he stuttered out before being interrupted by the alarm.

“Shit!” Buck exclaimed turning to his clothes and dropping the towel. Eddie wisely chose to turn and run to the truck before anything else happened to him.

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The call was of a guy that had been on the roof top of a building doing night security and had fallen between two buildings trying to chase some thieves. They had to crash a private showing of an apartment to bust through a wall to pull the poor guy into the building. Once inside the poor guy was thankfully only scraped up a little where he had slid down the harsh exterior of the building.

“The only time having a gut could save my life.” The guy laughed as they wheeled him to the ambulance.

“Ok pack it up we got another call.” Bobby said.

Turns out the next call was a crazy one. There were a few bars around L.A. that had reputations , Saddle Ranch was one of them. It was a themed redneck ranch bar that was frequented by girls who wore tight jeans , daisy dukes and rode the mechanical bull like Lane Frost. The guys were of the jacked up four wheel drive variety that spent equal amounts of time checking out the other trucks and watching the girls riding the bull.

“Well , this is your type of place ain’t it Buck?” Chim asked as they pulled up behind the ambulance outside.

“Not really.” Buck said.

“Come on filled with women in short shorts getting drunk , get real man.” Chim nudged him with his elbow as they climbed out and made their way to the door.

Buck sighed as he trudged behind the rest of them. One day they were gonna look at him and see him , not playboy sex addict Buck. Logically he knew that telling them he was gay and had a husband would set them straight , but if this is what they thought about him now , what would they think of him after he told them he had lied about the women.

“She’s over here.” A group of girls come rushing up to them as Buck brushes past them with the saw.

“Holy crap you are hot!” one exclaims as he passes her and he catches Chim laughing out the corner of his eye. He just purses his lips , clenching his jaw tight and walks on.

They walk through the bar , Buck in the lead stomping angrily past flocks of girls catcalling at him and the rest of the guys. The girl leading him jokes about the strippers being there and Buck tells himself that gay or not he can’t hit a woman. They come out in an alleyway/back courtyard type space to find a crowd gathered around a jacked up orange truck that looks like it’s never seen mud or work.

“Ok clear a path , back up please.” Buck growls at the women turning to fawn over him.

Once they do they see a girl kneeling on the ground with her head in this massive tailpipe. What the hell are these idiots thinking? They shouldn’t be allowed to drink , Buck thinks as he sits on the ground and lays on his back to crawl under to get a better look.

“What’s her name?” Bobby asks.

“Betty.” A shaved head douche answers.

“Jennifer.” Comes the voice out the tailpipe.

“Oh I thought you meant my truck.”

“No , no one cares about that. “ Eddie says dropping the two by fours he carried.

“It’s not like I ran her over.” The guy says.

“You dared her to do it you ass.” One of the girls says.

“We were flirting.”

“Wow , no wonder you’re single.” Buck says as he scoots closer.

Eddie just shakes his head , if this is dating nowadays he doesn’t want to crack his head in this shallow gene pool. He walks over and kneels next to Buck as Hen starts poking around the girls head. He goes to lean closer to help Buck inspect the pipe in case they have to cut it and misses the bumper with his hand , falling onto Bucks stomach instead before he catches himself with his hand on the ground.

“Oof.” Buck huffs and tenses his stomach to help hold Eddie up. He catches Eddie’s eye as he blushes.

“You ok there?” he asks.

“Yeah pretty good except the whole stuck in a tail pipe thing.” The girls answers , which makes Eddie smile and just nod at Buck.

“Ok get the saw we can chop the end off and then get it off her head.” Bobby tells them as Buck stands up with a hand from Eddie.

Suddenly there’s a girl and a phone shoved in his face. He rears back like she was gonna hit him or stab him. He coughs a little as he covers up the instinctive reaction. He’s still not used to things coming at him. Phones especially , there was one Christmas that Doug threw a phone at him and broke his nose and cut him below his eye.

“Just type you’re number in my phone and I’ll text you.” She says still holding the phone out to him.

Chim and Hen are laughing while Bobby is trying to console the idiot who’s only worried about his truck. Eddie however is looking at him with the concerned look on his face. Buck turns away before he can give him anything else to look for.

“No thanks , I have a girlfriend.” He tells her , at least it keeps the girls away.

“Are you sure?” she says as she runs her hand up his chest , he looks around for help but there is none. Chim and Hen are under the truck , Bobby is talking to the guy and Eddie is kneeling down to help fit the jacket around the girl so she doesn’t get his with any flying metal sparks.

“Yeah I really need to focus on this so I can help make sure they cut the pipe and not your friends head off.” He back away from her and steps to the side where Eddie is standing up , feeling like a wimp for needing Eddie as a shield.

“Hey do you have snap chat?” the other girl leans toward Eddie showing off her cleavage and damn if this place isn’t getting dangerous.

“No , I don’t and even if I did , I’m not what you’re looking for. I have a son.” Buck looks at him wondering if he never dates because of Christopher , cause really he deserves to be happy too.

“Oh I do too , that’s great.” She responds and Eddie can’t believe someone with a kid would be out at this place in the middle of the day.

After that Chim backs the crowd up , they need to get this girl out and get gone before one of them gets jumped. Hen holds the girl’s head still while Bobby saws through the pipe. Once it’s through they help her stand , now to just get it off her.

“I need some lube.” Hen calls.

“Oh I’ve got some.” Mom girl pulls some out her purse and hands it to Chim who tosses it to Buck. He does his best not to grimace at the thought of where it had been , thank god for gloves and hand sanitizer.

Buck pours it in the top of the pipe while Eddie rubs it as close to her head as possible without thinking about a different scenario involving Buck , lube and his fingers. Finally they can pull the pipe off her head and she seems to be fine. If not a little wasted , she comments on how hot they are and proceeds to giggle at Bobby when he tells her the warning signs she needs to get to a hospital for. Eddie and Buck walk off toward the truck stripping the gloves as they go.

“Hey is your son really the reason you don’t date?” Buck asks.

“That and they really weren’t my type.” Eddie says with a smile.

“Yeah mine either. Not anymore. But I’m talking about in general.”

“It’s complicated when you have a kid.” Eddie tells him.

“Of course it is , but that’s kind of a cop out.”

“You live in your invisible girlfriend’s house. Isn’t that a cop out?” Eddie asks a little harshly.

Buck feels the sting of that and ducks his head. He was using her as an excuse , just not the way Eddie was thinking. Either way he didn’t like lying to him , but he should have backed off. He felt his hands shake at the thought that Eddie was mad at him. He could deal with the others cause he had been around them long enough to know how they reacted. He hadn’t had much experience with an angry Eddie. He started to wring the gloves in his hands as he swallowed down the fear and bile that threatened to rise.

“Yeah…what?! Which one?” Eddie answered his phone and promptly walked off. It was enough to bring Buck out of his panic.

“Everything ok?” he asked as they reached the truck.

“I gotta get to the hospital.” Eddie told him.

“Hey Cap can you drop me and Eddie off at the hospital on the way back?” Buck yelled to Bobby.

“Sure just be back as soon as you can.” He said looking between him and Eddie.

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“You didn’t have to come.” Eddie told him as they rode the elevator.

“It’s no problem.” Buck replied.

They got off on the third floor and walked toward the waiting area. There was a woman sitting there staring off in the other direction. Eddie motioned to her and Buck followed behind looking around for Christopher. He spotted him talking to some nurses , a charmer like his father.

“What happened?” he asked the woman when they reached her.

“Your grandmother lost her balance and fell. She’s getting too old to be babysitting for you. Christopher called 911 and got her help.”

“I know , I’m looking for something more permanent but they have more red tape then the VA.” Eddie told her.

“I’ll take him tonight , but you gotta get it figured out.” She told him.

“I know. Aunt Tia this is Buck from work.” He introduced them.

“I thought maybe he was your new…”

“TIA!” he cut her off definitely didn’t need her telling Buck that he liked men too.

“Friend. “ she finished after he was done. Buck just looked between them , lost and feeling it.

“I’m going to check on him then we can go.” Eddie told Buck.

“No problem.” He smiled.

“You behave.” He kissed his aunt and walked over to Christopher.

“He tries so hard , ever since that girl left things have been hard. As much as we love Christopher , we have no love for the woman that bore him.” she told Buck.

“That must suck , my dad kinda disowned me so I kinda know the feeling.” Buck told her.

“I just hope that one day he stops pretending and starts being who he is , he’ll be a lot happier.” They watched as Eddie spun Christopher around giving him a kiss before putting him back down.

Buck loved watching Eddie with his son , he was everything that he had wished Doug was. He was so busy smiling at Eddie he failed to notice the look Eddie’s aunt was giving him. Eddie finished his goodbyes and came back over. With a kiss and a hug to his aunt they were out the door , Eddie stressing about Christopher’s care and Buck thinking he had the perfect solution.

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The next day Eddie woke up dreading. He had had yet another dream about Buck and he woke to a voicemail from his aunt saying she wouldn’t be able to get out of work today and he had nowhere to take Christopher. He got up and got dressed dreading calling in.

“Hello?” Buck answered the station phone when he called.

“Hey Buck is Cap around , I got a problem.”

“No , what’s the problem?” Buck asked anxiously.

“My aunt can’t get off and I have nowhere to take Christopher. I don’t think I’ll be able to come in.”

“Nonsense , bring him here.”

“Are you sure?” Eddie asked.

“Yes now get that ass in gear before you’re late.” Buck hung up on him.

So he got the both of them ready and drove into work. Christopher was excited to be going to work with him. He loved hearing about his job each night and was over the moon to get to be there with him. He pulled in and helped Christopher out and into the station. Everyone gathered around the couch and introduced themselves to Christopher and made him feel welcomed.

“Who’s this , I don’t remember asking for any new recruits?” Bobby asked walking up.

“This is my son Christopher , my aunt is trying to get off work to get him I …” Eddie jumped up explaining.

“Buck filled me in , he’s welcome here anytime.”

They spent the rest of the shift with Christopher playing pinball , riding in the truck to scenes and making fun of Chim for a change. Christopher took to everyone nicely , but more so to Buck. Eddie didn’t think his heart could handle it. His son was gonna be wiped out tonight that was for sure. He smiled at Buck as they were preparing to let him go down the pole , he and Buck were catching him at the bottom. He caught Buck’s eye and smiled at the joy on Christopher’s face as he came by. The fun and the moment was broken by his aunt coming around the truck , finally off to take Christopher with her. As Eddie walked them out he stopped and walked back , giving both Buck and Bobby a hug.

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“I feel so bad that Eddie has to worry about Christopher all the time , all this crap he has to wade through just to get him taken care of.” Buck told Maddie as they made dinner and poured wine.

“Well , what he needs is someone who knows the system. He has cerebral palsy right?” Maddie asked as they made their way to the couch with dinner.

“Yeah he was stuck in the birth canal or something , but the kid’s so damn great and independent. You should have seen the look on his face as he slid down the pole.” Buck gushes.

“So does this little crush mean you’re ready to tell them the truth?”

“Shut up. He’s straight , not a chance in hell.”

“Anyway , I found a great apartment across town. Got all the bells and whistles if you wanna join me , get them off your back about Abby.”

“I’ll think about it.”

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They rolled on a call at a mall , guy fell into an escalator. Buck wasn’t sure how he managed to fall , but he was sure it wasn’t pretty. They made their way up to the second floor to assess the situation. Apparently the guy had been riding the escalator up to his girlfriend and dropped to one to propose , but before he made it all the way up the flooring covering the machinery fell and he got caught in it.

“Oh please dear god save him!” the girlfriend pleaded.

“Ma’am we’re gonna do all we can.” Buck told her as he moved her back.

Chim jumped down to inspect the wounds the guy had , he was the smallest and it was a tight space. Hen and Bobby waited up top to give him anything they needed. Eddie was taking care of some business , he’d be back after shift to help Maddie move. Buck had invited him over early to talk. He had an idea how to help him get the services he needed for Christopher.

“It doesn’t look good Cap , the chain might have nicked the artery.” Chim told them.

“Ok get it cut and tied off and get him out of there.”

“I’m going to go help them ok , stay here.” Buck told her.

They pulled the guy up through the hole , Chim crawling up after him. Hen and Chim worked to get the bleeding stopped so they could transport him. Bobby held the guy’s hand while Buck moved people back to clear a path out of there.

“Di-did s-she say….y-y-yes?” the guy asked.

“Looks like she did.” Bobby told him , catching the ring pop on her finger.

The guy smiled. Buck remembered how he felt when Doug proposed. They had been to dinner at La Cozza Infuriata , which should have been an omen of things to come. Doug dropped down right there in the middle of the restaurant and asked Buck to be his one and only forever. Buck had cried as he said yes , he was always a romantic. If only his marriage had been that great.

Suddenly the guy was coughing up blood and coding on the stretcher. The girl started screaming and Buck ran to hold her back. Everyone jumped into motion. Buck knew it was over as soon as Hen looked at Chim and shook her head. Slowly he stopped CPR and backed away letting the woman come say her goodbyes. Buck felt his heart break , at the sound of her grief and the look on Chim’s face. He wondered if Doug would have ever sounded like that if he had succeeded in killing him.

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Buck opened the door when Eddie knocked on it. He was right on time of course. He smiled to himself like a dork , but he didn’t care. He was happy that he was going to be able to help Eddie like this. Especially that Christopher was going to be taken care of. He really liked that kid.

“Come in.” he waved Eddie in.

“So we’re helping your sister move right?” Eddie asked nervously glancing around when he saw no one else.

“Yeah in a bit , but right now I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“O-okay.” Eddie was nervous ,did Buck realize his feelings for him. Was he about to tell him off?

“I got someone I want you to meet.” Buck smiled at him.

“You didn’t set me up did you?” Eddie asked confused , he thought…he shook that thought away.

“No , trust me this woman is exactly what you need.” Buck told him as there was a knock on the door.

Buck turned to answer it with a huge smile on his face. For once he felt like he was doing the right thing. Sure he did stuff right on the job , but outside that he was kinda lost. At work they had rules and procedures , if not that then Bobby telling him what to do and when to do it. Off shift he was on his own and Doug had always told him he never did anything right.

“Buckaroo!” Carla yelled as he opened the door.

“Hey Carla.” He hugged her.

“Oh how I’ve missed you since Abby left. How’s life babe?” she pulled back and walked in.

“I’ve missed you too. I got someone I want you to meet.” He indicated to Eddie.

“Oh is this tall drink of water your..”

“My friend Eddie. Eddie this is Carla , L.A.’s finest home health care aid. She has years of experience with all the red tape , bureaucratic bullshit.” Buck said before she could out him , he had obviously told Carla on one of the many occasions they hung out after Abby left drinking wine and crying.

“Hi Carla.” Eddie said with a smile.

“I figured she could help you with Christopher , to get him everything you need so you don’t have to worry so much.”

“I am red tape’s worst nightmare. In no time at all we’ll have you all set up so you can have the time to do anything you like without worrying about your son.” Carla shot a look at Buck when she said anything.

“Now let’s go over all this and see what you’re working with.” She said as she turned to go to the dinning room.

“Thank you Buck , for thinking of Christopher like this.” Eddie said turning to hug him before joining Carla. Buck could only smile.

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Eddie took Christopher and Carla the next day , she was right it took no time at all , to introduce her to his Abuela. He felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. And it was all thanks to Buck , who’s last name was Buckley , he had finally looked at his turnout coat. He even remembered Chim calling him Evan that day in the gym.

He had a lot to thank Buck for. He had no idea how he was gonna thank him , although he knew how he would like to , but he knew that was out of the question. He sighed as he put Christopher on his lap so he could be closer to talk with her in the hospital bed. He really need to get the dreams under control or sleep naked or something. He was doing way more laundry than normal.

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“Are you sure you don’t wanna move in with me?” Maddie asked as they loaded her few things in Buck’s jeep.

“Yes I’m sure. For right now at least , I’m not ready to let go of the lie yet.” He told her.

“Just as long as you’re safe Buck. If I could find you he might be able to too.” She told him quietly.

“I know , but I’ll be fine.” He promised.

“If you say so. Maybe you should have offered to live with Eddie and be Christopher’s caretaker.” She laughed as he smacked her.

“Shut up sis.” Buck laughed.

If he was telling himself the truth he would offer to do just that. He loved hanging with Christopher , to see that smile light up his face. He wanted that so damn bad , but he was lucky enough to be a firefighter after being with Doug. He had made sure that he was helpless. No college and no friends or family to help him. He wanted him dependent on him so he would never be able to leave. Fortunately he had underestimated that Buckley spirit he had. One day he wouldn’t think of Doug so much and he couldn’t wait for that day to come.

 

GOD THIS STORY IS JUST FLYING OUT OF ME….GONNA BE SAD WHEN IT REACHES THE END OF THE SEASON AND I’M FORCED TO STOP….THEN AGAIN WE’LL ALL BE SAD AFTER THE SEASON FINALE….LOL..


	4. Dosed and Drugged

Buck stared at the doorway , tilting his head left then right. He just couldn’t see how they were gonna do it. He looked at Eddie , standing behind him his hand on his chin as he shook his head. Great he had no hope for him either. He loved his sister , really he did , but this was ridiculous.

“I think we have to take the door off the hinges.” Eddie said cocking his head to the side.

“Or just get the jaws of life.” Buck joked , Eddie was so damn adorable when he smiled wide at that.

“No ,we are not taking the door off Evan Buckley! I measured it twice it has to fit.” Maddie pointed at the door as though it would magically fit.

“Can’t you turn it somehow?” she pouted.

“But then the pizza will fall off.” Buck pointed to the stack of pizza on the couch.

“You put pizza on my brand new couch?” Maddie snapped grabbing the pizza and shooting a glare at Buck as she took them in the apartment.

“I put it on the plastic!” he yelled after her , Eddie could only chuckle at him.

“Ok , let’s flip it.” Eddie told him bending down to grab the couch , giving Buck a view down the neck of the shirt he had on under his open shirt.

Buck huffed and bent to grab his side. Sometimes Eddie was unintentionally a tease. If he didn’t know the guy was straight he’d bet everything that he was flirting sometimes. That and he seemed determined to wear the most provocative things around him , like those jeans that were currently hugging his ass.

“Pivot.” Eddie said as they moved toward the door way.

Buck just grunted as he did as he was told and lifted the couch a little higher. He could see the corner that was getting stuck on the frame and with a little turn it was clear. Eddie waited till he was clear of the door frame before pushing the rest of the couch through and together they sat it in Maddie’s new living room.

“Thank you guys for doing this on your day off.” She smiled at them , as if she wouldn’t have made Buck do it anyway.

“No problem , Pizza?” Eddie asked wiping his hands on his jeans.

“Kitchen , on the counter next to the plates.” She pointed.

“And beer?” Chim asked.

“Also kitchen , in the fridge.” She smiled at him.

Buck walked over to stand next to her as they watched the two of them head toward the kitchen. Buck of course was watching Eddie’s ass as he walked. Maddie turned to him with this gossip girl look on her face.

“He is so cute.” She pointed toward the kitchen.

“I know he gets that a lot , but if you think he’s cute you should meet his kid. He’s so amazing.” Buck smiled softly at the thought of Christopher.

“Wait , Chimney has a kid?” Maddie looked at Buck in confusion.

“No , I thought you were talking about Eddie.”

“No , I wasn’t crushing in your man , Ev.” She laughed.

“Well ,it wouldn’t be the first time it happened.” He mumbled.

“Oh my god that was seventh grade and that was the only time. “ she gave him a look.

“I know , but still it scared me for the rest of my life.” He placed his hand on his chest dramatically.

“Wait , Chimney?”

Maddie just smiled and left him standing there to go join the other two in the kitchen , where Chim had put some pizza on a plate and a beer next to it for her. She smiled at him as Buck came in the room looking between the two of them suspiciously. He was protective of his sister , but Chim was also his friend. He walked over to stand next to Eddie who slid a plate and beer over to him. He looked up and smiled at Eddie.

“Thanks man.” He told him as he bit into his pizza.

“No problem.” Eddie said and they all finished their meal before finishing moving Maddie in.

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They pulled up on the scene behind the two patrol cars , one of them Athena. There on the bleachers of the field sat the helicopter , blades kicking up dirt and dust. Buck liked helicopters , just not when they were trying to decapitate people. The news chopper had had an issue and the pilot tried to land her safely , but he had failed. Buck spotted the news channel 8 logo on the side and realized that had to be Taylor Kelly , she did the traffic and helped him get work each morning.

“The pilot radioed for help before he went down , looks like he tried for that field over there.” Athena yelled over the sound of the rotors.

“Yeah well , he missed.”

“Get out of there people , move back!” Athena yelled moving toward the small crowd of people huddled under a pavilion , recording it.

“Ok , let’s go around the back of the bleachers. Eddie once we extract the victims you think you can shut it down?!” Bobby asked.

“I think so , but I’m worried about the dynamic rollover.” Eddie fidgeted with is gloves to cover up the slight tremor , the sound of the helicopter trying to drag him back to Afghanistan.

“The what?!” Buck yelled from over his shoulder.

“When you take people out the weight changes and it can cause the helicopter to tip. That would make the blades strike the ground , shear off and become projectiles.”

Bobby , Eddie and Buck ran along the building to the other side of the bleachers. There was a small space to safely crawl up onto them and Bobby went first. When it was Buck’s turn he stumbled a little and felt Eddie grab his waist to steady him. He looked over his shoulder to see Eddie shaking his head. Once they were all on the bleachers they moved toward the doors of the helicopter.

“Buck get her out of there!” Bobby yelled and pointed to the woman in the back seat.

“On it Cap.” Buck yanked open the door and reached in for her.

Bobby and Eddie worked on freeing the pilot who seemed to have had a medical emergency and was unconscious. Buck grabbed her in a bridal carry , but before he could pull her out the helicopter shifted throwing her to the other side , Buck managing to hang on to a leg. A few of the others made it to the bleachers and helped stabilize the helicopter.

Buck pulled the woman to the edge of the seat again and scooped her in his arms. He got her clear and to Hen and Chim. Turning to look back he saw Bobby grab the pilot and Eddie slip into the seat before the change of weight could register. He watched in awe as Eddie shut the helicopter down with no further problems before turning to help Hen while Chim took care of the pilot.

“Everything looks good , we can lose the o2.” Hen said as Buck checked her eyes with the pen light.

“How are you doing?” he asked.

“Alright , scared to death still I think , but other than that great.”

“Can you do a me a small favor , can you say ‘Traffic is backed up on the 405’?” Buck asked her.

“Really Buck.” Hen stared at him.

“I just know her voice , listen on the radio each morning.” Buck ducked his head , great they thought he was flirting with her.

“Really didn’t know I had such a heroic fan.” She smiled slyly at him.

Hen and Athena walked off shaking their heads and Buck felt frustrated. He was just making conversation , trying to make her feel better and get her mind off what happened and they thought he was flirting. He would never be taken seriously , never be thought of as anything other than a horn dog. Really that hurt , he was never more uncomfortable in his own skin , not since he had come out at least. He had even had a healthy sex drive before Doug had beat that out of him. He regretted ever showing any interest in those women when he started working at the 118. He was so damn stupid to have tried to be what they thought he was , he was never gonna be him with them.

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Back at the station Buck jumped off the truck , leaving the teasing behind about his conversation with the Taylor Kelly and went straight for the car wash supplies. He pulled the Captain’s truck around the side and got to work. He always cleaned when he was stressed and damn it he was stressed now. No it was more than that , he was hurt and upset and pissed off. He hosed down the truck , ignoring the stares of Chim and Hen , ignoring Eddie who had changed into workout clothes and seemed to be doing his own version of avoidance.

“This is gonna be so great , finally get me out of that chopper and into a real news van.” Buck looked up and spotted Taylor Kelly walking in the station , a cameraman trailing behind her.

“Excuse me.” Bobby said as he walked over , they were open to the public in case someone needed help , but not for people to just come in to come in.

“Captain Nash , I’m Taylor Kelly. You guys pulled me out a helicopter a few hours ago.”

“I know who you are , may I ask what you are doing here?” Buck looked at his watch , damn he had zoned out.

“Oh they haven’t called and told you yet , really with how fast this got thrown together I’m surprised you don’t know yet.”

Chim came up to the railing and yelled to Bobby that he had a phone call. Buck went back to washing the truck , he had a bad feeling about this. He looked over at Eddie and saw that he was drenched in sweat. Damn he was gonna have to hose himself down in a minute.

“Hey you’re the one who pulled me out right , the big fan?” She said as she spotted Buck and he walked over tossing the sponge in the bucket.

“Yes ma’am.” Buck glanced quickly at the others , trying to ignore the snickers from them.

“I wanted to thank you again for getting me out of there.” She looked at him and bit her lip a little.

“How are you feeling , any side effects?” Eddie asked dropping the weights and walking over.

“No , I’m feeling great thanks to you guys , all of you. That’s why I’m here actually , I wanted to do a story that highlights you , the heroes of 118.” She smiled at all of them.

“So you have some serious pull Mrs. Kelly , I’m to give you whatever you need.” Bobby said as he walked back out.

Shit , Buck thought. This was the last thing he needed , another story putting his face out there to let Doug know where he was. He looked at everyone else , at least he wasn’t the only one that didn’t look overjoyed at the idea of being filmed. Taylor smiled and winked at him and he tried to return the smile , tried to be polite , but all he could manage was a grimace.

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Buck spent as much time washing the trucks as possible , he didn’t want to be on camera. But eventually he ran out of things to wash. Hen was in the ambulance straightening up , Bobby avoiding Taylor in his office , Eddie had hit the showers and damn if Buck didn’t want to join him. Thinking of the water sluicing off his abs was driving him crazy. He walked up to grab some muffins or something off the table , they had received tons of gifts since they had saved the news crew this morning. He grimaced as he saw Taylor filming Chim talking about the love they got from the people who sent them food.

“It’s the carbs.” Buck told him with a snort after Chim had said the ‘love’ kept them going.

Buck snuck off to a corner to eat his muffin and watch the others do their piece for the camera. Chim was acting all suave and debonair. Hen had a serious sob story about why she became a firefighter. He had never heard that story. Taylor corned Eddie at the punching bag , Buck noted that he was in workout mode more today than he had ever seen him , calendar prep included. There must be something bothering him and Buck wished he could help him deal with it.

“I missed the camaraderie I had in the army , the brotherhood. That’s why I became a firefighter , that and after all I saw over there all I wanted to do was save lives.” Eddie muttered.

“What was your time like over there?” she asked him.

“That’s not up for discussion.” Eddie said walking off.

Taylor looked around , eyes lighting up when she spotted Buck. He swallowed and tried to keep the muffin down. Maybe he could give her just a little bit , make her happy and get her off his back. Then he could go back to hiding away. He squared his shoulders and took a deep breath , grabbing a rag and wiping down the equipment on the side of the truck , it kept him from giving his full face to the camera.

“So Buck , right , how did you become a firefighter?” She asked , smirk in place.

“I kinda just fell into it you know.” He mumbled , the alarm cutting off any other questions.

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They rolled up on an eating contest , person having difficulty breathing. Buck liked these things , the human body was an amazing thing and it was cool to see the different ways it could be pushed to it’s limits.

“I was told there was a man here who was choking to death?” Bobby asked as they pulled up and got out , greeted by an older woman.

“Oh , Gregory said he doesn’t want help now. He’s doing fine.”

“Still gotta see him.” Bobby said and motioned them on.

“I wonder how many he put down , last year’s record was 74 hot dogs.” Buck said excitedly. Everyone just stared at him , before continuing on after Bobby.

“Sir are you refusing care , I need to know for our records?” Bobby asked the guy , who only waved his hand in their direction before flopping over out his chair.

“Hen , Chim get in there and tell me what we got. Buck , Eddie get the crowd back so we have room to work.” Bobby ordered.

Buck and Eddie walked over to the end of the tables where the crowd was trying to peek around. They pushed them back with hands outstretched , fingers brushing each other occasionally. Once the crowd was moved back they walked back to the tables to watch. Before they got there though there was a hiss and a komodo crawled out from under table , making Buck and Eddie grab each other and jump back.

“What the hell?!” Buck exclaimed.

“Oh he’s the prize , a komodo.” The little woman told them , Buck looked at Eddie noticing they still had ahold of each other. He coughed and dropped his hands , tapping Eddie’s when he didn’t notice , still staring at the dragon.

“His airway’s blocked!” Hen said as she tried to get him oxygen.

Chim handed her some weird forceps , but before she could get them in his mouth crickets were crawling out and jumping away. Buck shivered , he could do a lot of things , bugs were a no. Hen reached in and pulled out a ball of chewed crickets. The guy coughed and looked around at them.

“All this for a big lizard?” Eddie asked.

“And 500 bucks , but I lost.”

The other two contestants lost too , the woman running the contest happy to keep the lizard , Claude. Buck just looked on in revulsion. There was no idea what the prize was , he wasn’t eating bugs. That shit was sick. He caught Eddie’s eye and rolled his and nodded at the contestants. Eddie just smiled at him. Eddie went to help load up and Buck looked around , catching Taylor Kelly looking at him , an odd look on her face.

He made it through the rest of the shift , managing to dodge Taylor. She had bigger fish to fry anyway , Bobby was also avoiding her like the plague , Buck could guess why. The boss was always tight lipped about his past and he didn’t like the fact that the camera was following them to calls , exposing the victims and jeopardizing their trust in the LAFD.

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The next morning was quiet , he had gave up after six hours of sleep , all the worries about this news special reaching Doug keeping him up. He rolled in about twenty minutes early , he had tried to go slower , but it hadn’t worked. He sat on the couch , glad that Taylor Kelly wasn’t here yet and watched the others arrive. The only one who had beaten him here was Cap , which wasn’t unusual , he had to go over things with the previous shift before. Unfortunately it wasn’t long after everyone got there , including Taylor , that they got a call out to muscle beach for a contest , what was with them lately?

Buck hopped out the truck , his bag over his shoulder and looked around. There was a stage set up and a few buff guys were gathered to the side , but in the middle of the stage was their vic. He was stuck in a double bicep pose , his muscles taut and glistening with oil. He was sporting a grimace , fighting to breathe through the pain and a pair of short boy shorts. Buck was never into huge muscles , good thing too cause if Doug had had them he would be dead or really , really fucked up.

“Just stay calm sir , we’re gonna get you help.” Bobby told him as he walked up , Taylor and her camera right behind.

“Ok , it really hurts.”

“When was the last time you ate or drank?” Hen asked as they started taking vitals.

“Yesterday , was trying to make the muscles pop.”

“Well you did that , you’re dehydrated and that’s made the muscles contract.”

“What does that mean?” Buck asked.

“He’s having a whole body Charlie horse.” Chim looked up at them.

“Ouch man one kills me.”

“Listen we can stop it by giving you fluids , but I need to know if you’re taking anything?” Bobby looked over at the camera pointed in the guy’s face.

“No , steroids? No way man.” The guy says.

“You guys need to back up for me.” He tells Taylor , who huffs but does as she’s told.

“Let’s move it.” Eddie ushers them back.

“Ok listen if you are on something and I give you fluids your kidneys will shut down.”

“Yes , I’m dosing!”

“Ok , anything else?”

“I took a diuretic last night , shed some water weight.”

“Ok let’s get him moved.” Bobby tells them.

Hen and Chim move back to let Buck and Eddie get to the guy. Bobby brings the back board up behind him and waits for them to strap the guy to it. Once he’s secured Buck and Eddie take a side each and lower him back so they can carry him to the ambo.

“You think he’d get a trophy for holding that pose for so long.” Chim says and Hen just smacks him.

“Captain can we get a few words from you?” Taylor ambushes Bobby before he can leave the stage.

“Sure , I got a few. Stop shoving the camera at people who are in distress , it makes them lie to us and we lose their trust. That leads to help being administered incorrectly or not at all because people are embarrassed to tell us what’s wrong.” Bobby tells her and walks off.

“Damn.” The cameraman says.

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They made it back to the station and crawled out. Buck finished stowing his gear and headed up to the kitchen , he was hungry. He looked over at the table with favors on it and debated if he really wanted sweets. He rummaged in the fridge , finding nothing and walked back to the table with an array of cakes and goodies. He spotted a new plastic tub and popped the lid off it , brownies YES.

“Hey those look good.” Eddie said coming up behind him and putting his chin on his shoulder , reaching his arm around to grab one.

“T-they are.” Buck stuttered out , feeling arousal shoot through him , turning his head slightly so they were nearly touching cheeks.

“Don’t hog them.” Hen came up breaking the moment.

Buck handed her the container and walked off to take a seat away from them. He could feel the warmth of Eddie still on his back. He had missed little things like that , the small intimacies with other people. He finished his fifth brownie , they really were good , and watched Eddie eat his third. He had to turn away though when he started licking his fingers clean.

Staring at the wall , trying to get the image out his head he felt his body flush warm. Of course he was thinking about Eddie so that wasn’t unusual. Bobby came and grabbed one , apparently the last one and Buck started to feel kinda floaty. It was a new feeling , weird and kinda nice at the same time. Chim came up and headed straight for the empty container , Taylor and her henchmen filming all the while as Chim mourned the loss of the brownies. Suddenly the alarm rang and they all kinda floated to the truck.

On the way to the call Buck was next to Eddie feeling his heat pressing against his side. It was nice and pleasant , nothing like Doug he thought bitterly. Eddie was sure there was something wrong. He felt high , not that he had ever been really , but he figured this was what it felt like. Only he wasn’t sure you were supposed to be this damn horny. He could feel his cock pressing against his pants and damn did he want to free it , preferably into Buck.

They arrived at a hotel , everyone but Chim tripping on the way in , to find a beauty pageant of toddlers and a mom with a high heel in her face. Buck looks at the little girls adorably and thinks that he would love to have one of them , that looks like Eddie with dark curls and dimples. He looks around to find Eddie and sees a man moving through the crowd. All at once he’s retreating till his back hits the wall , his breath coming in pants.

Eddie is in the middle of thinking how good it would feel to reach down and pop the clips off his pants , shove them to the floor till he’s naked. Then find Buck and fuck him against the wall , hand under his jaw holding him up while he drives into him as deep as he can , coming in that tight heat , finally making him his. He turns frantically looking for Buck , needing to do exactly that when he sees Buck backed against a wall.

“Please don’t Doug!” buck cries out , putting his hands up pleading.

Eddie makes his way over , the man that had been approaching Buck backs off and retreats to the other side of the room. Eddie watches Buck slide down the wall , tears falling down his cheeks as he looks only at the floor. He flinches when Eddie reaches him , only seeing his shoes.

“I didn’t mean to break the plate , I swear. Please don’t hurt me Doug.” Buck cowers before him , Eddie sits down next to him.

“It’s ok Buck , no one’s gonna hurt you ever again babe.” Eddie coaxes him to his lap , running his hands through his hair.

Chim manages to figure out , with help from Athena of course , what happened. She handcuffs them so they don’t do any damage , Eddie freaking that he can’t use his hands to calm Buck. Buck had gone eerily silent , with tears running down his face and his entire body shaking. Eddie scooted as close as he could murmuring nonsense to Buck as he pressed against his side in support. His own issues , the intense arousal , had dissipated at the sight of Buck terrified.

They were taken Buck’s , not that Eddie wanted to go home to Christopher like this , thankfully Carla was watching him. Chim gets them settled , leaving once he’s sure they won’t try to go out the window or some shit like that. Eddie sits on the couch looking at Buck , who has calmed down and is currently staring at his hands in his lap.

“You want to talk about it?” Eddie whispers.

“Not really. How are you doing?”

“Better now , after things got scary I was good.”

“How did it affect you , were you seeing stuff from your tours?” Buck glanced at him when he huffed out a laugh.

“No , mine was a little more…erotic in nature.”

“Wait , so I eat the trippy brownies and see terrifying things and you eat them and have fantasies?”

“Well , it’s not like I can control it. Apparently getting high makes me horny.” Eddie shrugged.

“I’m sure I’ll be fine if you want to go take care of that…I mean not like by yourself…no that’s not what I meant either. You know , go pick up a girl.”

“No , I don’t do casual. Besides the person I was thinking of won’t ever be with me like that so I’ll pass.” Eddie said sadly.

“Think we should sleep it off?” Buck asked , leaning slightly toward Eddie.

“I don’t think I could sleep right now.” Eddie told him , feeling the effects again now that Buck was alright.

“Oh is it….is it getting to you again?” Buck whispered.

“Yeah , they should market this shit for Viagra.” Eddie joked , shifting restlessly.

“Look we’re dudes , we’ve been drugged. I think that it’s cool if you have to head to the bathroom and take care of it.”

“Buck…you can’t say things like that.” Eddie whispered , heart aching and turned to face forward clenching his hands on his lap.

“What are you saying?” Buck scooted closer , his leg warming Eddie’s as he pressed close.

“You don’t want to know , you’ll hate me.” Eddie closed his eyes to hold the tears at bay.

“I could never hate you , you are an amazing person. The way you are with Christopher , how good a firefighter you are , everything about you is perfect.”

Suddenly Eddie grabbed Buck’s shoulder with one hand , the other fitting around the back of his head and twisting Buck to face him. Before Buck could say anything Eddie was crashing their lips together , bringing his other hand up on the other side of his face. Eddie kissed him frantically , as though his life depended on it , licking the seam of his lips and plunging his tongue in when Buck’s parted in a gasp. He molded their chest together and let out a filthy moan. His cock throbbed in his jeans and he wished they were naked , that he was fucking the tight heat of Buck.

Buck was in shock , he had to be still tripping some serious balls. There was no way this was really happening. He knew that Eddie would never be kissing him if it wasn’t for the drugs. Doug had told him time and time again that no one would ever want him , not even just as a hole to fuck. He brought his hands up and gently pushed Eddie back , his heart breaking as he did.

“Eddie stop.” Buck said once he was able to put space between them.

“Oh god…I…” Eddie said as his eyes widened and he realized what he had done.

Before Buck could say anything Eddie was up off the couch and heading for the door. He knew he shouldn’t have done that , with his drugged brain though his control was shit. He felt his heart racing as he thought just how bad he fucked up , it breaking at the thought of losing the connection he had with Buck over this.

“Eddie where are you going?” Buck asked as he reached the door.

“I have to go.” Eddie said and was out the door.

Buck stood there wondering what the hell had just happened. He should go after Eddie , convince him to come back so they could talk about it. But the thought of going out there petrified him. Doug could be out there , waiting to take him home. After he beat the shit out of him of course , if he survived that. He felt like he was being torn in two , one side fearful of Doug and the other guilty that he wasn’t going after Eddie , telling him that he was ok , they were ok.

Hours later the LSD wore off , Maddie came over to tell him that they had found who had dosed them , that little lady with the lizard. She thought they could relax a little. Bobby had been on the roof hallucinating his dead daughter , with Taylor Kelly below filming the whole damn thing. Buck knew that he couldn’t let her air that , it would destroy Bobby and he didn’t deserve that. So instead of going to Eddie and working that out , he went to the studio hoping to catch Taylor.

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She was standing outside a news van when he got there. No surprise there , she was ruthless. He walked over , trying to ignore the ‘I’m going to eat you’ look she had. He was doing this for Bobby , he had to be strong. He plastered a smile on his face as he reached her.

“So they gave you a van?” Buck asked.

“You know it , you guys were gold.” She smiled.

“You can’t air that stuff with Bobby , it’ll destroy him.” Buck pleaded.

“What are you offering for his footage?” she smirked.

“You are heartless you know that.”

“It comes with the job sweetie. I’ve wanted to be a reporter since I was fourteen. I’m not doing that by reporting the traffic and if this is how I have to get where I want to be , then so be it. Now what is it going to be?”

“Fine.” Buck gritted out , bile churning in his stomach at the thought.

She only smirked and hooked a finger over her shoulder as she turned and walked off. Buck had practice with having sex when he didn’t want to , Doug wasn’t always accepting of no. He didn’t like him to just lay there either. So he made it through the experience , not unscathed , but at least Bobby would be safe. He left her and went straight home to have the hottest shower he could , scraping the filth off himself till the skin started to bead blood. He forced himself to stop after that.

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Eddie was terrified to go to work and face Buck now that he was sober. He had been up all night , worrying that he was losing the best thing that had ever happened to him. All because some lady had dosed them with LSD and he couldn’t keep his hands to himself. He walked in and sat on the couch after getting his stuff situated. He hadn’t run into Buck yet , but his hands were sweating and he was pretty sure his knees were shaking.

They all filed in and waited for the special to start. Buck appeared , but sat further away than necessary. The entire piece was great , she left out the LSD stuff thankfully. Eddie smiled as he listened to Buck talk , there wasn’t much of him compared to the rest of them , but that was alright. She even made Cap look good with the small piece she got from the muscle beach lecture he gave her. After it was over Buck jumped up and disappeared.

Eddie followed him and found him with Bobby. He stood outside and listened as they talked about the piece. How she had made Bobby look great and had left all the LSD out. Bobby looked so relieved that Eddie was reminded that things could have gone bad for more than just him. Bobby could have fallen or jumped off that roof or had the people turn their backs on him for being drugged.

“I wonder what made her change her mind about not using my drugged footage?” Bobby asked.

“I made sure she wouldn’t.” Buck said and he grit his teeth , jaw muscles popping as he strained them.

“Well , thanks. I think I’ll go watch it.” Bobby patted him on the back and left the room.

Once he was gone Buck put his head in his hands and Eddie watched as he started to shake. The sobs wracked his body , but never once did he make a sound. His hands clenched in his hair and Eddie got a look at the pure agony on his face. Decision made he strode in the room right over to Buck , who jumped up , and wrapped him in a bone crushing hug.

“I’m sorry that I did that last night and if you want me to leave I will , but I need you to know I’m sorry and I’m here if you ever need anything.” Eddie blurted out , his eyes streaming.

“Eddie , it’s not your fault , you were drugged. I never want you to leave , Christopher deserves to be happy and in one place.” Buck tentatively returned the hug.

“Do you need to talk?” Eddie asked.

“I think talking would make me feel a little better. There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you.” Buck starts , but the alarm going off cuts him off. With a shy smile they walk out to the truck , hopeful that things are gonna be alright.

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“Tonight we have a heartwarming special on the LAFD and the firefighters that make sure we are safe every day at the expense of their time and safety. Here’s the special by fox California reporter Taylor Kelly….” The news report drones on in the semi darkness.

There’s a figure seated at a small table in the dingy room , looking over phone records. He knows it’s a long shot , but he’s determined not to give up. He likes to win , and this was one battle he was going to win for sure. He was gonna find that no good husband of his and drag his ass back home where he belonged. In his bed , cleaning and cooking for him and dangling off his cock whenever he got the urge.

“I kinda just fell into it you know. “ Came the voice he last heard over the phone , the voice of his husband. Doug could only smile , now he knew where he just had to plan the how.

OMG THAT WAS HARD…COUPLE OF EPISODES HAD NO BUDDIE AND OTHERS SO LITTLE….KINDA WENT A LITTLE FURTHER OFF TRACK NOW….AND OUR BOYS HAVE A BIT OF ANGST…AND DOUG MAKES A REAPPEARANCE OH NO….AS ALWAYS FEEL FREE TO JOIN THE FACEBOOK GROUP AND HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER….


	5. Haunting

QUICK AUTHOR’S NOTE!!!! SORRY IT’S TAKEN SO LONG TO GET THIS OUT BUT BETWEEN 3 KIDS , A HOUSE , A HUSBAND AND PUBLISHING MY FIRST NOVEL ON AMAZON THINGS HAVE BEEN CRAZY…I DON’T WANT TO SHAMELESSLY PLUG MY OWN NOVEL BUT LOOK FOR FULL MOON PAINTED BLACK ON AMAZON BY R.J. KENYON...NOW ONTO WHAT YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR...BUDDIE!!!!!!!!

 

Buck still hadn’t had a chance to talk to Eddie about things. They’d been busy with post earthquake calls and he hadn’t tried hard to make the time. He wasn’t in a big hurry to tell the guy that he kissed , that he had feelings for , that he had slept with reporter lady to make sure she didn’t expose the video of the Captain high as hell. Or the part that he had come here running from his abusive husband that he was terrified he’d find him and kill him. Yeah he wasn’t in a hurry. 

“Hey , Buck you got a second?” Eddie asked as he walked into the rack room at the station. 

“Uh…” Buck started when the alarm went off. He sighed in relief.

They loaded up and was rolling up to a cemetery. Buck hated the place , he was always spooked when he went past one let alone into one after dark. They had gotten a call about someone trapped and his mind went straight to trapped in a coffin , buried alive.

“So what do we have?” Cap asked the people who called. 

“We were working on digging the plot for Mrs. Mandachek when the ground just shuddered all of a sudden and they were gone. Elisio and Stavros got sucked in.” 

“It was like quicksand , somehow I got a hand out and he pulled me out , but Stavros is still down there.” 

“It’s the earthquake , it created all these pockets underground. It’s like walking on air filled egg shells.” 

“How long ago did it collapse?” Cap asked as they looked at the area that had sunk. 

“About half an hour ago.” 

“What do you think?” he asked Chimney.

“He’s been breathing dirt for half an hour…” Buck stated skeptically. 

“Not necessarily. There are pockets of air so it’s possible he’s in one of those.” Chim offered. 

“Let’s get a look at what we’re dealing with.” Cap said as they grabbed the imaging equipment. 

They scanned back and forth over the collapsed area looking for body heat that indicated a living person. They strayed as close to the edge as they dared , walking around the whole thing looking at the cold skeletons. 

“Is that a...no way?!” Buck exclaimed as Stavros’ heat registered on the monitor. 

“Air pockets.” Cap smiled at him.

“But those are coffins!” Buck shivered. 

“Let’s get to digging in there before he runs out of what air there is in that coffin.” 

Buck shared a look with Eddie , he really hated cemeteries. They hopped in carefully over the place where Stavros had shown up , making sure that the ground wasn’t about to suck them in too. Eddie merely gave him a devil may care smirk and started digging. They got maybe a dozen shovel fulls before the ground rumbled and started to give beneath them. 

“It’s going! Get out of there!” Cap shouted as they grabbed Buck and Eddie , pulling them to safety. 

“What about Stavros?!” the others who were standing , waiting yelled. 

“I got this!” Hen yelled and jumped on a backhoe. 

“The keys are in it!” Elisio yellled.

Hen started up the enormous machine as the others stared in awe. She maneuvered the scoop to start gouging out the earth covering the victim. After the third batch there was a hand and the others rushed to grab it while Hen backed off and shut it down. 

“That was some serious badass driving.” Buck said as they wheeled Stavros toward the ambo.

“Thanks.” 

“I really hope they forgive us.” Hen looked at him grimly.

“Who?” 

“The spirits we disturbed , I don’t need that bad juju following me home.” 

Hen turned and walked off , leaving Buck standing there alone looking confused. He had no idea if the spirit world was something he believed in or not. Growing up he and Maddie were carted off to church every Sunday and Wednesday. Though if he followed the church’s beliefs then he was going to hell for sure for loving a man so there was that. Suddenly the backhoe Hen had been using collapsed into the hole , the back end the only visible part and Buck felt a shiver. 

Maybe bad juju was a thing , I mean look at how his luck had gone with Doug.

EBBBEBEEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBEBBEBEBEBEBEB

The next day they were on shift , Buck did everything he could to avoid Eddie. He knew he was getting frustrated with him , but he wasn’t ready to face the rejection. He was hiding out in the bathroom , if he kept this up they were going to think he was doing something else. Suddenly the bell went off and he rushed to get to the truck. 

“You know I’m sure reporter lady will help with that Buck , you don’t need to spend all that time in the bathroom.” Chim teased as he hopped in the ambo with Hen. 

“Dammit.” Buck whispered to himself. 

“He’s got a point , not about the reporter , but the bathroom time. Do we need to have some kind of conversation?” Bobby asked as they headed out. 

“No , sir.” he avoided looking at Eddie. 

They rolled up on the scene , a hiker on one of the trails had fallen over a cliff and was only able to tell Maddie the general area before his shotty cell service cut him off. Buck grabbed repelling gear for going over the edge. They hiked up the few miles to the area the call came from.

“Park ranger said they closed the trail , but every once in awhile you get the occasional thrill seeker who ignores it.” Bobby shook his head. 

“They weren’t able to track the phone , get an exact location?” Eddie asked.

“No , there’s been no activity since the call dropped. I know it would make this a lot easier , but we work with what we have.” 

They walked through the mild heat , the trail filled with dirt paths and shrubs scattered around. There were rocks of all sizes surrounding the trail as it wound through the hills. They came upon a cliff along the trail , Eddie squinting and running ahead.

“Guess this is where he went over!” he yelled as he reached the edge , a selfie stick lying in the dirt. 

“Alright Hen , Chim help get the rigging set up. Prep a basket in case he’s incapacitated and I’ll radio in air support in case we need a lift.” Bobby nodded to them , grabbing his radio. 

“T-118 this is Captain Bobby Nash , requesting aerial recon to Abalone Cove in Palos Verdes.”

“Copy that T-118 “ dispatch responded.

Buck and Eddie strapped up in harnesses , each checking the other’s rigging. Buck blushed as Eddie slid his hands beneath the buckles at his waist , too close to the place he desperately wanted him to be touching in a different setting. Once they were cleared and hooked up they stepped over to the edge and Buck started down first , Eddie watching like a hawk before following. 

Buck reached the crevice and made an effort to make sure that he focused on what he needed to and not the glorious view of Eddie’s ass above him , accentuated by the rigging. He reached the landing and unhooked , helping Eddie as he reached the ground in front of him.

“Buck…” Eddie whispered as Buck unclipped the line from his waist. 

“After our shift , we can’t...we need to do the job first ok.” Buck answered , head ducking. 

“I’m holding you to that , no running off.”: Eddie said pecking him on the cheek real quick , retreating back like he was afraid he had fucked up again. 

"Hey , you guys see anything down there yet?” Bobby came over the radio breaking the moment. 

“No , just a million-dollar view.” Buck said looking at Eddie. 

“Whoa.” Eddie said as he looked at Buck and spotted something in the crevice behind him. 

“Cap we got something.” Eddie radioed in. 

“Is it our hiker?”

“It’s a hiker , but not the one we’re looking for. This is skeletal remains Cap. They’ve been here a long time. 

“Alright flag it , but don’t disturb it. We’ll call it in.”

“Unless….” Buck said as he spotted the cell phone , holding it up for Eddie to see. 

“What you think Casper called 911? Get real man.” Eddie shook his head at him. 

“Help…”a voice yelled from in the distance.

“So no ghost.” 

They stood and looked in the direction the voice had come from. Together they carefully made their way across the rocks toward the voice. Buck slipped on some loose rocks and Eddie grabbe him , pulling him to his body. Buck wrapped his arms around his waist and pressed his face in his chest , inhaling the scent of Eddie. 

“Careful.” Eddie whispered , his hand squeezing his arm. 

“Buck ,Eddie what’s going on down there?” Bobby asked.

“We thought we heard something , going to investigate.” Buck said as they continued over the rocks. 

“Ugh..” the voice came again closer , behind a stack of rocks. 

“Hey , we’re coming.” Eddie called out. 

“Cap , we got one. Looks like his leg is broken.” 

“What’s your name , man?”

“Ian , how did you guys find me?!” 

“Well , you weren’t on long enough for them to ping your phone.” Eddie said.

“We’re sending the basket down to you.” Cap radioed.

“Wait , on with who? What are you talking about?” Ian looked between them in confusion. 

“911 , they couldn’t hear you very well and it was going in and out before it dropped the call.” 

“I..I dropped my phone when I went over...I never made a call to 911.” 

Buck looked up at Eddie , there was no way they got a call from a ghost , was there? He smiled at Eddie’s look of total disbelief. The guy groaned between them and Buck jumped up to grab the basket that was descending , they’d figure the call out after they got the guy up and to the hospital. 

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“I’m telling you guy swears he never called 911.” Buck told them again. 

“Look , he probably thought he didn’t call , but he did. That was a hell of a fall , he could have forgotten.” Chim told him. 

“Eddie would believe me.” Buck pouted. 

“Well , he’s off getting Christopher into that great school right now so you’re on your own.” Hen laughed. 

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“So does he get in?” Eddie asked the woman who had been showing him around the school Carla had found for him. 

They stopped and watched Christopher playing with a few of the other students. He had met him and Carla here , taking a long break from his shift to do this interview. He was glad Carla had found this school , hell he was glad Buck had brought him Carla. Just one more thing to love about the man. 

“Well , there’s just one more thing , the family interview.” 

“The what?” Eddie was confused. 

“Christopher’s wonderful , we have all the paperwork. We just need to meet with Mrs. Diaz and we’ll be all set. That’s not going to be a problem is it?”

“Of course not , I’ll let you know when we can set it up.” Eddie told her with a tight smile. 

She agreed and walked them back to the lobby. Once there she left them , Christopher got to spend the whole day there making sure he was comfortable and Carla would pick him up later. Eddie kept a smile until she was gone up the steps and then he turned to Carla , letting it fall.

“That’s going to be a problem.” he told her. 

“I know she’s a touchy subject for you , but if you explain the situation to the principal we can get it worked out. You just need a copy of the custody agreement , you have one right? If not we can pick one up , easy.” 

“That’s the problem. There isn’t one , we’re still married. She just took off and I moved here for work.” 

“Eddie.” Carla sighed. 

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Eddie was back at the station , it was night fall and they were halfway through their shift. He was still freaking out about needing to contact his wife. She had said she couldn’t handle being a wife and a mother , especially to a special needs kid and was gone while he was overseas. 

He hated that she had left them , well mostly that she had left Christopher. It was hard following that , he had come back from tour and Christopher was scared for him to leave the room. It had taken months to get him ok with him going to work and back to sleeping in his bed. Now he had to talk to the woman who had caused that and bring her back into their lives. 

The bell went off , jogging him from his thoughts. This shift couldn’t end fast enough he thought as he closed the phone after sending a text explaining the school situation to her. He was ready to resolve that , maybe she would sign over custody and disappear again , and ready to talk with Buck about that kiss. 

“Tons of bats man , but most of the injuries came from people stampeding out the place.” the guy running the haunted house trail thing told them as they arrived. 

“Was anyone bit , possible rabies exposure? I can deal with that , but I need to know if they’re going to be foaming at the mouth.” Hen explained. 

“Buck , Eddie go around back and see about the power situation. We can’t treat what we can’t see.” 

“You got it Cap.” Buck said as he and Eddie made their way around back. 

“So don’t understand people and their attraction to things like this.” Buck told him as they looked for the fuse box.

“People like to be scared , gets them excited and makes them feel better or something. I figured you’d be into the whole Halloween scary thing.” Eddie looked at him.

“Some people have enough horror in their lives to not need anymore.” Buck whispered.

“Buck , are you..”

“Not yet , shift’s not over.” Buck gave him a sad smile. 

They found the fuse box and flipped it back on , a few stray bats taking flight at the sudden light. They made their way through the maze , helping anyone stuck in their place or injured along the way. The worst injury they found thankfully was a guy who had spooked during the bat invasion and ran face first into the wall.

After the call most of them were off shift , Eddie had to stay on a few extra hours in trade of his interview time. He was going to meet Buck at his apartment after he got off. When Buck got home he found Maddie with dinner already made. 

“We found the skeleton’s 911 call from six years ago , but it’s my call from today.” Maddie told him as she handed him his plate. 

“So it was a ghost who called.” Buck smiled at her. 

“Why are you whispering?” she poured them glasses of wine.

“It’s a call from a guy that’s been dead for six years , it’s a ghost call.” 

“I swear. Call it a ghost if it makes you feel better , I keep thinking about that wedding band.” 

“What about it?” Buck started eating , he made sure to save some for Eddie. 

“Think about the fact that he had someone waiting at home every night , hoping he would come home , never knowing why he wasn’t. How awful that must have been.”

“It takes seven years to be declared legally dead.” 

“How do you know that?” 

“I looked into things when Doug started hitting me ,wanted to know how long I had to be gone for it to become legal in case I went missing. He wasn’t going to tell you that I was gone.” Buck told her. 

“Buck….God I hate thinking that he could have killed you and we would never have known.”

“It’s ok , it’s all over now. I’m away from him and I’m never going back.” 

“Do you think it’s time to give Abby her place back , to stop using her to hide who you are?” Maddie asked suddenly.

“Maybe , Eddie is supposed to come over when he gets off to talk about what happened when we were drugged.” 

“Well , I’m beat I’m going to go to bed and put in ear plugs.” 

“Really?” 

Maddie washed her plate and glass and scurried off to bed. Buck couldn’t believe his sister , he wasn’t going to sleep with Eddie. Sure he wanted to , but he was pretty sure once he told him about his husband beating the shit out of him all the time that there would be no arousal. That was if he didn’t run once he learned how fucked up Buck was , how damaged he was. He finished eating , cleaned up leaving Eddie’s plate in the microwave and went to the couch to watch TV and wait. He didn’t remember falling asleep , but he did remember waking alone the next morning.

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Eddie ran by the house for just a moment , wanting to shower and change real quick. He had already talked to Carla , she was going to watch Christopher at her house , he loved it there. He would pick him up in the morning since he was off tomorrow and there was no school. He had just jumped out the shower when there was a knock on the door. 

“Who the hell?” Eddie wondered as he walked toward it , pulling his shirt on. He pulled the door open. 

“Hey , long time no see. Surprise.” there stood Shannon , his wife.

“How...what are you doing here?” 

“I got your message , wasn’t far from here. Figured if we were going to talk about this it needed to be face to face.” 

“Ok , but it’s late.” Eddie said.

“I know , but I came by earlier and no one was here so I figured you were working.”

“Couldn’t this wait till the morning , I’m off then.” 

“Well , where are you going now?” she asked. 

“None of your business , we’re not together anymore.” 

“True , but what about Christopher? You going to leave him here alone while you go find some woman?”

“He’s with the babysitter and I’m not going out to get laid. I’m checking on a work friend.” 

“Then you have time to talk to me , unless that’s more important than getting him into this school?” 

“No , it’s not.” Eddie growled , she always knew how to manipulate him , especially when she used Christopher. 

She pushed past him and came into the house , looking around. He hated that she was like this , hated that she was the reason he had Christopher at all. He’d give anything to be free of her and still have his son. 

“So I bet he was shocked , moving here. I know I was when you called and left that message. You moved so close to me.”

“It wasn’t on purpose , we didn’t even know where you were.” 

“Ouch. But I guess I deserve that. So you need me to play nice for him to get into this school cause they don’t know that we’re not together and you don’t have custody?”

“Yes , that’s all I need is this interview and you can go back to living your life.” 

“What if I don’t want to , what if I want to get to know my son?” she quirked an eyebrow at him.

“Why now , because we finally got things back to normal. He can finally let me leave the house , at first I couldn’t leave the room he was scared I was never coming back.” 

“You did leave for Afghanistan , don’t blame that all on me. You ran first , only difference is you came back.” she sneered at him. 

“So what now you want to be his mother?” Eddie grit his teeth at her. 

“Maybe I do , you going to forbid me?” she smirked , knowing she had him. 

“No , but you don’t get to see him till I’m sure he can deal with it and with you leaving again.” 

“Maybe I don’t want to leave again , maybe I want us to be a family again.” 

“No , that’s not happening.” 

“So you have someone else , is she pretty?” 

“No , I don’t , but if I did that’s within my rights.” 

“You think you have the upper hand here , you don’t. You want him to get into this school , I want my family back.” 

“What are you saying?” he asked.

“We play by your rules when it comes to me seeing Christopher , but when it comes to me doing this school thing , you play by mine. I want to date , see if we can be together the right way this time.” 

“And if I refuse?” he clenched his fists. 

“Then I tell them that we are split up , that you took our son and moved away. Then maybe I tell the judge that too , see what that does to any custody.”

“You are an evil bitch you know that.” 

“You said you didn’t have anyone , why are you so against this?”

“I don’t like being forced.” 

“So don’t go along with it and we’ll see how things go.” 

“Fuck you , I’m not risking you weasling your way into getting MY son.” 

“So it’s a deal then?” 

“Yeah , now get out.” 

She left easily enough. He never should have contacted her , he could have found another school. He clenched his fists again , it would do him no good if he broke his hand. He looked at the time , angry that she had wasted so much of it. Buck was probably asleep now , angry that he hadn’t shown up. He wasn’t in the right frame of mind to be around anyone at the moment. He grabbed the tequila that was hidden in the back of the cabinet and got as drunk as he dared. 

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The next morning Eddie was worried about everything. He hadn’t heard from Buck , he wished he had never heard from Shannon and Christopher was happy to be spending the day with him. Thinking about Buck made his heart hurt , he had to agree to date Shannon. Just when he had been so close to getting things right with Buck , this shit happens. 

Maybe he should just tell him about his manipulative , blackmailing wife. He thought about it long and hard , deciding that he needed someone else’s opinion. He needed someone to tell him that he should tell Buck about everything , that it was alright to be with him. He wanted someone who might just make him feel right about his preferences for once in his life without anything being expected of him. 

He wanted Buck , but this was about him so that was off the table. He decided to go to the next best person. 

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Carla had arrived at the house thirty minutes ago and was helping Christopher with his costume while Eddie waited. He had already put his on , he was going as his favorite Kurt Russel movie character. He paced as he waited for Carla to be done so he could talk to her. 

“He’s all set , he just wanted to get the hair just right then surprise you.” Carla said as she came out of the bedroom. 

“That’s good. Thanks for helping with him.” 

“I love that boy , it’s no trouble at all. Now what has you all tied up in knots?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“That’s a great costume , but it didn’t come with a smile. Now what’s up?”

“It’s Shannon , this whole thing is a disaster waiting to happen. She came over after I texted her about the school. Apparently she lives not to far away and she demanded that I date her , give us as a family another go.”

“And what if you don’t go along with her idea?” 

“Well , she threatened to tell the school and even a judge that I don’t have custody and that I left the state with him knowing that.” Eddie sighed. 

“But she ran away from you and him , she left the state and her son behind.” 

“I know that , but no matter what happens judges want to keep kids with their mothers more than fathers. I don’t want to risk losing him.” 

“Is that all that’s got you twisted , that you have to date her? Do you think that things will be rekindled?”

“That’s just it , I know they won’t. I don’t want to play her game , I know I’m not going to be with her like that.” 

“What makes you so sure sugar?”

“Carla , I’m gay. I’ve been gay my whole life. The only reason I was with Shannon is we got drunk at a party and had sex and she got pregnant. If it wasn’t for Christopher we never would have seen each other again.” 

“Oh sweetheart , you do know how to get into it don’t you.” 

“Yeah , but I have him so I wouldn’t trade it for anything.” 

“So is there any particular reason , other than it’s wrong she’s forcing you and you’re gay , that you don’t want to go through this charade?”

“Like what?” Eddie looked at her.

“Like is there someone you got your eye on?”

“Oh , well there’s...ummm..”

“Just spit it out dear.” 

“I might kinda have kissed...Buck.” 

“Oooh baby! So are you worried how dating your wife is going to affect your thing with him?”

“Well , for one , but there’s also the fact that he was avoiding me and had to tell me something , but Shannon showed up.” 

“Oh no , just tell him what happened , what is happening with her and he’ll understand.” 

“You don’t seem to be surprised that he kissed me back.” he eyed her warily.

“Well , we’ve had plenty of drunk conversations after Abby left town. He won’t turn you down because he’s not into guys that’s for sure so you can stop worrying about that.” 

“Thanks Carla.” Eddie got out before Christopher came roaring down the hallway dressed as Wolverine. He loved that kid so damn much.

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Eddie had the night off , taking Christopher trick or treating. Buck wished that he could go with him , he loved the little guy and was sure that he would have a blast watching him go around the neighborhood as Wolverine. He wouldn’t mind checking Eddie out either. 

They got a call about a police horse that got spooked , Buck loved horses. The cop was banged up a little , but he was focused all on the horse. Buck’s heart clenched at the sight. 

“Can we get animal services here?” he asked. 

“It would take at least two hours or more , that’s too long.” Cap told him.

“How much does he weigh?” Hen asks the cop.

“About a thousand pounds.” he whispers back at her , shushing the horse. 

“We don’t carry enough on the ambo for that.” 

“It’s ok , I know he’s not going to make it , I just don’t want him to be in pain.” 

“We have enough morphine to help him.” Hen said.

“Ok , that’s a good boy , shhh.” 

Buck watched as they prepped the syringes and the cop said goodbye to his partner. Buck felt his eyes well with tears , his heart clenching thinking about another time and another animal. He had gotten a puppy with Doug , a pit that was copper and white colored , bat like ears. He had named him Copper , after the disney movie Fox and the Hound. 

Doug had killed him , taking him off into the night and returning alone. He had cried for a month , Doug beating the shit out of him if he caught him at it. It wasn’t long after that that he decided to leave. 

“Goodbye boy , go to sleep and wake in a world of fields and no responsibilities. Where you can roam and roll and be a horse again. Thank you for being there for me boy , I’m right here for you.” 

He nodded at Hen , who was having trouble , Buck knew that she was dealing with her father reappearing in her life on life support no less. Everyone linked arms , protecting the officer in his moment of need. Buck let the tears fall , for the horse and Copper alike. He wished Eddie were here.

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Eddie watched the entrance to the school in the side view mirror , waiting for Shannon to appear. The school had called to let him know that she was there to do the interview. He hadn’t expected her to go in so fast , he thought she would make him take her for a date or something first. 

“Thank you Mrs. Diaz. Have a wonderful day.” the principal said as she walked Shannon out to the parking lot. 

“Hey , how did it go?” Eddie asked as he hopped out the truck and ran up to her. 

“I did just fine I think. I know this is important so I’m not going to mess it up for him.” she huffed exasperatedly at him. 

“I know that...I was just...with what you said the other night and all.” 

“I still want us to be a family again. I don’t know why you’re against it.” 

“Because Shannon , we weren’t good together at all. If it wasn’t for Christopher , things would have ended far sooner.” 

“You’re a real asshole you know that. I know that I never should have left , but things were so hard and you were gone. I spent every moment going over what I did to make him….and it was all too much.” 

“Shannon , no matter what happened with us you can’t blame yourself for what happened to Christopher.” 

“It was my job to bring him into this world safely. I failed at that and he had to pay the price for it , everyday he pays for it.” 

“Things happen sometime and nothing you could have done would change that.” 

Shannon looked at him , tears running down her face at his defence of her. He stared at her and thought how things had gone back then. If only he had been straight. Suddenly Shannon lurched forward and grabbed his face in her hands , pressing her lips to his. She moaned into his mouth , for a moment he kissed back , stuck in the memory of the past. 

“Shannon….” he pushed her back. 

“I don’t understand why you don’t love me.” 

“It’s...complicated. Just know that this isn’t happening.” 

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Buck opened the door when Carla knocked. He had come home after the horse call , not wanting to deal with everything he had called Carla. He needed advice before he talked to Eddie and besides Maddie who was working , Carla was the next best thing. 

“Hey honey , what’s got you all mixed up?” she said as she came in and took a seat. 

“I wanted some advice , the stuff I’ve been keeping to myself. You want a glass of wine?” he asked as they sat on the couch.

“Sure hun , you look like you need one.” 

He poured them both a glass of wine , taking a bottle from Abby’s collection. Not that she was going to be using them anytime soon. He figured he’d buy her some replacement wines when she came back. Well , if she came back.

“So is this about telling Eddie you like guys and you were married?” 

“Mostly , there is some stuff I didn’t tell you though about my past.” 

“Ok , well what has you worried about telling him?”

“Well , there’s the fact that I’ve kept being gay from everyone. I know I told you that I was married before I came here and that Abby was my beard after we met. But there’s something I didn’t tell you.” 

“He’ll understand the fact that you were afraid to tell them you were gay. I mean that’s why you didn’t tell them right?”

“Well , it was the fact that I kinda ran from my husband. I got here and I was afraid he’d find me and I hadn’t really had a chance to be myself for a long time. So when I got here I kind of went crazy trying to be different.” 

“Why were you running from your husband , hun?” 

“Well , he used to...used to beat me. I had enough and finally ran out. I just don’t think Eddie will take it ok. The guys at the station definitely won’t take it right when I tell them I’ve been lying.”

“Baby if he can’t deal with the fact that you were a victim of something you had no control over , then he’s not the man that deserves you. As for the others , telling them is your choice , but I think they will understand. If not they don’t deserve your friendship either.” 

“Thanks Carla.” Buck smiled a watery smile at her. 

“Now , what else you got going on in that head of yours?”

“If I don’t tell the guys at the station yet I still think it’s time I stop using Abby. It’s not like they actually think I’m dating her anymore. They all think I’m hanging on for her and she’s out there screwing everyone. I think it’s time to ‘break up’ and move out.” 

“I think that’s a fine idea. She wouldn’t want you to be here moping about out of some odd sense of obligation to her. She can take care of the apartment if she needs to.” 

“I think I will. Not sure where I’ll go , but I think it’s time to be on my own.” 

“Great sugar. Now let’s drink the rest of this wine and worry about some good romance movies for the rest of the night.” 

“It’s a deal.” 

Buck poured them more wine as Carla loaded up The Notebook. He loved that he had found a great friend in her. She was right too , Eddie didn’t deserve him if he couldn’t understand his past. The guys at the station either , he knew that he had made some mistakes , but he didn’t deserve to be defined by that. 

He decided that he would hold off on telling the station about his past. Eddie definitely had to know , if they were going to do anything he needed to know. As for the situation with Taylor , he was avoiding that like the plague. He couldn’t wait for time to talk to Eddie even if he was still a little nervous.

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“How many nights?” the clerk asked the dark haired man.

“How much for a month?” the man asked.

“$687. That’s the last day of November.” 

“I’ll see if I need longer after that.” 

“No problem , what brings you to L.A.?”

“I’m looking for someone.” 

“Well , I hope you find them.” the clerk handed him the room key with a smile. 

“Me too.” Doug said and walked out to his room.


	6. Love and Marriage

“Buck , you and Eddie go up there and get harnessed up in case she tries to go over.” Bobby said as they rolled up to the scene. 

There was a woman on the overpass , standing on the sign front with her own homemade one about a man named Norman. She was in a bathrobe , yelling about Norman. Buck wasn’t sure that he wanted to know what this man had done. 

“Got it Cap.” Eddie said as they hopped out and grabbed the gear. 

They made their way up to the overpass , traffic was stopped in both directions. Athena was down under the overpass trying to talk to the woman. She had gotten everyone’s attention once she had flipped open the bathrobe and flashed everyone her naked body. 

“You ok to do this?” Eddie asked as he checked the rigging on Buck. 

“Yeah , why wouldn’t I be?”

“I’m not sure. Maybe because of the rollercoaster incident. I don’t want you to have another one on your conscience.” 

“Thanks for your concern , but I got it. Help me over though?”

“Of course. Hey can we talk later , I know that we were supposed to do it already , but things came up. My wife came knocking at my door after I texted her about Christopher’s school thing.” 

“How did that go , you haven’t seen her since she left right?”

“No , I haven’t , but it didn’t go well. That’s part of what I want to talk about along with what you wanted to talk about with me.” 

“We can get together , but I might have to come to your house. I moved out of Abby’s place and am crashing with Chim at the moment.” 

“Ok , you’re all set. Be careful.” Eddie said finishing hooking him up and helping him over the edge. 

Buck made his way over the edge and onto the platform. The woman was focused on Bobby and Athena , talking to them about how her husband doesn’t notice her. As soon as Buck hit the platform Bobby nodded to the others that had been under the overpass inflating the bag to put under her in case she tries to jump. 

“NO!” she yelled as they pulled it out from under the bridge. 

“It’s just to make sure that you’re safe nothing more.” Athena said. 

“You’re not going to stop me from making Norman see me.” she pulled a gun out of her pocket and shot at the bag , it deflating with a hiss and then pointing the gun at Buck. 

“Whoa.” Buck said holding his hands up and freezing in place. 

“You don’t want to do that , you have every gun of the Los Angeles P.D. trained on you. If you don’t want them shooting you take that gun off that man right now.” Athena yelled at her. 

Eddie felt his heart skip a ton of beats , the sight of the gun pointing at Buck scared the shit out of him. He had to force himself to hold still and not jump over the rail and step in front of Buck. 

Buck had hardly been this scared before and that was saying something considering life with Doug. He hardly dared to move , waiting for Athena to talk the woman down. Slowly she seemed to be getting through to her. 

“I wasn’t going to shoot anyone , I just wanted to get his attention.” 

“You have the attention of the whole city at the moment. Why don’t you give him the gun?”

“Here you can have it. I’m so sorry.” she said turning toward Buck and handed him the gun. 

“It’s ok , I understand what it’s like.” 

“I’m sure you are invisible. Get real , no one could ignore you.” 

“I just broke up with my girlfriend , she has spent the last few months traveling around the world. I was living at her place and then one day I realized that I was just there to watch the house and collect the mail.” 

“You’re serious. Why did she leave?”

“Her mother died and she had spent so much time taking care of her that I understood she needed time to be herself. But that was months ago and now I realize that I need to be me , that I can’t do that if I’m living there collecting the mail.” 

“Hey , Norman is here , he’s here for you.” Athena said. 

“What is going on honey?” 

“You don’t see me Norman , I’m invisible to you. Just there to collect the mail.”

Buck watched as they worked things out. Norman proving that he did still know who his wife was. The song wasn’t Buck’s cup of tea , but whatever floats their boats. Finally he could help her over the rail and back onto the overpass. Athena arrested her of course , but they were rekindling their marriage. 

“What the hell was that?!” Eddie yelled as he grabbed Buck once they were over and away from the others. 

“What do you mean?” Buck asked , flinching at the anger in his voice. 

“You just stood there while she pointed that gun at you like an idiot waiting to get shot.” 

“What was I supposed to do?” Buck asked , feeling better now that Eddie wasn’t yelling at him. 

“I don’t know. I just know that I couldn’t handle seeing her pointing that gun at you. I almost jumped down there and pushed her away from you.” 

“I’m alright. I’ll try not to have anymore guns pointed at me.” 

“Make sure you don’t.” Eddie said as he pulled Buck in for a hug. His adrenaline wearing off now that Buck was safe. 

“Can we talk after shift?” Buck asked.

“I have to be with Christopher , Carla can’t watch him tonight and I don’t want this to be something he could overhear.” 

“Let me know when you can. There has to be sometime we can talk.” 

“I will.” 

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Buck went out to the bar with Chim , he didn’t really want to. He was sure that he was trying to set him up to find a girl since he had explained that he was ‘moving on’ from Abby. He looked around as they sat at a table , there were a lot of women here and he really wanted Eddie here instead.

“Who’s the wine for?” Buck asked after Chim ordered drinks. 

“Maddie , she’s parking her car.” he said as he waved to her coming in. 

“My sister , why is she here?” Buck asked. 

“Hey , guys. Man I should never get on the freeway.” she threw her purse at the empty seat next to Buck. 

The night went wonky after that. He had to sit there and watch the flirting between Chim and his sister , which was not what he had wanted to see. Ever. They got up and sang karaoke. He had to admit they were pretty good , but again there was the fact that it was his sister and flirting was involved. He was delivered a drink , confused he asked where it came from. 

“The lady over there.” the bartender pointed out Taylor Kelly. Buck felt the bile rise in his throat as she smiled at him. 

She makes her way over to him , smirk in place the whole time. Buck looked around , but there was no help. Maddie was still up on stage singing with Chim. She slid into the seat next to him , her hand landing on his thigh. 

“What do you want?” he asked.

“I want the same thing as before.”

“Why would I agree to that?” Buck sneered at her , removing her hand. 

“Same reason as last time , you don’t want Captain Nash to be seen as high as a kite talking to his dead daughter on a roof do you?” 

“What the hell do you want to sleep with me for?” 

“I don’t have any other options at the moment and you’re easy.”

“Fine , when?”

“Now , meet me in the bathroom.” she said as she got up and walked toward the men’s room.

Buck felt the bile threatening to come up. He swallowed it down , wishing that he could tell her to fuck off , but he couldn’t let her do that to Bobby. Not after everything that man had done for him. He managed to calm his stomach and make his way to the bathroom , praying it was quick.

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Forty minutes later he waited for her to leave and then once he was done throwing up he left the bathroom too. He hoped that his sister and Chim had thought he left and were gone themselves. He really didn’t want to face them. 

“Wow , was that Taylor Kelly I saw leaving?” Chim asked coming toward the bathroom. 

“Yeah.” Buck felt his heart sink , now there was no hiding what happened.

“Look at you , single and already mingling.” Chim laughed and smacked him on the back. 

“I’m going to head out.” Buck said , the feeling of her hands on him turning his stomach. 

He told Maddie by and was gone before either of them said much more. He made it back to Chim’s apartment and scrubbed himself clean as he could in the shower and brushed his teeth before crashing on the couch. He managed to cry himself to sleep silently.

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The next morning Chim had left before Buck and was already at the station when he got there. He had stopped to get some ginger ale to ease his stomach. He was still sick to his stomach from last night. He made his way up on the balcony and joined everyone else that was already sitting at the table. 

“There he is.” Chim said as he joined them. 

“I stopped to get a drink.” Buck said as he sat across from Eddie. 

“You did have a big night last night.” Chim said. 

“What did he do?” Hen asked. 

“He had a bathroom romp with Taylor Kelly at the bar last night.” Chim laughed and Buck felt the color drain from his face. 

He looked up to see Eddie’s reaction. He was sitting there with a look of disbelief on his face. He couldn’t believe that Chim would just blurt that out , like he wanted everyone to know. Of course , he hadn’t talked to him last night about what had happened other than the moment as he left. 

“Well , I have to go do...something that’s not here.” Eddie said , getting up and leaving before he was done eating. 

“I’ll be back.” Buck hurried after Eddie. 

He found him in the workout room , already punching the hell out of the bag. Buck hesitated , hating that he was still unsure when it came to Eddie and anger. He walked slowly toward him , ready to retreat at any moment as he kept his eyes on Eddie’s hands. 

“Hey can we talk for a minute?” Buck whispered as he came into Eddie’s line of sight. 

“I think you said everything last night with Taylor Kelly don’t you?” Eddie snapped out.

“It’s not what you think. Please can we just talk?” Buck pleaded. 

“I don’t think so.” Eddie delivered a hard punch to the bag and Buck flinched back instinctively. Eddie turned and left him standing there. 

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The rest of the shift Buck avoided Eddie , he was still afraid after the way he had blown up at him. Rationally he knew that he wouldn’t hit him , but the fear and caution was so ingrained in him at this point. 

He was quiet as he went about his day , talking only if it was required. He didn’t want to get in more trouble by pissing Bobby off too. He thought the whole time about what he was going to do. He was done being jerked around by Taylor. 

He was afraid that if he didn’t cut things off the right way he was going to ruin things for Bobby. After he had told him he took care of it, he was sure that Bobby would blame him if the tape got out. 

He needed to get something on her , make sure that he could hold it over her head so she couldn’t keep holding the tape over his. He had a friend that he had made from one of his early calls that specializes in spy tech type cameras and video equipment. 

If he could take a video of her threatening him he might be able to end this once and for all without hurting Bobby. Decision made he sent him a text explaining what he needed and that he’d be by after shift. 

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“So what kind of stuff you need this for , nothing illegal right?” Paul asked as he handed over the equipment. 

“No , I got someone blackmailing me and this is going to get that on record so I can make sure she stops.” Buck told him , handing over $200.

“Really? No , keep the money. You get this for free to nail that bitch.” 

“Thanks , but I can afford it. Besides I owe you after that thing at the club that one time.” 

“I’m available to save your ass from a bear wanting to tap it anytime boo.” 

Buck smiled and headed out. He had to get home and rig the camera up to his jacket. Then he was going to find her evil bitch ass and nail it to the wall. He would make sure to make a copy so he had security. He wouldn’t put it past her to find a way to get the tape. 

He got dressed , the camera hidden in a missing button on his jacket. He made his way to the station , sure that she was there. She was ruthless and would be trying to climb even higher on the ladder by doing whatever she had to. 

“Buck ,  what can I do for you?”

“I wanted to talk about this little arrangement we have going.” 

“What about it , I’m kind of busy.” 

“I’m done with it. It’s over.”

“Oh it is , is it?” she sneered at him. 

“Yeah , it is.” Buck tried to keep the ‘don’t give a shit’ attitude , even though he was trembling inside. 

“Well , then you better prepare that Captain of yours for humiliation. I’ll release the tape for everyone to see. Then they’ll be looking into his past , any drug use , how his kid died , all of it.” 

“They won’t care , he’s the Captain of your precious fluff piece you did. Why would they care that we were drugged , cause I will tell them?”

“So you think it won’t matter? Well what if I had something else on someone else?” she asked.

“Like who?” 

“How about you? Maybe I let slip some shit about you.”

“What could you ever have on me?” Buck let out a nervous laugh.

“Does Doug Kendall tell you enough?” 

Buck felt his heart race. There was no way she could have found out about Doug. Then again how else would she know to use that name. If she knew about him and let that secret out not only would everyone at the station know , but she could lead Doug right to him. 

“So I think it’s not over is it? I think we’re going to keep having sex whenever I want and if you don’t then the whole world is going to find out that straight little Bucky is gay and was married. What happened to that anyway , why are you here and he’s not?” 

“None of your fucking business.” Buck snapped out and turned to leave. 

“Remember that I can release the info anytime I want!” she yelled after him. 

Buck made it to the car and away from her. He was driving without knowing where he was going or how he was driving to begin with. His heart was in his throat , his body shaking. He might even be in shock a bit. He felt his world threatening to collapse completely. 

He pulled over in a parking lot , where he had no idea. He sat there with the truck turned off and thought about it all. He couldn’t let her keep using him like this , but he didn’t want to have his past let out to everyone. God what was he going to do?!

He needed help and there was only one person he thought could help him now. He started the truck and headed downtown. 

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“Hey , Buck what are you doing here and so late?” Athena asked. 

“I need your help with something and I need it to stay between us as much as possible. I plan to tell the guys , just not right now.” 

“Well , this has my interest. Are you ok , not in any trouble are you? I don’t want to arrest you.”: 

“Can we go somewhere with a computer or something , this involves video?” 

“This way.” she said as she took the camera from him. 

They made there way to an office that wasn’t occupied. She motioned for him to sit in the chair while she started up the computer and hooked everything up so they could view the footage. Buck felt his palms start to sweat and his body heating at the thought of what he was about to share with Athena. 

“Are you ok? Buck honey you look like you’re about to puke.” 

“Yeah , I just haven’t been ready to tell anyone these things and now I’m kind of forced to.” 

“Ok , start at the beginning.” 

“I was...married before I came here. Things didn’t work out and I ran. That’s the first thing you need to know. When we were drugged I knew that I couldn’t let her air the stuff with Bobby.” 

“Do you want to tell me why you left your wife?” 

“That’s just it. I wasn’t married to...a woman. I was married to a guy named Doug. We got married after high school and things were alright for a little while. Then he started to hit me.” 

“Buck , honey do you need a moment?” 

“No. Anyway after the drugs wore off I went to talk to Taylor Kelly about the footage of Bobby. She agreed to let it disappear if I...slept with her.” 

“What the hell?”

“I know , I know , but I had to make sure she didn’t use that footage. I thought that was the end of it. Until the other night when she cornered me at the bar. I tried to end things tonight , I made sure that I video taped it all so I could get her blackmailing me. Only thing is this time she threatened to use my husband.” 

“That is illegal and we will knock her off her little pedestal. We can keep the info she had quiet.” 

“Thanks Athena. I couldn’t handle it if she let all that out and Doug found me.” 

“I’ll take care of it all. Can you make it home alright?”

“Yeah , do you need me to stay while you watch the video?” he asked , his gut churning at the thought of watching it and reliving it all again. 

“No , you just make it home safe and I’ll let you know when we arrest her ass.” 

“Ok , thank you so much.” 

“You grew on me boo , you don’t deserve any of this.” 

Buck smiled at her and she walked him out of the station. He started home , but he knew that he should stop one place before he did. He had to talk to Eddie before things got any worse. He pulled up to Eddie’s house and was glad to find out that he was home. He felt sick again , but he was determined to do this. 

He walked up and knocked on the door hoping he wasn’t disturbing Christopher. He heard footsteps coming toward the door. He tried to take a calming breath. Eddie pulled the door open and stared at Buck. 

“What are you doing here?” Eddie asked. 

“I needed to talk to you. Just hear me out before you slam the door in my face.”

“Ok , I’m listening.” Eddie said crossing his arms. 

“I didn’t want to sleep with her. She made me. When I told Bobby I made sure that she wouldn’t show the footage of him drugged it was because she agreed if I slept with her. The other night she threatened to release the footage if I didn’t keep sleeping with her.” 

“Buck…” 

“No there’s more. I need to get through it all. When you were so angry with me I knew I had to make her leave me alone , but I didn’t want to risk Bobby. So I taped the conversation with her , I told her that it wasn’t working and she threatened me again. This time she used my past.” 

He paused and had to wring his hands together , his palms sweaty. He took a few deep breaths and Eddie uncrossed his arms looking at him in concern. Buck felt the tears burning his eyes , but he wanted to get through this. 

“I was married before I came here. To a man...named Doug. We married after high school and things were ok until he started to hit me.” his voice broke. 

“Come sit down.” Eddie ushered him toward the seats on the porch. 

“I’m sorry it’s been a hard week.”

“It’s ok , take your time.” 

“I can do it. I ran away from him and came here. I spent five years living under his reign of terror so when I got here I kind of went crazy. They thought I was straight and a playboy so I played to that. Even tried to sleep with a few women , but that didn’t make me happy. Now they think I’m this idiot player , but I’m gay. I just don’t want him to find me. Abby helped so I didn’t have to deal with them ragging on me or pretend to date women.” 

“Buck , I’m so damn sorry that I got angry with you. I should have let you talk to me. I’m really sorry that I scared you. I never want you to be afraid of me.” 

“I know that you wouldn’t do what he did , it’s just that five years of being hit engrains the reflexes to duck and flinch away. I’m still working on controlling it.” 

“Don’t worry about it. I should probably tell you my own problem that popped up. My wife showed up , came to help me get Christopher in that school since I don’t have custody. Only she wants me back , wants to date or she threatened to tell them and a judge that I took him without custody to another state.” 

“Why are all these women the same , blackmailing for sex or whatever?” Buck sneered.

“I don’t know. I just know that I have to play her game to make sure she doesn’t do anything to take Christopher away.” 

“Go to the cops.”

“She might get him if I do that. I get to keep her from him until I decide she can see him. Carla is going to help me file for custody so it won’t be forever.” 

“Well , that’s a plus.”

“About that kiss…”

“If you want to forget about that , it’s done.” 

“I want to do it again. I’ve known my whole life that I like both men and women. Mostly I like men more. That’s how I ended up with Christopher , we got drunk and had sex. But I want to see where things go with you if you want that too.” 

“I think that would be good. Just maybe take it slow.” 

“I couldn’t agree more.”

“I should get home. It’s been a long tiring day and we have a shift tomorrow.” Buck said and stood. 

“Let me know you make it home safe ok.” Eddie told him , pecking him on the cheek. 

“I will.” Buck blushed and headed to his truck. 

He made it home and texted Eddie to let him know. Chim was out so he took a shower and passed out on the couch. 

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The next day was slow , Eddie kept him occupied doing regular stuff like playing the pinball machine or working out with him. He couldn’t contain his smile every time he looked at him and thought about last night. Late in the afternoon they got a call. 

“Married couple on their way home was run off the road by a drunk driver. The car went through the guardrail and down there.” Athena pointed out as they arrived on scene. 

“We got to get to work , this is going to take a while and we’re losing the light.” Buck said as he nodded to Athena. 

They made their way down to the wreckage , the car had come to rest against a tree. It was bowed around it and there were limbs inside the car. The groom was driving and the bride in the passenger’s seat. She was out cold , but he was moaning lightly. 

“She’s in bad shape Cap.” Hen said. 

They worked to pull her out , Buck trying to ignore the memories of his own wedding. He was in a blue tux , Doug in black. They had been married at a small wooded clearing at a local gardens. It was Maddie on Buck’s side. Doug had a few friends , but mainly it was just them. 

The honeymoon was a trip a few towns over for the weekend. Three days later Doug was smacking the shit out of him because he knocked a glass of tea over and it landed on his lap at dinner. His wedding was nice , but the beatings that followed it made it one of the worst memories. 

“We need to get him out , he’s getting worse. The car is so warped on his side it’ll take too long to get him out.” 

“What if we don’t take him out of the car , but take the car away from him?” Bobby said as they looked at the car. 

They hooked one end of the car up to the tow truck and the other to the firetruck. Each pulled the car in opposite directions until it separated enough to get the groom out. They got him out and up the hill to the waiting ambulance. 

“Where’s my wife?” he asked before they loaded him. 

“She’s already at the hospital , they’re taking real good care of her.” 

“I’m glad we got them out. I just hope their marriage goes better than their wedding day.” Buck said. 

“I’m sure it will.” Eddie said with a knowing look. 

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Buck was pulling food out of the bags that Chim had insisted they pick up on the way home. He had gotten chinese and fried chicken while Buck had picked up some Thai and indian. He wasn’t sure why there was so much food and from so many places. 

“Why do we have all this food?” Buck asked. 

“Well , every Friday your sister comes over for dinner and can’t decide what to have so we do buffet Friday.”

“He couldn’t ever decide either so don’t think this is all me.” Maddie said. 

“You guys have dinner every Friday?” Buck looked between them as they made their plates. 

“Yeah , she didn’t know anyone so I figured we could hang out.”

“Not like I was going to spend everyday with just you Bucky. Dammit they forgot the sauce again!” Maddie huffed. 

“Right here.” Chim said producing a bag filled with duck sauce for her. 

“Aww , that is so sweet.” 

“I know how much you love it and they do forget it all the time.” Chim blushed at her. 

Buck looked between the two of them. He was starting to think they were dating. He was sure that Maddie would have told him , but then again he hadn’t known her for the past six years so he couldn’t really say for sure. 

“Are you two dating?” he asked as they all say in the living room.

“What?!” Maddie screeched. 

“No...I...we’re just friends.” Chim laughed embarrassed. 

“I think you are. Dinner every Friday , you remember her sauce. That’s dating.” 

“So what about you and Taylor Kelly?” Chim shot out. 

“No that’s nothing.” 

“What about Taylor Kelly now?” Maddie asked confused. 

“The other night at the bar they came out of the bathroom together. Little bro here was hitting that. Though it’s an upgrade from stealing the firetruck to have sex.”

“Oh.” Maddie said looking at Buck. 

“Later.” he mouthed as Chim was looking at his food. 

Maddie nodded at him in understanding. Suddenly Buck’s phone rang. He looked down to see who it was , but it only said unavailable. Maybe this was Abby , she hadn’t called in a while. He had left her a voicemail telling her that he was ‘breaking up.’ 

“Hello?” he answered the phone. 

“Hey , I hope this isn’t creepy , but I wanted to call and see if you would like to get together one day and talk.” a female voice answered. 

“Uh...I’m not sure…” 

“Oh , sorry I wasn’t thinking. This is Ali from the earthquake. You and your partner saved me from the building with my boss who was inappropriate.” 

“Oh , yeah. I think we can day after tomorrow.” 

“That sounds great. I can’t wait to catch up with you. Oh and don’t worry, I know it’s not like a date.” she laughed and hung up. 

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“I don’t know what happened. I went back in the house to get the helmets and I came out to find him...like this.” the man told Buck as he sat on the back of the ambulance as the others carefully laid the body on the driveway. 

“I’m so sorry sir , I can’t imagine finding someone I love like that.” Buck told him. 

“We had a crazy go at it. When we first met it was so taboo. Gays were in a lot more danger in those days. They used to kill us , beat us to death or rape us. But we took care of each other in the community. When I saw him across the dance floor I just knew.” 

Buck looked over at Eddie standing there , he was placing a sheet over the man’s husband. Buck was sure that Doug would never talk about him like this. He could relate to their story though , he just knew about Eddie. 

“We knew that everyday was possible our last , so we lived it like it was. We had so many adventures and loved so deeply so if it happened we would know we had made the most of our time.” he said as he wept silently. 

“I hope I can find a love like that one day.” Buck told him as he looked at Eddie. 

“You don’t find it son , you make it. Don’t wait for it to come to you , you have to go after it.” he nodded toward Eddie. 

“How…” 

“When you get to be as old as I am , you can tell son. A dog knows the difference between other dogs and cats.”

“If you’d like a moment to say goodbye sir.” Eddie said as he walked up. 

Buck smiled sadly at the man as he slowly stood , the blanket draped over his shoulders brushing the ground as he knelt and pulled the sheet back. Buck walked over to the car to pick up the fallen photo album for him. After losing his husband the pictures and memories were going to be more precious to him. 

“Buck can you help him up so we can take the body away.” Bobby asked. 

“Hey , I’m sorry to cut things short , but they’re ready to take him away now.” he touched his shoulder to get his attention. He had laid over on his still chest , probably crying. 

Buck shook his shoulder gently when there was no response. Suddenly afraid he pulled him back and he fell limply over. Buck dropped to his knees and started CPR. He couldn’t believe this was happening. 

“Guys he’s not breathing!”

“Buck what happened?” Bobby asked as he , Eddie and Chim rushed over. 

 “He was saying goodbye. I don’t know what happened , he was just talking to me.” Buck frantically did CPR. 

Chim checked for a pulse and looked at Bobby , shaking his head no. It was no use , the man was gone too. Bobby sighed and nodded to Eddie. Eddie hated that he had to stop Buck , he was obviously connected to this victim in the short time they had talked. 

“Buck , he’s gone you can stop now.” Eddie carefully held his hands still. 

“They really loved each other , couldn’t even live one day without him.” Buck said , tears pooling in his eyes. 

“Yeah they did.” Eddie whispered. 

The others loaded the two bodies up as Buck stood off by the car holding the album of their life and love. He was trying not to cry , he had dreamed of a love like that all his life and he hadn’t gotten it. But these two had found each other , in a time when it was dangerous to do so for them and had a life full of love. He slipped a picture of the two of them laughing with their heads together , the love for each other evident into his pocket. 

He would never forget them. He just hoped that one day he had someone who loved him like that. That wouldn’t be able to live if he was gone. He looked at Eddie and wished for a love like that. 

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Buck was on his way to a cafe to meet Ali , the earthquake girl he and Eddie had saved. He was curious what she wanted to talk about. He knew that she had sensed things between him and Eddie were more than friends , so he was sure she wasn’t looking to date or hook up. 

He had told Maddie all about the Taylor Kelly thing. She had been furious that she had blackmailed him and basically raped him , but had calmed a little once he told her he had taped her threatening him and taken it to Athena. Speaking of , he thought as his phone rang and her name popped up.

“Athena , what’s up?”

“Hey , Buck. I was calling to let you know we just arrested Taylor Kelly. She was in the middle of doing a live news story when we did it so I’m sure if you look you can find it. She’s being charged with blackmail , threatening a city employee , assault on a city employee and rape. She’s not going to be reporting anything but the state of jail house accommodations for a while.”

“I don’t know what to say. How can I ever thank you?”

“None of that now. No one threatens my family and gets away with it.” 

“You mean I’m family? I thought you couldn’t stand me after the baby in the pipe thing.”

“Buck , you have grown since then. You are one hell of a firefighter and a good man. You let that woman rape you just so Bobby would be safe. That makes you worthy to be my family. We should all be better people like you.” 

“Thanks Athena. I kind of needed that this week.” 

“Be safe boo.” she hung up and Buck had to wipe the tears from his eyes before he walked in to meet Ali. 

Finally dry eyed he walked in the crowded cafe and looked around for her. A dark haired woman came walking up to him and it took him a second to realize that was her. He smiled at her as she came up and hugged him. 

“I didn’t recognize you with the hair.” 

“Yeah , I figured it was time to go back to my roots.” she led him to a table near the wall. 

“So how have you been?” he asked as they say. 

“Good , I got promoted. I just wanted to thank you for being there that day and saving me.” 

“Well , it’s kind of my job.” Buck joked. 

“I know but still. I was hoping we could keep in touch , be friends. How are things with tall , dark and handsome going?” 

“We...are still figuring things out. It’s still complicated. No one knows I’m gay.”

“That must be awful. Why don’t they know?” 

“I kind of tried to act straight when I came here , they assumed and I was trying to fit in so I went with it. Abby was my friend and my beard.” 

“So what about now , are you going to tell them the truth if you and Eddie work it out?”

“I’m not sure. We haven’t talked about the future yet. We went over our pasts and we both were dealing with situations.” 

“We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you this breaking news story. Our very own Taylor Kelly was arrested just hours ago on charges of blackmail , assault and even rape. Here’s the shocking video of her arrest. Stay tuned for more information as we get it.” the tv across from them blared out. Buck watched with a smile. 

“Oh my god , that’s awful she would do that to someone. I hope that person sees this and knows that she’s getting what she deserves.” Ali said in disgust. 

“I know. My friend arrested her.” 

“Wait , you mean…”

“Yeah , it was me.” 

“That bitch. So , let’s focus on something else. If you want to keep things a secret still with Eddie , I would be glad to take Abby’s place.” 

“You would pretend to be dating me while I date Eddie?”

“Yeah , I kind of just moved here so I need some friends and friends do that kind of thing for each other.” 

“I would be delighted to be your friend. I’ll see what happens with Eddie about the other part.” 

“So tell me what kind of calls you’ve had since mine.” 

They talked for a while , well into the evening. He was glad to have another person he could be him with. She was a cool girl , if he had been straight she might have been his type. He was happy in this moment. He had a new friend , things were back on track with Eddie and Taylor Kelly was out of his life. Life was good. 

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Doug paced the motel room. Things were not going as easy as he thought. The reporter who had done the story was in jail , he could no longer ask her where Buck was. He didn’t want to do this at the fire station. He might end up in jail , who knew how that little fuck would react to him showing up. He would have to comb the streets , hoping to come across him. 

If that didn’t work , the firehouse would be the next step. He just hoped that it didn’t come to that. He punched the wall in frustration. He was ready to have his good for nothing ass back where he belonged. California wasn’t for him. 


	7. Buck Begins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god the completely off script how Buck left Doug and became a firefighter story. Up next Eddie Begins and then Christmas people!! Ahhhhhhh!

“Hey , are you going to grab a box or are you too busy looking at the house?” Doug teased as he came up the walk with a box in his arms and pecked Buck on the cheek. 

“I just can’t believe we bought a house.” Buck said with a smile.

“Well , believe it husband. Now grab a box so we’re not sleeping on the floor and naked without food. We got three days to get things settled before I start that job on Tuesday.”

Buck turned back to the u-haul and grabbed a box. They had closed on the house yesterday afternoon , the final step in the surprise Doug had had as a wedding gift. He had started buying the house in the months before the wedding. A week ago he had let Buck in on the secret , once he knew that it was going to happen. 

It had been a shock when they had driven down this street and stopped in front of this house. A two story light blue with columns framing the front door , which was red. Buck had been confused at first , they didn’t know anyone who lived in this neighborhood. 

“What do you think about that house?” Doug had asked.

“It’s cute , do we know someone here?”

“Yeah , we know the people who live here.” Doug smiled and got out of the car. 

He walked around to the other side and waited for Buck to climb out. They walked up the walk , the whole time Buck trying to figure out who they knew that could live here. All his family was out , his parents weren’t moving and his sister was off at college. Doug’s family was out , he really didn’t have much to speak of and he never spoke of them anyway. All their friends were either off at college or living elsewhere. They stopped on the brick stoop and Doug turned to him. 

“Have you figured it out yet?”

“No , I have no idea who we could know that lives here.” 

“Silly , we do.” Doug pulled a set of keys out of his pocket. 

“Wha...no way! You bought a house?” 

“We bought a house , I used the money that we had saved and we close next week.” 

“The money we had put up for me to go to college so I could become a teacher?” Buck whispered. 

“Well , I figured this was better. We can look into adopting now that we have a house instead of that tiny apartment.”

“You really want to adopt?!” Buck smiled at him. 

“Yes , we need some little feet filling up this big house.” 

Buck kissed him , there on the front step of their new house. Never once did he think about how Doug had taken college away from him and placated him with talk of kids. They had gone home after Doug had given him the tour of the four bedroom three bath house with a spacious backyard and started to pack. 

“I think that’s the last box.” Doug said as he placed the box on the kitchen counter. 

“We really didn’t have that much stuff. We’ll have to do some shopping to fill all this room.” 

“Well , I start this job on Tuesday and after a little while you can quit the restaurant job and start working on filling the house to your desire.” 

“You want me to quit? Wouldn’t it be better if we were both working , make more money that way.” Buck said as he went to put the plate he was holding in the cabinet. It was one of Doug’s heirlooms , given to him by his grandmother. She had passed away three years ago and he had been holding on to it since.

“Are you saying that I can’t make enough to support us , like I’m some dead beat?” Doug asked in a dead serious tone of voice. It sent a chill up Buck’s spine.

"No , I didn't mean it like that."

"Good." Doug said and continued unloading all the box in front of him. 

They got most of the stuff put up after a dinner of pizza and some beer. After a shower to wash the grime away they crawled in bed. Buck was worn out , but excited that this was all theirs. 

Doug snuggled up behind him and snuffled at the skin behind his ear. He laughed and rolled over to face him. 

"That tickles."

"I know , but it got you where I want you." He said as he started kissing him deeply and moved on top of him.

"Mmm...baby I'm so tired. Can't we wait till the morning?" Buck said as he managed to pull away. 

"I want you now though. I'll do all the work , you just lay there." He said as he reached for his sleep pants.

"Really I'm sore and it's killing the mood."

"It'll be fine just let me get you going." Doug reached in his pants and grasped his cock , starting to slide his hand up and down.

"No babe. Tomorrow I promise." Buck pushed at his chest forcing him to set up and his hand to come out his pants. 

Suddenly Buck's cheek was stinging and Doug had a look of horror on his face. He had hit him. 

"Oh my God I'm so sorry! I don't know…what happened. Are you ok?"

"I ...uh... I think so." Buck whispered. 

Doug crawled off him to sit beside him. He stared at his hands like they belonged to someone else. Buck watched him , worried about what might happen next.

"I can sleep on the sofa." Doug whispered.

"No , it's ok. Let's just cuddle ok." Buck laid back and waited for Doug to lay down , putting his head on his shoulder. 

They lay there in silence. Before Buck knew it Doug was asleep. He could only lay there and think about what had happened. Doug had never hit him. Then again this was the first time he had told him no. 

No that was no excuse. Maybe it was the stress of moving and starting that construction job. No , nothing really excused that. 

Buck. Lay there most of the night , part confused and fearful. He fell asleep before he could figure anything out , what to do about it or if this was going to get worse. 

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They had moved into the house four months after the wedding. Things had been a little tense after that first night when Doug had slapped him. Since then he had been sweet and caring. He had gotten the job and three weeks ago Buck had quit his job , Doug had convinced him that no adoption agency would approve them if they had a half filled house and babysitters or daycares to take care of the kids. 

“How was your day baby?” he asked as he and Doug sat down to dinner.

“It was a tough one , this new client wants all these outrageous modifications to the floor plan. He has no idea how to design a functional house he just wants a Jacuzzi instead of a tub on the second floor." 

"Is this guy married , cause I'm sure the wife would love that idea?"

"Nope , a bachelor at the moment. Think he just divorced wife number three. But he's rich so now I got to figure out how to do what he wants or close to it and follow building codes or Rob will have my ass fired. We need the money."

“I’m sorry love , we’ll get there. Gives us more time to prepare for a child anyway.” 

"Sure it will." Doug nodded and they finished dinner.

They were in the kitchen washing the dishes and talking. It had been a routine they established , especially after the slap.

"Don't you think it would be easier if I got another job ,just until we get ahead?" Buck asked aa they were drying and putting them away. 

"You think I can't support us?"

“NO , I swear I didn’t mean it like that. I just thought…” Buck stuttered out before he felt the plate slip from his hands. 

The sound of the plate shattering sounded louder than it should. There was silence in the kitchen as they both stared at the pieces lying on the floor. Doug snapped his hand out so fast that Buck almost didn’t see it. He hit him so hard his face turned to the right from the force of it. Buck stood there , afraid to turn his head back toward Doug who was panting a little. 

“I...that was...it was my grandmothers...I just.” Doug said. 

“I know , I’m sorry it was an accident it slipped.” 

“At least it’s only one plate.” Doug said and walked away. 

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Since the plate incident Buck had gotten a lot of anxiety about any dish. He held them in death grips when he had to move one and made sure that they never sat too close to the edge of the table or the counter. Doug had promised he would never do it again and things had been nice since then.

Still Buck worried. 

That was the second time that he had hit him , there was no excuse for it. Yet when Buck laid there in bed at night thinking about it and what he should do , he knew that realistically he couldn’t leave. He had nothing. 

So he put it out of his mind. 

When their first year anniversary rolled around Buck made sure things were perfect , he had cleaned the house top to bottom and he was hoping now that things had settled between the move and the new job they would start the adoption.

He planned to ask him after they had dessert. He had cooked them a lasagna with garlic bread and a salad. There was wine to go with it and he had made a cake for after , hopefully to celebrate them adopting. 

“So , I was thinking that now that things have settled at work we could start looking into adoption.” Buck said as he placed the plate with cake in front of Doug. 

“Oh , well things aren’t really settled at work. They didn’t give me a raise.” Doug told him. 

“Babe , no. Why not?”

“Some asshole got it instead. They said he had been there longer , did more , all that shit. So I don’t think it’s the right time to file without that money.” 

“Oh.” Buck felt his heart break a little , he was so sure that they had waited long enough. 

“I’m sorry babe.” 

“It’s ok , you’re right anyway.” Buck grabbed a second slice of cake. 

“Do you really think you should have a second piece?” Doug asked as he got up to take his plate to the kitchen. 

Buck looked down at himself after Doug left the room. He had gained a little weight , but was it that bad? He put the cake back and started cleaning up the mess from dinner. He felt his eyes burn and told himself it was stupid to feel bad about one little comment. 

Still he vowed to start working out tomorrow. 

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“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Doug said in that deadly quiet voice as Buck came walking in the door panting. 

“I was running. Is everything ok , you’re home early?” he asked in concern. 

“Well , I came home to surprise you and what do I find an empty house.”

“I go running everyday at one with Bill from down the street.” Buck began to get nervous. 

Doug walked over to him , saying nothing. Buck watched him warily. Things had been ok recently , Doug had backed off on the comments about his weight. Buck had told him he was working out and losing the fat. He felt his heart racing in fear , he was never sure what Doug would do. 

“You are going to stop seeing that…man. Do you understand me?” 

“But we’re friends. His wife was just asking the other day if we wanted to come over for dinner one night.” Buck whispered. 

“Well , not anymore you’re not. You think I don’t know what’s happening there. First you’re friends then you’ll be kissing friends , he’ll be the poor confused straight boy you need to help figure out why he’s salivating over your ass.”

“That makes no sense , I love you and he is just a friend.” 

“All this working out has to be for someone. It sure as hell ain’t for me.” 

“Yes , it is and for me too. You kept saying things about my weight so I decided to do something about it.” 

“Well , don’t worry about it. I don’t care how you look. If you want to keep working out there must be someone you want to impress.” 

“No , I don’t. I just like doing the exercise and I like looking good for you.” 

“It ends now.” Doug pointed his finger at him. 

“Please , I…” 

Doug didn’t let him get any further. He cocked his arm back and punched him. Buck fell to the ground , half in the shock of things and half because of the force of the punch. He lay there holding his cheek , blood in his mouth where it had forced his teeth to tear into the flesh. He looked up at Doug in fear. 

“It stops now. No more exercising and no more Bill was it?” 

“Ok.” Buck whispered. 

Doug took off up the stairs to their room leaving Buck laying there on the floor. Slowly he sat up and just sat there. He had no idea what had just happened. When he heard the shower start he got up and made his way to the other bathroom to look at the damage. 

There was a little blood leaking out the corner of his mouth and the cheek was raised and red. He was sure by morning it would be puffed further out and starting to change colors. There was no way he could face anyone anytime soon. 

He walked out to the phone and dialed Bill. The phone call telling him that he was getting sick and wouldn’t be around was one of the few times he ever spoke to his friend. After that Doug mostly made sure that he knew Buck was busy. 

Doug came down the stairs as he was telling Bill he wouldn’t see him for a while. 

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After he stopped working out , the weight started coming back. He didn’t like the way he felt or looked , but he was scared to do anything about it. He tried dieting , eating only healthy foods. It worked a little , but most of the weight was still there. He knew that healthy eating and exercise was the only right way to lose weight , but he didn’t have that option. 

He began to hate the way he looked. He was watching the news one night with Doug when the answer came to him. They were doing a story on teens and anorexia. It was unhealthy , but only long term. If he could do it only long enough to drop those last twenty-five pounds he should be fine. 

The next day he looked the illness up and by dinner that night he was sticking his finger down his throat for the first time. By their two year anniversary he was struggling to quit the habit. 

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“I got a surprise for you.” Doug said as he came in the house. 

Buck merely turned to look at him , that at least didn’t hurt as much as getting up. Doug’s last temper fuelled beating had left his ribs bruised and blackened. He was on day three of couch rest , since it was the only place he could sleep. 

“Oh yeah.” he said , he rarely said more than he had to. He had learned that lesson this time. After he had corrected Doug on some story he was telling a co-worker at a party. 

“Close your eyes.” Doug told him and he obeyed immediately. 

He waited with shaking breath , he was still breathing shallower than normal and he was also worried that this was some cruel trick and Doug was going to punch him for something else he had done. He heard his footsteps come closer and a weird snuffling sound. 

“Ok , open them.” 

Buck opened his eyes , giving them a minute to adjust. Doug was standing in front of the couch with something reddish tan and white in his arms. It was small and Buck was having a hard time figuring out what it was. Then a pair of bat like ears popped up and he could see it’s little face.

“Oh that is the cutest little puppy I ever saw!” Buck exclaimed. The puppy turned at the sound of his voice. 

“I thought you’d like him.” Doug said placing him on his lap. 

“I love him. What’s his name?” 

“I think that’s up to you. Need to practice for our kids.” Buck felt his smile fade a little. 

He hadn’t thought about that in a while , wasn’t even sure they were still planning on kids. He looked into the almost orange eyes of the puppy on his lap and thought he reminded him of the disney movie with the dog and fox. His coloring made sense. 

“How about Copper?” 

“That’s perfect. Happy two year anniversary babe.” Doug kissed him and went to go get changed. 

Buck sat on the couch with Copper thinking that it had been a long two years , they had felt like a hundred with the pain he had felt. He wasn’t sure if it was worth it.  

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“No please , don’t hurt him!” Buck screamed as Doug grabbed the pup by the collar and threw him toward the door. 

“Get off of me.” Doug told him as he shook his hand off his arm. 

“It was an accident , he’s only eight months old. He’s still a baby and learning.” Buck pleaded with him. 

“I don’t care , he destroyed my shoes and now I have to go get new ones for work tomorrow. Last time it was my wallet and the time before that my belt. This is the last straw.” Doug grabbed Copper as he reached the door and drug him through it. 

“Where are you taking him?” Buck cried , tears streaming down his face. 

“I’m taking care of it that’s all you need to know.” Doug said and slammed the door behind him.

Buck hadn’t even gotten to say goodbye. He had tried hard to train Copper , but the pup was dense. He loved chewing things , but unfortunately he only loved chewing Doug’s things. Buck sat down in the living room , crying and waiting. 

Two hours later Doug came in carrying a new pair of boots and no Copper in sight. Buck jumped up and went to him. He had dozed off and his tears had dried on his face making it feel weird and tight. He slowed as he came to Doug at the closet putting the new shoes up. 

“Where is Copper?” he asked quietly.

“He’s gone. Little fucker won’t be chewing anymore boots.” Doug said and pushed past him to the stairs. 

Buck felt the tears come again. How could he have killed such a sweet creature as Copper? Buck watched him climb the stairs and for the first time felt hatred in his heart for the man that he had once loved so deeply. 

He was glad now that they had never adopted , how would he treat a child if this was how he treated Buck and puppies? He slowly followed him up the stairs thinking that things had changed too much.

It wasn’t worth it anymore. He began to plan.

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It had been hard. He had no job , no family to turn to and no friends. He did have all the spare change he could find. His only goal was getting out and away from Doug , far away. He didn’t care about food , clothes or a place to stay. He only cared about escape. 

Nearly three years and countless beatings later , he was ready. He had squirrelled away nearly six hundred dollars. He had just enough for a bus ticket and some food. He was nervous and scared. He had only to wait for Doug to go to work and he would grab the small duffle with some clothes and the money he had hidden and he was gone. 

“Bye babe. See you later.” he managed to tell Doug without his voice cracking. 

“I’ll see you later. Behave.” he said and kissed him , patting his bruised cheek lightly to remind him what would happen if he didn’t.

Buck watched Doug drive away to work. He stood there for ten more minutes , sure that Doug knew somehow and was waiting for him to leave. Finally he convinced his legs to move. He had hidden the bag in the washroom behind the washer. Doug never went in there. 

“You can do it , turn the knob.” he told himself as he stood holding the doorknob. It was a long walk to the bus station and he didn’t have all day , Doug was off at four.

By the time he reached the station he was sweating and tired. He grabbed a drink from the vending machine and went to the ticket counter to purchase the key to his freedom. He was almost there. The woman called next and he stepped up. 

“How can I help you today?” she asked without looking up.

“I need a ticket to California please. One way.”

“That will be four hundred and eighty two dollars.” she told him punching in the info. 

He counted out the money and handed it over to her. She took it and re-counted it to make sure. She placed it in the register and turned back to the computer. 

“Name on the ticket please.” 

“Can we skip that part?” he asked his voice trembling. She looked at him for the first time , her eyes going to his bruised face. 

“We cannot , the ticket has to have a name Mr. Smith.” she said and typed something. The ticket printed out and she handed it to him. 

“Thank you and have a wonderful trip.” she smiled at him. 

Buck walked off to the side and looked at the ticket in his hand. Abraham Smith. She had given him a fake name and not the same old John Doe or John Smith. He felt his heart lift. His bus left in ten minutes so he made his way to it and claimed a seat in the back. After everyone was on they pulled out of the station headed for the interstate and California. 

As they left town they passed the construction sight Doug was working at , Buck looked and saw him standing there and he smiled as they passed right by without him knowing. He had escaped and was finally free. 

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When he made it to California , Los Angeles to be exact, he had twenty dollars to his name and not a soul to help him. He spent the nights he could find a bed in shelters. The bruising on his face faded slowly but his spirit to make it on his own never did. 

‘Financial aid available. Find your career now at Ridge Technical College.’ the flyer said. 

He made his way down to the address listed on the flyer. He needed a career , his job working at McDonald’s was getting him nowhere fast. He followed the signs for the financial aid office and found her unbusy at the moment. 

“How can I help you?” she asked as he sat.

“I want to find a career , but I don’t have a lot of money.” 

“Let’s see what we can do. Tell me your story and we’ll see what we’re working with.” she smiled at him.

“I married my high school boyfriend five years ago , but after years of being beaten I’m here trying to get my life back.” 

“Oh my God , that’s awful. I can get you the help you need.” she told him.

Three hours later he was approved for complete financial aid. He would continue to work when he wasn’t in class and get on his feet. He held the brochure in his hands as he sat outside the office and looked through all the options. 

There were so many different choices. He wasn’t sure how to decide. So he opened it up so all the choices were spread out before him. He laid it down on the ground , crouching next to it and closed his eyes. He waved his hand around making sure he didn’t peek. He stopped and lowered his finger to the ground touching the paper and took a deep breath. This was it. 

He opened his eyes to see what fate had in store for him. His heart was racing with excitement. He was about to change his life and he was sweating , probably looking like a looney kneeling on the ground. He followed his arm down to his finger tip. He sucked in a gasp of air at the words. 

‘Firefighting training.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment when you have no kudos left to give , it makes me happy. Also if you would like to check out my completely original characters and story telling ability head over to Amazon and get your copy of my novel Full Moon Painted Black by R.J. Kenyon. That's my last shameless plugging of my novel. Back to the story folks leave comments!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	8. Eddie Begins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I so loved writing this and creating the backstory of out two favorite Diaz boys! I know I said Christmas after Eddie Begins but i think I should do Christopher's birthday , thanksgiving and then Christmas...in two chapters. Leave me comments!

Eddie was leaving his last class of the day when the flyer was shoved in his hand. He didn’t see who it was , only a flash of blonde hair disappearing into the crowd. He never really got a good look at any of the people who thrust party flyers into his hand every week. 

‘End of week party! Amber Grayson’s house Friday night 10-whenever it ends! Keg and booze will be there. Make sure you are too!’

Eddie just sighed , he hated all these parties every weekend , but it was kind of required that he be there. At least if he wanted to stay popular and not end up at the bottom of the food chain he did. Personally he didn’t care if he was popular , it was more that his peers were vicious when it came to those they saw below them. He never joined them in taunting them , but he definitely didn’t want to join them. 

So he went home and got ready. 

The party was in full swing when he arrived , like it would ever be any different. They usually started the party early and rocked out until the cops busted it up or the parents actually did , which was rare. They were rich and didn’t care what their kids did as long as they didn’t embarrass them and get arrested or something.

“Diaz! Bout time you got here man , there is major action to be had.” Jared yelled as he walked in. 

“Oh yeah.” he said as he made it through the crowd to him. That was another thing he hated , his friends threw women at him left and right. Not that he didn’t like women , it was more that he preferred men over them , not that his friends knew that. 

“Yep , Jessica was excited that you were coming.” 

“Well , I’m going to get a drink man.” Eddie said and weaved his way through the throng to the keg. 

He was pouring a cup and contemplating how long he really had to stay when a pair of soft hands covered his face. He managed to hold in the groan and play along. College was too far away , he was ready to stop pretending that he was something everyone else wanted him to be. Ever since things with Victor Sanchez had gone down the relationship with his parents was strained. 

“Guess who?” the owner of said hands whispered in his ear. 

“I think Jessica Martin?” Eddie guessed , she had been at him like a dog with a bone all year. 

“Yes! That was pretty good Eddie Diaz.” she smiled as she came around to face him. 

“Well , I know voices.” he said awkwardly. He hated dealing with turning all these girls down and making sure that gossip didn’t start about his lack of female companionship.

“So you wanna dance?” she asked.

“Uh , I really can’t dance.” 

“We could go sit somewhere and talk.” 

“I think Jeff was looking for me , something about the game next Friday.” 

“Oh , well find me after.” she gave that little pout girls did.

He turned and disappeared into the masses. He figured he might be able to get away with two hours. He could wander around talking to the guys for a while until they got to asking questions then he’d move along. He managed to do that just fine most of the time , then they wanted to do a bunch of shots and he couldn’t get out of it. 

“Diaz you are fucked up! Where’s Jessica , you need some lovin’?” Jared yelled.

“No , I’m good man.” Eddie said as he pushed away from him and right into someone , their drink splashing over the both of them. 

“Hey watch it asshole.” the person said and Eddie looked over at the girl.

“I’m sorry.” he said grabbing some napkins and handing them to her. 

She looked at him warily and he tried to place her , he knew most of the girls. They had all thrown themselves at him at one time or another. She was new or at least he had never seen her before. She was staring at him and he thought for sure she was going to deck him with the way she was looking at him. 

“It’s fine. Should expect to get one drink dumped on you if you’re at a party. I’m Shannon.” 

“Eddie and I really am sorry about that.” 

“It’s fine. So tell me about you Eddie , I should know about the guy knocking girls drinks on them.” she laughed at him and he couldn’t help but smile back.

They found themselves in a closed off room , the noise level of the party preventing them from hearing each other anywhere else. Eddie learned that she was Shannon Thompson and she wasn’t familiar because she didn’t go to Liberty High , she was from Jasper High. She had a second cousin that went to Liberty , but Eddie didn’t know him he was a freshman. Shannon just liked to come hang out with him at parties when she had a free weekend. 

“So Eddie Diaz , what do you want to do in four months when we graduate?” she asked him as they drank some more. 

“I’m not really sure , maybe the military.” 

“That sounds exciting. I respect a man in uniform.” she smirked at him and even though he had too much to drink , he liked the way she smiled at him. 

“Oh you do , do you?” he licked his lips. 

“Yes sir.” she said and leaned forward to capture his lips. 

They kissed slowly , uncoordinated from the booze and each tentative of the other. He knew that doing anything with anyone while either of them was intoxicated was a bad idea. Yet , he didn’t seem to care at the moment. Kisses led to more as they often do , clothes were shed and drunken sex was had. Eddie barely remembered it in the morning as he grabbed his clothes , found a slip of paper and left a note before slipping out the door and going home. 

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Eddie didn’t think about that night much after it happened. He felt ashamed that he had done something so irresponsible. He kept focused on his school work and football as the end of the year approached. 

“Hello?” he answered his phone after he climbed into his truck after class. 

“Is this Eddie Diaz?” a female voice asked. 

“Yes , who is this?” he didn’t recognize the number. 

“I don’t know if you remember , we were kind of drunk that night , but this is Shannon Thompson.” 

Eddie felt his heart drop , this had to be bad , she hadn’t contacted him in the month since the party. He took a deep breath and tried to calm his heart and his stomach which had turned quite spectacularly. 

“Yeah , I remember. How have you been?” he asked hoping for casual even though his heart was in his throat and his voice cracking. 

“Well , that’s kind of why I’m calling. I don’t want to be that girl , but uh...that night we uh..what I mean to say is…” 

“Are you sure?” he asked helping her out. 

“I took five tests. Either I’m pregnant or the pregnancy test company had the biggest batch of bad tests ever.” 

He closed his eyes. This was the last thing he needed , just about to graduate high school and a father. His parents would be equal parts happy and disappointed , happy that he was with a woman at all and disappointed that it was long enough to become a father before eighteen. 

“What do you want to do , I’ll support anything you decide.” 

“My parents raised me in the church , no matter how bad being a teen mom is , being a child killer is worse. I can’t have an abortion and my parents would never let any blood of theirs disappear with strangers , so adoption is out.” 

“So we keep it. Have you told them yet?” 

“No , I thought as the other half of this miracle you should know first.” 

“How do you want to do this? We could tell them all at the same time , separately. Fair warning though , I’m sure my parents will insist that I do the honorable thing and marry you.” 

“Oddly enough I think mine will too. So I guess we pick a day and time and tell them that we are having a child and getting married.” 

“How’s your schedule tomorrow?” 

“Free , I can’t believe this is happening.” 

“Me either , I was sure we used something , but we were pretty drunk.” 

“We did , I saw it the next morning. I was on the pill too so even if not there was something protecting us. I guess this kid was just meant to be.” 

“Must be a pretty important person then.” 

“Yeah , thank you for taking this so well.”

“I know what I did and take responsibility when I’m wrong.” 

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“Yeah , your house or mine?”

“Maybe a neutral place , in public so they can’t kill us.” 

“Sure text me a place and we’ll be there.” 

“Goodbye , Eddie.”

“Goodbye , Shannon.” 

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Eddie had told him that there was something he wanted to tell them and someone he wanted them to meet. They had looked at him oddly , his mother calculating in her gaze and he was sure that she suspected. They were meeting Shannon and her family at the local family restaurant , oddly fitting considering the circumstances. 

“Mom , Dad this is Shannon Thompson.” Eddie said as they approached the table where she and her parents were sitting , they looked impatient. 

“Hi , Mr. and Mrs. Diaz. These are my parents , Fred and Martha.”

“Hello , I’m Julio and my wife Luciana.” his father introduced them and everyone shook hands after they took their seats. 

“So I want to know what we’re all doing here , no offense.” Fred said. 

“Daddy , we wanted to talk to all of you about something that happened.” 

“Aw shit , your pregnant aren’t you?” he asked. 

“Well , yes , but see we both used protection , the pill and a condom , but this baby was determined. 

“Mijo ,  why didn't you tell us you were dating?" His mother asked.

"We aren't. There was a party…" he admitted.

"So you managed to knock my daughter up from a one night stand. That'll make a wonderful how mommy and daddy met story." Fred said. 

"I know it's not ideal , but I intend to take responsibility for my actions. We'll get married and I'll support my family." Eddie looked him in the eye , prepared for his rejection.

Fred and Martha looked at each other. Eddie waited , Shannon smiling encouragingly at him from across the table. 

"Welcome to the family I suppose." 

Over the next few months plans were made , dates set and venues booked. Eddie and Shannon split the time between school , doctor appointments , wedding plan and getting to know each other more. Yet Eddie kept quiet about his preference for men.

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Two months after graduation they were married in a small outdoor wedding. Shannon was six months pregnant with his son , Christopher Anthony Diaz. He would be a Halloween baby , due in October. 

They had their eye on a small two bedroom house and Eddie was enlisted and waiting for orders , he had finished basic training right before the wedding. 

Eddie was in a rented tux and Shannon in a white sundress in her aunt's backyard. Her family was still upset that she was going to be a mother so young , but the ultrasound pictures and feeling the baby move was winning them over.

Eddie fell in love with his son more and more each time he saw him. If only things were as easy with Shannon.

They were barely more than strangers that had one night together. He was not as attracted to her but for the sake of Christopher he was trying. 

Shannon was having a hard time so at least sex was out of the picture. Eddie dreaded when it wasn't. He couldn't get drunk every time. 

"Do you Eddie Antonio Diaz take Shannon Elizabeth Thompson to be your lawfully wedded wife?" 

"I do." Eddie said , feeling his stomach clench at the thought of the rest of his life with someone he didn't actually choose. 

He smiled throughout the rest of the wedding , no one noticed it was faked.

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"Where are you going?" Shannon said through the tears. 

"They said we'd find out when we land. I have no idea." Eddie told her.

"I never thought you'd really get deployed. I thought…I don't know what I thought." She placed her hands on her swollen belly and cried harder. 

"Please don't cry. I'll be fine. They might let me come home in a month for his birth." 

"I'll miss you." She told him. 

"I'll miss you too." Eddie held his arms open for her to hug him.

She took a step into his arms and sagged against him. He felt guilty that he wouldn't miss her as much as she would miss him. In truth he was kind of glad he was getting deployed , he worried about after Christopher was born , how they would handle their relationship. 

He left her on the doorstep , taking a cab to the base. From there he took a plane with a hundred others to a place they didn't know , far from their families and where everyone would be trying to kill them.

They landed in a dark , dusty strip where the air was hot and it was lit by flood lights. When they filed off the plane , tired and sore , they were met by the base commander Sergeant Striker. 

"Welcome to hell gentleman. Also known as Kandahar , Afghanistan." 

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"Fuck , we've got incoming!" Roberts yelled as they hunkered down behind a rock formation.

"Ours or theirs?" Eddie yelled as he checked his rounds. 

"Hard to say." 

They were to clear the road between green base and blue base. The road was always needing cleared , insurgents planting IEDs almost as soon as they pulled them up. 

They'd been out about half way between bases when they were ambushed. They had been outside the truck at the time , this crevice was all the protection they had. 

"Holy shit , someone must love us. It's ours." Roberts smiled. 

The gun fire went silent , usually a good thing but Eddie knew it wasn't. They were gonna ambush them as well. They wanted the higher body count. 

"We got to warn them. They have no idea what they're driving into." Eddie peeked over the rock. 

They were nearly there , time was running out and with no position for the enemy it was going to be blind luck if they made it out alive. He had only one idea , it was crazy but maybe they needed crazy. 

He lifted the gun , lined up his shot and took out the mirror of the lead truck. The truck slammed on the brakes. He watched with bated breath , hoping they would realize their truck was empty. 

"Think they get the idea?" Roberts asked.

"Hope so." 

Suddenly shots rang out , rounds hitting the stopped trucks. Eddie had no idea how many of them were surrounding them , hell bent on killing them but he knew he had a son to get home to. 

His eyes scanned the terrain along the road , searching for muzzle flashes. The truck was fitted with bulletproof glass and the exterior armour plated , safe from anything less than armour piercing rounds and tank fire. They had time.

He counted five separate muzzle flashes. The trick was going to be taking them out without attracting their fire. 

"There's five. Two to the right , one to the left and two on the ridge above." He told Roberts. 

Roberts looked out over the edge , clocking the positions as they continued to fire at the trucks. There were three trucks in the convoy , probably transporting ammo and other essentials between bases. 

"You take the left , I'll take the right and then we do the middle." Roberts suggested. 

"On three...one , two , three!" Eddie yelled as they turned and opened fire on the areas with the insurgents. 

They had about five seconds before they turned their guns on their hiding spot. Eddie prayed they would miss them. He moved back and forth over his areas , hoping they were dead. He crouched back down to reload. 

"Shit I'm running low! What about you?!" He yelled to Roberts , thankfully the shots seemed to be less than before, so some of them were neutralized. 

There was no answer so he looked over at Roberts. He had to swallow the bile at what he saw. 

Roberts was missing half his face , slouched against one of the rocks. Roberts was engaged to be married when he got home , back to Illinois. Looks like she was a widow before a wife.

He grabbed what spare ammo he could and peeked over the rocks to see which shooters were left. Their were only two. Eddie took a deep breath and opened fire , letting out a yell of anger and hurt and frustration as he did. He and Roberts had made fast friends as soon as his boots hit the dirt. 

The shots died down and Eddie finally stopped firing. There was silence , after three minutes he was sure they were all dead. Slowly he left his position of safety and made his way to the trucks. 

"Thanks for saving our asses man! Where's the rest of the road crew?" The driver asked as they climbed out the truck once it was apparent they were clear. 

"We were out , checking for IEDs in front of the truck when they hit. Roberts and I took shelter over there. I didn't see where Johnson and Kravinski went to." Eddie told them looking around for any sign of them. 

"Where's Roberts?" A guy named Macavoy asked.

"They got him , half his face is gone." Eddie said in a hushed tone , his voice cracking and eyes burning. 

They searched the area , finding Johnson and Kravinski off the side of the road not far from the truck. They were riddled with bullets. Eddie had to turn away. 

"We'll load them in your truck and we'll all go along the road to blue base. I'm sorry about your team , but we need you to get us there. Ace you drive while he works." Macavoy said. 

Together they loaded up his dead friends and made their way down the road. Two hours and four IEDs later they made it to blue base. The bodies were unloaded and prepared for transport home and Eddie gave his account of what happened. 

A day later he was on a flight home to meet his son , the bodies of his team and friends riding with him. 

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"Are you ok , I got here as soon as I could?" Eddie asked as he walked in the door of the hospital room. 

"Oh , Eddie , it was so hard. He got stuck and they had to pull him out. I was so scared!" Shannon cried as she reached for him , sobbing. 

"I'm sorry. They had to wait for a transport flight before I could fly out. There was weather over Georgia that forced us to land. I got here as soon as I could." 

"Would you like to meet your son?" She asked as he pulled back from the hug. 

She looked over to the other side of the bed , the hospital bassinet beside her. He lay there , already tanned in his blue hat wrapped like a burrito. He had a patch of black hair peeking out his hat , a green binky in his mouth. 

Eddie had never loved anyone or anything as much or as fast as he did his son. His heart swelled as he looked at him laying there , his eyes never leaving his face. He placed a hand out and ran a finger down his cheek , smiling as Christopher snuffled toward his hand.

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He was allowed three days time with his family. He enjoyed them , learning the sound of his son's cries and the smell of him. He hardly let Shannon do anything. Trying to imprint his voice and scent on him so when he returned again he would know him. 

He finished out the last stretch of his tour smoother than the first bit. There were new team members , but no more ambushes or deaths after he returned. 

He came home after his first tour when Christopher was one year old. He had three months leave before returning for his second tour. He had enlisted with a two tour minimum. 

Shannon loved having him home , mainly because he never let her do anything with Christopher. As much as she loved their son it was nice to have a break. When Eddie was gone she had her mother and father helping , but they helped with the house stuff and only took Christopher when she was overwhelmed. They said she had to learn to be a mother and it wouldn't happen if they did it for her.

It was a month before his leave was up when at a checkup the doctor told them he was concerned about Christopher and wanted to run some tests. They sat through hours of testing , holding hands and waiting for the worst. 

"It's as I feared. He has cerebral palsy. But don't worry he can lead a fulfilling life." The doctor came back and Eddie felt his world crumble a little. 

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As Christopher grew the differences became apparent. Eddie watched them in video calls , pictures and the letters Shannon sent. 

Shannon grew angrier with him and he dreaded being home more and more. As much as he loved Christopher , he wasn't sure he could live with Shannon and her anger. Before he left for home after his second tour , he signed up for another one despite the guilt he felt. 

"How can you leave me here with him alone after I've been dealing with him this whole time?!" Shannon yelled when he told her they signed him up for another tour. 

"I don't get to pick. They tell me what to do and I do it or I go to jail." Eddie felt bad about lying , but he couldn't deal with Shannon not yet. 

"Daddy.." A voice came from the bedroom down the hall. 

"You ok bud?" Eddie asked as he went to the bedroom of his two year old. 

"I woked up." He said. 

"I'm sorry bud , go back to sleep ok." 

"Ohtay daddy." Christopher said and rolled over. 

Eddie shut the door and went back out to Shannon. He was tired , he had been home for three days now and had waited to tell her he was going back till now. 

"I won't be a single mother all the time." Shannon said as she walked out their room and threw a pillow on the couch. 

Most of his leave was spent on that couch. He didn't mind , he was still not in love with her as much as he felt he should be. Six months home and he was gone for another tour , his longest yet. 

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"Diaz , the colonel wants to see you." 

Eddie was two months away from the end of his tour. He was slightly worried that they would want him to do more. He had had a good run. He had been given a silver star for saving the convoy during his first tour and as a medic he was valuable to the war effort. 

"You wanted to see me sir." Eddie said as he arrived at the colonel's office. 

"Yeah , come in and have a seat." 

Eddie sat down wondering what this could be about. He had kept his head down , made sure there were no complaints from his superiors. He was ready for his tour to be over , tired of seeing men and women die in front of him. 

"I got a call from the states , your in laws. They had some bad news and wanted us to be aware of the situation."

"Is everything ok sir?" Eddie sat forward in concern.

"Mostly. They called to tell us that your wife left. She dropped off your son with them and disappeared. Her parents said she left a note , couldn't handle being a single parent to a child with his disability. I'm sorry Diaz."

"I...I can't believe she could leave him." Eddie said in shock. 

"We've discussed things here and with your in-laws , you'll finish your two months and then you're out."

"Thank you sir. I was ready to be done anyway."

"You've been an exceptional soldier son. We've been glad to have you , but now your son needs you to be an exceptional father." 

Eddie finished out his tour and headed home. Unsure on what he would find when he got there. He had video chatted with Christopher and he was handling living with his grandparents fine so far. Eddie was sure he didn't realize his mom was gone yet.

"Daddy!" Christopher yelled as he used his tiny crutches to make his way to him. Eddie stopped halfway and let him finish his journey. 

"I missed you bud." He hugged him and kissed his nose. 

"I've been with nana and poppa. We have so much fun." He told him. 

"I know bud , let's get home ok." He didn't want to have this conversation in public. 

They made it home , her parents staying and making dinner while Eddie listened to Christopher tell him all the things he had done and gotten while he was away. 

"Momma needs to get home so she can make dinner instead of nana. Nana cooks at her house , momma cooks here." Christopher said after telling him about his new glasses. 

"Bud , your momma left. She had to go away for a little while ok. She still loves you very much , but she won't be here with is for a while."

"Like when you go away on tour?" He asked.

"Yeah , kind of like that."

"But I don't want momma to be gone. I want her here now!" Christopher began to cry.

"It's ok bud , I'm home for good. I'll be here no matter what. I love you." 

Christopher sobbed for his mother , his grandparents coming to stand at the door. He looked up at them , at a loss as to what to do to make it better. They shrugged. Finally Christopher cried himself to sleep , Eddie felt like crying for him. He hated that he was so upset. 

"He didn't really understand before that she was gone. Now it's going to get harder." Martha told him. 

"I know. I hate to think how bad it'll be once I get a job. Thankfully I have enough money to delay that for a while." 

"Any idea what you're going to do?" Fred asked. 

"I was thinking take my medic training and join the fire department. I'll have to do the firefighting training and make sure my medical knowledge is up to par though." 

"So school , that should give you time to get him used to the new way of living." She smiled at him.

"Yeah. What about your parents?" Fred asked.

"They side with Shannon. They never really bonded with Christopher though. I think they couldn't deal with my decisions and blame me for everything. They haven't seen much of him before or after she left." 

"The bad side of taking a job like this is they'll send me wherever there's an opening. We might have to move." 

"We'll deal with that."

They helped him deal with Christopher while he completed the training he needed to be a firefighter. It was tough , especially when he would scream when Eddie walked out the door. His mother had scarred him against people leaving. Now he was convinced walking out the door meant never coming back. Finally he calmed down and believed that Eddie would always come back , it only took three years to get them there.

"I just got the news." He told them all when he got home from picking up dinner. 

"Well , don't leave us in suspense!" 

"Yeah , don't leave us in suspense." Christopher teased , he had just turned seven. 

"They assigned me to station 118 in…Los Angeles , California!" 

Fred and Martha spent the time with Christopher while Eddie packed and made the arrangements to set up a house for them. He had some family in California that could help with Christopher , they hadn't shunned him when his parents told them about his stunt with Victor.

He had three months till he had to report for duty at the 118. They had given him time to move and get settled in L.A. He was excited to start someplace new , even Christopher was happy. 

Maybe the fates had something for him in California.

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	9. Holiday Woes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. I'm in central Florida so we spent quite a bit of time watching and waiting to see where Dorian was going. Thankfully it didn't come our way , but I wish it had spared the Bahamas too. My thoughts go out to those in those areas , it's never an easy thing deciding to stay or go. Dealing with Hurricanes is kind of like shooting an arrow straight up in the sky , you have to stand there till almost the last second until you know where it's going to land to avoid getting hit. Hope you enjoy and leave lots of comments!

"What do you want to do for your birthday Christopher?" Buck asked.

"You know it's my birthday?!" Christopher asked in awe. 

"Course we do little man." Hen replied as she brought a plate of grilled cheese sandwiches to the table at the station. 

"Dad told you didn't he?" Christopher laughed.

"Yeah he did. It's cool to have a Halloween birthday , I wish my birthday was around Halloween." Buck nodded sagely. 

Christopher was at the station after school waiting for Carla to swing by and pick him up. It was only every once in a while that she had to pick him up from the station. But the crew loved getting to see him so they looked forward to those days. 

"So what kind of party are you having?" Chimney asked.

"I always do Halloween party. Everyone gets to dress up and dad doesn't have to decorate again." 

"It is easier if I already decorated for Halloween." Eddie shrugged.

Buck smirked at him , he was so cute when he was in dad mode. He loved watching him with Christopher , hell he loved watching him anytime. Since their little night of confessions things hadn’t changed much. They worked together the same , they hadn’t really had the spare time to be together and work on furthering their relationship. 

“You all are coming right?” Christopher asked. 

“I think we can all make it.” Bobby said. 

“Where’s my favorite little birthday boy?” Carla called out as she came up the steps. 

“I’m the only birthday boy.” Christopher said. 

“Still my favorite.” 

“Hey , I thought I was your favorite.” Buck pouted. 

“I love you Buckaroo , but even you can’t compete with this face. 

“See you later , bud. You be good for Carla.” Eddie told him as he gave him a hug and kiss while helping him down the stairs to go with Carla to the house. 

Once Christopher was in the car and they pulled off Eddie went back in the station and to the bathroom. He walked in , used the facilities and washed his hands. As he was drying them the door opened and he looked up to find Buck walking in. 

“Anyone else in here?” Buck whispered as the door closed behind him. 

“No , just me.” Eddie replied , confused look on his face. 

Buck smiled that big , wide smile. The one that made Eddie’s heart race and the blood flow south. He watched as Buck turned the lock on the door and stalked toward him in the mirror. He turned as Buck reached him and stopped. 

“Hi.” Eddie said. 

“Hi.” Buck replied , feeling kind of shy now that he was here in front of Eddie. 

“So , locking the door?” Eddie looked at him. 

“I want to make sure no one comes in and catches us , I know that you want to keep it quiet until things are worked out with Shannon.” 

“You are so sweet.” Eddie smiled. 

Buck leaned forward and hesitated for a second then finished closing the distance and pressed his lips to Eddie’s. Eddie groaned at the heat and reached out to place his hands on Buck’s hips , pulling him toward him. Buck gasped as his groin pressed against Eddie’s , pressing him against the counter top. 

“Eddie…” Buck whispered. 

“I know , but we gotta stop before this gets out of hand.” Eddie squeezed his hips as he tried to calm down. 

“I really can’t wait till we have some time off and alone. I’ll hang here , you go ahead out first.” Buck sighed as he pecked him on the lips. 

Eddie adjusted his pants and then walked out of the bathroom , leaving Buck standing in front of the mirror , willing his hardon to go down. It was going to be a long day. 

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Christopher insisted that his party wait until everyone could make it. He wanted family there even if it meant a few weeks of waiting. Everyone was invited and brought him tons of presents , from superheroes to educational things like his new favorite book series , Captain Underpants.

Shannon was not invited since Eddie was still keeping that fact that she was home from Christopher. He wanted to make sure that she never interfered in their life again. But Carla was still working on getting everything he would need to make sure that he would win a custody case. Eddie was just hoping things were settled before she asked for more than a date. 

“So how are things with she-who-must-not-be-named?” Buck asked as he stood with Eddie watching Christopher play with his new superhero action figures with Hen’s son. 

“Carla is trying to get things set , she hasn’t come bugging me since I saw her after the interview at the school.” 

“That’s good. She’s not going to win this war , we won’t let her.” Buck said fiercely. 

“I like this overprotective side of you.” Eddie said , aroused at protective Buck in action. 

“We all love him , he’s ours.” Buck told him and went to grab another drink. 

Eddie followed him into the kitchen , everyone else was in the other room and Eddie took a moment to thank whoever for the moment alone. He had felt his heart skip a beat when Buck had said ‘he’s ours’. He automatically thought about Buck becoming Christopher’s other dad. He ached to have that , to feel complete in a way that he never had with Shannon. 

“Buck , what you said…” he started.

“Yeah , what part?” Buck turned to face him. 

“I love that you love Christopher , hearing you say he’s ours...I thought how that really could be.” 

“He’s a great kid , anyone would love him.” Buck whispered , embarrassed. 

“Hey , dad!” Christopher yelled and broke the moment. 

The rest of the day Buck kept thinking about what Eddie had said. He wanted that , he wanted to be a father. That fire was reignited within him. He wanted that with Eddie. 

He wanted to be Christopher’s dad.  

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Before they knew it Thanksgiving was just around the corner. They were all working on the actual day , it was hard to get holidays off , they were the busiest times. They were having a whole dinner at the station , their families planning dinner together when they were off. Carla was off , Christopher spending the day with the family till Eddie was off. He had cousins to play with. 

Things with Shannon had been a little strained since the birthday party , she was pissed that she wasn’t invited , even though she knew that Eddie hadn’t told Christopher she was in town. She had demanded that he take her out on a date , but he had been angry after she got done bitching at me and he told her to leave. 

“Eddie you have a visitor.” Chimney said as Eddie was putting the last dish on the table , some bacon ranch potato salad. 

“Uh…” Eddie looked lost , he knew that his family wasn’t coming up here today. He started to worry about something happening to Christopher. 

“Hi.” Shannon said as she came up the stairs. 

Eddie felt his anger flare. He shot a look to Buck , he knew he had told him about the fight he had with her. Buck was the only one that knew what was going on. Eddie saw the question in Buck’s eyes , knew that he was offering what little help he could. The whole situation was so fucked up. He was starting this wonderful new relationship and he couldn’t even tell anyone because his bitch of a wife would take his son away.

“What are you doing here?” Eddie asked , trying to keep his tone light despite his anger. 

“I was in the neighborhood and didn’t have any other holiday plans. It’s been a bit since we saw each other last , I figured you would want to spend Thanksgiving together.” she simpered. 

“Who is this Eddie? Don’t be rude , introduce us.” Bobby asked as they all stood staring at the two of them. 

“This is Shannon.” Eddie began. 

“I’m his wife.” she said as she walked next to him and grabbed his arm , smiling the whole time. 

“You mean to tell us that he managed to get a smoking hot woman like you?” Chimney teased. 

Eddie felt like hitting something. She knew how to fuck with him , there was no way for him to object or deny things without making a scene. He felt helpless , angry and sick to his stomach. Especially at the thought that Buck was going to have to sit through whatever she was going to do. Maybe Bobby would tell her it was the crew only. 

“Come join us , we’d love to learn more about you.” Bobby offered her a seat. 

“You guys are so sweet. I’d love to get to know all of you.” 

The rest of the evening Eddie said as little as possible , just sitting there listening to the bullshit that was spewing out of Shannon’s mouth. Buck kept his eyes on Eddie , knowing that she was pissing him off , but he had to go with things until he could get custody. 

“You are welcome here anytime , Shannon.” Bobby said as she was preparing to leave.

“Thank you so much.” she smiled at them.

“I don’t get how you got that woman , she is out of your league.” Chimney laughed. 

“You don’t know the half of it.” Eddie whispered. 

He walked off to the bathroom leaving the other’s confused at his behavior. Buck waited till they all moved on to other things and he went after Eddie. He knew he was poised to blow after enduring all that. He found Eddie hunched over the sink in the bathroom. 

“Are you okay?” he asked as he walked closer to him. 

“I...I love my son , but I wish to God his mother was gone. I don’t understand why she has to ruin my life like this.” Eddie voiced his frustration. 

“I don’t know either but I promise you she’s not ruining anything. I’m still here , I know the score and I’m staying in the game.” 

“How did I get so lucky to have someone as understanding as you?” Eddie looked at him in awe. 

“I was just born this way I guess.” Buck smiled that smile Eddie loved. 

“I want to be with you , out with you where everyone can see how lucky I am. I want this charade with Shannon over.” 

“It won’t last forever , Carla is going to work her magic and then we’ll be together. The three of us.” Buck pecked him on the lips , conscious of the fact that he hadn’t locked the door. 

“I can’t wait to have that life.” Eddie said resting his forehead against Buck’s and wrapping him in a hug. 

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The days and weeks that followed were tough on Eddie and Buck. Each wanting to be together , but having to play Shannon’s game. She kept stopping by the house , the station and popping up anywhere and everywhere. She respected the no Christopher rule , but she abused the free Eddie rule she had forced on him. 

“I don’t really have time right now for this.” Eddie said as she once again showed up at the station. 

“I’ve held up my end of the bargain , I told the school what they wanted to hear. Now it’s your turn.” 

“I still don’t think it’s the right time to let Christopher know that you are here. It was so hard on him before , he can’t handle that again.” 

“I didn’t mean that. I want the dating. That was my price for this , to try to make things work with us.” 

“I told you that I wasn’t interested in that. You are the one who won’t listen.” Eddie growled at her , thankful they had taken this conversation outside.

“I think you’re wrong. Either way that was the deal. If you don’t want to hold up your end of the deal then I can just make my way to the police station and the courthouse.” she threatened. 

“Fine! What do you want?”

“Take me out on a date. Tomorrow night. That’s the first one , we’ll set more up later.” 

“I suppose you want me to plan and pay for things.” 

“That is how a date works.” 

“I’ll text you the details. Now go away and leave me alone.” Eddie crossed his arms over his chest. 

“See you tomorrow.” she said and pecked him on the cheek.

Eddie went back in the station , trying to think of something that would make her happy and not give him more of a headache than he would already have. He had a grimace on his face when he joined the others at the table for lunch.

“What was all that about?” Chimney asked.

“She wanted to talk to me about a date tomorrow night.” he gave Buck a look. 

“So where you taking her stud?” Hen chuckled. 

“I don’t know.” 

“There’s a nice restaurant over on la cienega.” Bobby offered.

“Send me the name.” Eddie sighed. 

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The next night Eddie sat across from Shannon , wishing that he were here with Buck instead. Carla had come over before he left and hadn’t made much progress on getting him custody. She was still figuring out all the things he would need and need to do before he could get custody. 

“So how have you been?” Shannon asked. 

"Do you really care?" Shannon continued staring at him.

"Fine. Things are good. Christopher is loving school and hanging out with Hen and Athena's kids." 

"So others get to see him , people who aren't family yet I have to wait?" 

"They didn't give birth to him then abandon him." Eddie glared at her.

"You left me alone with him for years while you went off to do what you wanted."

"I went where they sent me and the pay was good. I saw people die , felt the life leave them. I washed their blood from my hands. Not any part of that was what I wanted." 

"I'm sorry we ended up back at this point. We always dig up the past."

"All the more reason we shouldn't do this. I told you it wouldn't work."

"I'm not giving up on my son and you." Shannon sighed.

"So what are you going to order?" She said ignoring the moment they just had.

They made it through an awkward dinner and she dropped him off at his house. She had insisted that she drive , Eddie didn’t know why. Maybe so she made sure that he would show and couldn’t run off. As they pulled up to the house he dreaded what was to come. She insisted on walking him to the door. 

“Well , it wasn’t so bad. I’m sure things will get better the more we do it.” Shannon said as they reached the door. 

“I really doubt it. We should quit while we’re ahead.” Eddie said. 

“I won’t give up on this. I want my family back together. You can’t hold the past against me forever.” 

Shannon started to lean toward him and for a second he was frozen. He worried about rejecting her and what she would do then about Christopher in retaliation. He was grateful that he had left Christopher at Carla’s. Right before her lips touched his the door opened. 

“Mom!” Christopher yelled. 

Eddie looked between the two of them. He watched Carla come up behind Christopher and he was at a loss. She looked so apologetic. He watched as Christopher made his way to Shannon and hugged her. He had no idea how Christopher was so unaffected. 

“I knew I’d see you again. Sooner than you said on Wednesday.” Christopher said as he hugged her. 

Shannon looked up guiltily and Eddie couldn’t say a word , his anger building. He shared a look with Carla. 

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“So how was dinner last night?” Buck asked as they walked into the station. 

“I wanted to leave and come find you. It would have been so much better if you had been with me. She’s been seeing him behind my back , he came out as she walked me to the door and was all excited.” Eddie looked around quickly , finding no one in sight he leaned over and pecked Buck on the lips.

“That bitch. She’s making you do this and she didn’t even respect your wishes.” 

“I don’t know why I’m surprised. She’s always been more concerned with herself.”  

“Damn , I wish this was over already. That Carla had already found everything and you have custody of Christopher. I want to be able to be with you how and when I want and damn anything or anyone else.” Buck sighed. 

“I know and I’m sorry that you have to hide because of me.” Eddie dropped his gaze to the  ground. 

“Hey , I would hide forever if it meant having you.” Buck tilted his head up with his hand. 

“That’s sweet , but I won’t ask you to do that forever. I’ll make sure that she is gone as soon as possible.” 

“I know. Let’s get to work.” 

They walked in the station , talking about little things , things that no one would ever mistake for more than friend talk. As they came up the steps after dropping their stuff in their lockers Buck saw a huge bouquet of flowers on the table. Hen , Chim and Bobby were already gathered around it. 

“Those are some nice flowers , who got lucky or who wants to get lucky?” Buck teased. 

“You. Something you want to tell us Buck?” Chim asked as he handed Buck the card. 

“I don’t know anyone who would send me flowers and I definitely didn’t order any to send out.” Buck looked confused , sliding his eyes to Eddie. 

“What does the card say?” Eddie asked , trying to convey that he had nothing to do with it. 

Buck turned back to the card , it was small with his name written on the outside. He flipped it over and pulled the card out. It was on heavy cream colored paper. At first he didn’t see anything on the paper , but then he turned it over and felt his heart start to race. He was sure the color drained from his face , he felt as though someone turned the sound down on the world. 

_ I told you I would find you. I will take you back and soon. You can’t ever escape me. _

_                                                                                          Love Doug _

“Buck , are you okay?” Eddie asked as he watched the reaction. 

“I…” 

“What is it Buck?” Bobby asked , concerned as he watched easy going Buck look like a ghost. 

“I need to…” he stuttered out but that was all he got out. 

“Throw them away , get them out of here. Now!” Eddie told Chim as he took Buck by the shoulders and led him over to the couch. 

Once he had him sitting he looked to the others. They were at a loss at what to do , they had never seen Buck look so bad. He was always happy and smiling. They didn’t know how to handle this Buck , were afraid to get too close or stay too far away. Eddie looked back at Buck , trying to get him back in the now. He was still clutching the card. 

Eddie pulled it out of his hand , he had a death grip on it. He looked at the writing on the card and felt anger boil through his veins. So this was the ex-husband. The same fucker that had beat the shit out of the man in front of him , had tried to kill his spirit and him more than once. He wanted to use his military training really for the first time in his life. 

“I won’t let that happen. I won’t let him near you.” Eddie whispered as he gripped Buck’s hands. 

Buck looked up at him , moving slowly as though he was in thick gel. He stared at Eddie , seeing the determination on his face and the fire in his eyes as he processed his words. He was sure that he was in shock , it seemed likely. He was distantly ashamed at the fact that he was having this episode in front of everyone. He worried how they would look at him after this. 

“He’ll never give up.”

“I don’t care , I won’t either. I’m in this for the long haul.” Eddie whispered. 

The others slowly walked over , seeing that Buck seemed to be doing better. They stayed back once they made it there , not wanting to crowd him. They were confused and curious , but they wouldn’t push. Buck looked up at them slowly and the look on his face was heartbreaking , no one should look that sad. 

“I guess you want to know what that was all about.” Buck said as he looked at them , his heart settling to normal and the world fading back into focus. 

“We don’t need to know anything other than if you’re alright.” Bobby told him quietly. 

“I think that’s kind of sweet Bobby , but time has passed for that. If things are going the way they seem to be you need to know why.” 

“Is it that bad Buck?” Hen asked. 

“It’s pretty bad. But really I’m more worried about how you guys are going to take it.” Buck let out a nervous laugh , wiping his hands on his pant legs. 

“You think so little of us?” Chim asked looking hurt.

“It’s more that I think so little of me. I’ve spent a lot of time being told how little I mean that it kind of stuck.” 

“Buck..” Bobby had the sad dad eyes going. 

“No , I’m learning slowly that I’m not that person , that I am worth something. Sometimes things set me back , but I’m moving forward.” 

“Oh god , the way we talk about you and pick on you! Buck…” Hen covered her mouth in horror.

“It’s not the same. I promise and you are different then...well it’s different.” 

“No , it’s not. We should know better , I should know better than anyone the things that someone can keep hidden inside.” Bobby told him. 

“I want to tell you guys what happened , what this card means is coming. But I can’t do that if you’re going to blame yourselves for things that you had no idea about.” 

“I think we can suspend the guilt if you want to tell us.” Bobby looked at everyone , they nodded in agreement. Except Eddie. 

“I already know.” Eddie told them taking a seat next to Buck and putting an arm around him. 

“Alright. Before I came here I lived in Pennsylvania. After high school I got married , like right after. Things were alright when we were dating and for a little while after the wedding. But things changed. Suddenly there was this anger that came from out of nowhere , first it was smacks and slaps. Then later it became fists and longer , harder beatings. It took me a while to realize that it needed to end , I needed to get away , but by then things were bleak. I had no higher education , hadn’t had a job since the wedding and I had no money to myself.” 

“What about your family , Maddie at least?” Chim interrupted. 

“By that time I hadn’t seen them since either the wedding or before. Things were strained with my parents and Maddie was living the college life. I was cut off from them the longer and worse the beatings got. When I decided that enough was enough, I had to save change , the only money that wasn't policed. It took me three years to get enough for a ticket out of there and here.”

“Do you need a break?” 

“No , I need to get it all out. I was there for five years , five years of being beaten and told how worthless I was. I had an eating disorder for most of that time , I was told that working out meant I was cheating , but then told how fat and disgusting I was becoming if I didn’t work out. I learned to throw it all up , forcing my body to eat itself. When I got away and came here I lived in homeless shelters and one day I found a flyer for a technical school. I got financial aid and took the course pamphlet and laid it out. Closed my eyes and picked one , here I am.” 

They all sat there in silence , processing everything he had said. It was a lot to take in and correct in their view of him. He was stronger than anyone they had known and this whole time they had had no idea. They had looked no further than the surface and seen the shallow facade he wore. They felt ashamed of themselves. 

“What happened to your wife?” Bobby asked. 

“Well that’s the thing , the main reason I’m worried about telling you. I don’t have a wife.” 

“But you said you were married…” Chim looked confused. 

“I am , just not to a...woman.” 

“You...I....did not see that coming. I need my gaydar fixed.” Hen stuttered out. 

“But the women…” 

“Chim , when I got here you all started in on how the ladies would love me and blah blah blah. I spent five years so strictly controlled that I went a little wild with the freedom , I was so traumatized by it all that I rejected who I was. I wanted to be someone new , so I went along with the playboy image.” 

“What about Abby?” Hen looked at him , no judgement in her eyes. 

“She knew , we had tried but things weren’t working and she kind of had this idea. She agreed to be my cover , when her mother died, I moved in to keep an eye on her place.”

“So this husband , what’s going on now?” 

“Well , first he called me , but it was my cell so no way he knew where I lived. I’m guessing one of the news reports lead him to the station , it’s how Maddie found me. The card is his way of warning me that he’s coming for me.” 

“We won’t let that happen. Athena can make sure he spends the rest of his life in jail if he touches you.” Bobby smiled at the thought of his woman.

“Wait a minute , Taylor Kelly , the night at the bar in the bathroom?” Chim said.

“That wasn’t consensual. She was blackmailing me. I’m the reason she got arrested.” 

“You went to Athena?” Bobby questioned.

“I had no choice , she was going to expose my past and I didn’t want her to be what led Doug to me , but I have no choice now. He knows I work here.” 

“He’s not getting close to you.” Eddie spat. Hen looked between them. 

“You going to be ok to work?” Bobby asked.

“I’m good boss. Besides it’s Christmas.” 

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The rest of the shift was crazy. There was a guy who fell off his roof trying to outdo his neighbor with the decorations. Luckily he fell on an inflated lawn ornament. Christmas made people crazy. 

Some package worker got wrapped in the box he was working on , loaded in an airplane and nearly froze to death. Maddie had taken the call. She had the brilliant idea to keep calling the cell so they could find the right box. Buck promised to call her later and tell her about the card from Doug. 

The others treated him the same as before , better actually since they stopped teasing him. He was happy with how things had turned out. Sure he wasn’t all the way happy , he still had to hide his relationship with Eddie , but he was halfway out. That was all that mattered. 

“So what do you think he’ll do , your husband?” Bobby asked as they had dinner. 

“I never could tell what he was going to do.” 

“I can’t believe the life you’ve lived and still have the ability to smile.” Hen said in amazement. 

“I was controlled for so long. I just want to be me.” 

“So how come Eddie knows?” Chim asked. 

“Well....” Eddie stuttered , lost on how to answer. 

“It was when the old lady drugged us. Me and Eddie were sitting there at my place and I had been frightened , the drugs had caused me to see Doug and relive some of the bad moments. He had seen that. There was no hiding at that point.” 

“So what are your plans for Christmas?” Hen asked.

“It’ll probably be just me and Maddie. I used to love Christmas before...well , it's been a while." Buck said.

“Hey , that reminds me. I’m taking Christopher to see Santa tonight and I need a little help.” 

“Sure , what do you need?” Buck asked him.

“Well , I don’t want him to become overwhelmed. Sometimes he feels like he’s taking too long when he walks. That and he won’t tell me what he wants for Christmas.” 

“So you think he’ll tell me?” 

“I think you can find out. You’re more sneakier than I am.” Eddie smiled. 

“I can try.” Buck returned the smile , neither of them seeing the look Hen was giving them. 

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They walked up to the area by the fountain in the park where Santa was set up. Buck had scoured the internet after Eddie had told him , to find the perfect Santa. There were places that set up and advertised as special needs. They catered to the autistic kids and the ones that couldn’t handle the mall and all that madness. 

“So what are you going to ask Santa for little man?” Buck asked as Eddie went to get them all hot chocolate. 

“I know what you’re doing. Dad asked you to find out didn’t he?” 

“You think I would sell you out to your dad?” Buck asked with mock hurt , his hands over his heart. 

“Maybe. You would do a lot of things for my dad.”

“Yeah , but I wouldn’t betray your trust like that either.” Christopher looked at him for a minute , sizing him up.

“Ok , I want to tell Santa to bring me a new computer game.” 

“I know that can’t be it or you would have told your dad. You guys are so close.” 

“Well , there is one other thing , but I don’t want to get his hopes up if Santa can’t do it.” 

“Oh that sounds like it’s something good.” 

“It is. I want Santa to make us a family again.” Christopher whispered before pretending to ignore him as Eddie came back. Buck felt his heart break a little , sure they hadn’t said anything to Christopher so he couldn’t know that Buck wanted to be part of the family.

“So you ready to get in line?” Eddie asked. 

“I want to go by myself.” Christopher told him. 

“I think that will be ok.” Eddie said as the elf came to greet them. 

Eddie walked over and sat on the low wall around the fountain. Buck let the words float through his head. He hurt at the thought of disappointing Christopher , that instead of getting his family again he would get him. Christopher wouldn’t have any love for the man who was keeping his family apart. 

“Hey , you ok?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah , I was just thinking about things.” 

“So did he give you any hint about what he wants?” Eddie looked at him hopefully. 

“Oh well , I have been sworn to secrecy , but I can tell you that something of the video game variety would go over well.” Buck said trying to keep his mood upbeat.

“Why would he be hiding that from me?” Eddie looked so confused. 

“Maybe it’s a test to see if Santa is real and not you.” Buck suggested. 

“Maybe.” 

They watched as Christopher took his turn , Buck fighting back the tears when he thought of him telling Santa how he wanted his family back. He should have known that things weren’t going to last. He would never get the happy ending. Once Christopher came clean about what he wanted Eddie would make sure it happened. He loved his son so much , so much that he would get back together with his mother to make him happy. Eddie stood to meet Christopher as he walked toward them , done telling Santa his wishes. 

Buck stood and walked over to them. He was cherishing this moment. As he would all the ones he has left. He just had to keep it together and not start blubbering like a teen girl meeting Robert Pattinson for the first time. 

“Did you tell him what you wanted?” Eddie asked. 

“Yeah , he said he’d see what he could do.” 

Buck watched with his hands in his pockets as they walked past him , Eddie curious to hear about his first solo Santa trip. Christopher was still refusing to name what he asked for and Buck would keep the secret even if it meant his heartache. 

“You two have an adorable son.” the elf who brought Christopher back said bringing him out of his thoughts. 

“What?” Buck asked , sure that he hadn’t heard her right.

“I said you two have an adorable son.” she smiled at him. 

He stood there for a moment and considered correcting her. Not that he wasn’t happy that times had changed enough that this assumption wasn't accompanied by hatred toward them. Honestly the time it would take to explain wasn’t worth it. Besides he liked pretending for a little while. 

“Thank you.” he nodded and went to join Eddie and Christopher. 

“So we were just talking about how we need to get decorated for Santa to come to the house. Do you want to join us at the tree lot to find the perfect tree?” Eddie asked as he joined them.

“I promised I’d help Chim and Maddie decorate her apartment. She’s like that creepy Who in The Grinch Who Stole Christmas that has all the perfect Christmas decorations and the whole feast. She convinced Chim to help her and he begged me for help once he realized what she was like.” 

“Oh well that’s ok. Maybe you can help us decorate it later since you have such experience in matters like that.” Eddie laughed. 

“Yeah , If the Christmas Nazi let’s me go anytime soon.” Buck said. 

“See you later then?” Eddie looked at him like he wanted to drag him home with them. 

“Yeah , I’ll let you know when I’ve escaped.” Buck said wishing he could kiss him goodbye. He could see the understanding in Eddie’s eyes.

“Bye Buck.” Christopher said and Buck headed for his jeep to get to Maddie’s before she went crazy and it turned into something out of Black Christmas instead.

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They were walking around the third tree lot , looking for the perfect tree. Christopher had been quick to point out the flaws of every tree so far. He was sitting on a bench right now while Eddie brought trees to him to be judged. He was losing faith that the perfect tree existed. 

“Can I help you find something?” a guy that was about his height with dark hair and warm brown eyes said as he walked up to him. 

“I’m on the hunt for the perfect tree. My son and I never really had one and this year we have a lot of reasons to celebrate and we want it to be perfect.”

“Well , hopefully I can help.” 

“Thank you so much.” Eddie sighed in relief. 

“So who are you making it special and perfect for exactly?”

“I…well , I’m kind of seeing someone new and he’s had things rough the past few years and I want to make it special for him. My son demanded that we do it for him even though he doesn’t know about him and I or his past troubles.” 

“That sounds sweet. I had a guy once upon a time that was worth all that. But he’s gone now , you gotta cherish the moments when they happen.” the guy said sadly. 

“Wow , I didn’t even realize I let the he slip. Glad it was to someone like minded. I always worry about that stuff.” 

“I know what you mean. Now how about this one?” he asked pointing to the most beautiful tree Eddie had ever seen.

It was full and tall and as though it was from a Christmas card or something. This was the tree , he was sure of it. He called Christopher over as he stared in wonder at this perfect tree. He envisioned decorating it with Christopher and Buck , opening presents with them and the thought of lights twinkling off Buck’s naked skin made him shake his head before there was a situation. 

“It’s perfect dad!” Christopher yelled as he looked over the tree. 

“Buck will love it!” Eddie said without thinking. 

“Yeah he will dad.” Christopher said without blinking and Eddie had to wonder what all he had picked up on. 

“Glad I could help you folks. Just take it up front and they’ll wrap it and load it for you. Enjoy your Christmas.” he said and walked off. 

Eddie grabbed the tree and totted it toward the front , Christopher talking excitedly the whole time. The guy that helped them had melted into the shadows of the other trees , watching father and son leave with the tree he had picked out. 

He knew it was the right tree as soon as he saw it. He had always had an eye for perfection. He had followed the father and son as they left the park and made their way through each tree lot. He had been walking on the other side of the fountain when he had seen them. This man sitting there so close to his husband. 

He had a plan , now that he knew this man was a part of Evan’s life. Buck , he had called him Buck. A new life , a new name , a new career and now a new man. He’d see about that. Buck would learn not to run from him , this man would learn to stay away from other’s property too. 

Doug would make sure of that. 


	10. Merry Exmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have arrived people. This is the Doug shows up at Buck's chapter. Hold on to your stomach cause it will drop. Can't wait for the new season look for my Buddie group on facebook. ENJOY

“Buck…” Eddie groaned as he ran his hands up his sides. 

Buck was in his lap , they were at his place on the couch. Christopher was still with Carla , she had laughed at him when he asked this morning if she could keep him for an extra hour. It probably was because he was blushing , he could feel his face heat as he asked. 

“Yes…” Buck whispered as he rolled his hips down against Eddie’s 

He had been nearly vibrating with joy when Eddie had quietly told him this morning that Carla was watching Christopher longer today so he could come over after shift. They hadn’t had much time alone and they were ready to move beyond kisses. 

“Buck , babe , we have 10 mins before Carla gets here.” Eddie pulled away from Buck’s lips. 

“That went by so damn fast , too fast. We need a whole night together. Then we can spend the whole day with Christopher.” Buck pecked Eddie on the nose and climbed off his lap.

“I know , I’m sorry we have to go so slow.” 

“Hey , I don’t care how slow we have to go as long as I’m with you I’m happy.” Buck smiled at him. 

“You are so much more than I should have.” 

“No , you deserve everything. Now I’m going to go fix this situation before they get here.” Buck said and headed toward the bathroom. 

Eddie laughed at him , but took the time to fix his own issue. By the time Buck came out of the bathroom Carla was there with Christopher , who was busy telling Eddie all about his day. Carla gave him that knowing smirk that told Buck she knew exactly what they had been doing before she got there. 

“How you doing Buckaroo?” she asked. 

“I’m fine darling , you?” 

“I’m good. Figured that you would be hurting.” she winked at him. 

“I’ll live.” 

“Anytime you need more time to fix that ache , let me know.” she smiled at him.

“Thanks , Carla. I gotta get going. It was good to see you Christopher.” Buck smiled at him. 

“I’ll walk you out.” Eddie said and stood to see him to the door. 

Once out of the room and by the front door Eddie looked behind them quickly and grabbed Buck's shoulder spinning him around and pressing him against the door. Buck smiled , laughter in his eyes as he let Eddie claim his mouth again.

"Now I have a problem again." Buck said as he leaned against the door his hands playing with the nape of Eddie's neck. 

"At least the ride home to calm down. I gotta deal with it before my son sees." Eddie groaned. 

"You did it."

"I know , still. I'll see you for shift tomorrow?"

"It's a date." 

"I wish."

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"So , worst Christmas call?" Chim asked the table while they were eating.

"There was a pile up on the 405 , my third year. Blood and glass everywhere." Athena offered as she sat next to Bobby.

"This is my first Christmas , but seen a lot of bad shit during my tours. Mainly kids." Eddie said.

"Why is this a topic?" Hen asked.

"I'm curious." Chim replied.

"I had a Christmas fire at an apartment complex." Hen said.

"What about you Buck?" Chim asked.

"Not really. I haven't had a bad Christmas call." 

"You had something else?" Hen looked at him.

"My husband bought me a dog , Copper. He took him off after he chewed his stuff again. Said he took care of him. I think he killed him."

"That's terrible." Hen whispered.

"Yeah , I think we need different conversation topics." Bobby said. 

The bell went off and that was the end of the conversation.

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Eddie thought about the story Buck had told them at the station for a long time. He found it hard to believe that someone as sweet as Buck had lived through shit like that. Even more unbelievable was the fact that he had remained as sweet as he was 

"So what was this Copper like?" Eddie asked as they worked out in the gym at the station. 

"He was a sweet pup. He had these bat like ears and the orangest eyes I've ever seen. He was tan and white." 

"He sounds sweet." 

"He was , he was also a puppy and Doug didn't try to keep his stuff up. But he blamed the dog instead of taking responsibility."

"You really think he killed him?"

"I think he was enough of an ass that he did." Buck dropped the weights he was lifting and grabbed a towel. 

Eddie moved over to the stairmaster as he thought over what Buck had told him. He knew shit had been bad , but he wondered if he had really killed the dog. He wanted to look into it when he had a chance. 

"So I have to do Christmas with Christopher , my family and Shannon , but I was thinking I can sneak away to spend some time with you." 

"As long as you bring Christopher too."

"I can do that. What are your plans?" Eddie smiled.

"I'm going to be with Maddie and Chim. He kind of kicked me out the other day so I'm crashing with Maddie."

"Why didn't you tell me?" 

"I didn't want you to feel...I don't know bad or something. I'll be fine."

"I'd offer for you to come stay with us , but I know you'd refuse and Shannon would probably use it. Even if she doesn't know you'd be sleeping in my room." 

"What are you guys talking about?" Chim asked as he walked into the gym. 

"Uh…" Eddie looked at Buck at a loss.

"If I bunked with Eddie he thinks I'd steal his room instead of the couch." Buck lied smoothly , he had some practice after all. 

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Eddie kept thinking about how Buck had talked about the poor pup , that he had loved and lost. The longer he thought about it the more he thought that it was possible that the pup might not be dead. He wondered how hard it would be to track down. 

He had a guy that he had served on his second tour with , he had come back from active duty and become a cop on the east coast. Michael Anderson owed him a favor and Eddie planned to collect. 

“Hello?” the voice on the other end answered. 

“Michael , it’s Eddie.” 

“Eddie Diaz? Holy shit man , how have you been?” 

“I’m doing alright. How are things going with you?” 

“I’m doing pretty good. Been on the force for a while now , settled in and all. They have me working on the k-9 program now. Got me my very own pup now.” 

“That’s great. I’m out in L.A. a firefighter for LAFD. Got back in country and wanted something in the helping people career path.”

“How’s your kid?” 

“He’s great , got him in a really good school over here. Got a really great helper , Carla , Buck sent her to me and she’s been helpful.” 

“Heard anymore from your wife?”

“Oh , yeah that has been real fun. She came here after I let her know I needed help getting Christopher in this school. She demanded that I date her and stuff in exchange for her help.”

“What the hell , man? She’s his mother , she’s supposed to do all she can for him without extorting you.”

Eddie sighed as he relaxed back into the couch. He was glad that he had made this call even if Michael couldn’t help him find the dog. He had missed the friends he had made on tour , the brotherhood he had established. 

“I know , but Carla is helping me get things in order to gain full custody of Christopher.” 

“That’s great , you deserve it man. The way you went to bat for him and the shit she pulled , he should be with you.” 

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.” 

“Your welcome , man. So what has you calling , not that I’m not glad , but there’s three hours difference and I doubt you called just to catch up.” 

“Yeah . I kind of have a favor to ask. I have a friend that was in a violent marriage back east. He ran and got away , but a few years ago they had a dog and he thinks his husband killed it. I’m not so sure and was wondering if you could look into it and see if he dumped the dog instead.”

“Friend huh? Give me the name of the guy and what the dog looked like and I’ll see what I can do.” 

“Your a pal. Ok so his name is Evan Buckley , he married Doug Kendall. The dog was a pit bull type , white and tan coloring with distinctive bat-like ears. This was about four years ago I believe.” 

“Let me see what I can find. Might take me a few days though. I’ll call if I find anything.” 

“Thank you , man.” 

“This friend must be pretty important for you to be looking for a dog.” 

“Yeah , he’s something alright.” Eddie said and once they mumbled goodbyes he hung up. 

He had to get ready for another day. He hoped Michael could find the dog , he wanted to give Buck something really special for Christmas. Until then he had time to spend with Christopher and to navigate this weird relationship with Shannon. 

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Two days later and he had completed his Christmas shopping for the station , his family members and Christopher. He had taken Buck’s suggestion and gotten him a few different video games. Mostly they were both fun and educational. 

They had down time since they would be working a lot of hours for Christmas itself. He had his family and Carla scheduled to cover the hours he was on shift for the holiday. Everyone was either doing Christmas before or after shift. That way everyone had time to spend it with their family. He was set to spend time with Buck after shift so he had as much time to find the dog as possible , though he had a back up gift in case. 

He had scoured the stores and online looking for the perfect gift. It was harder than he thought since he had no idea what to get the man he was falling in love with. All the things he thought of were either shallow or way too deep. He didn’t want to send the wrong message. Finally he settled on a simple necklace , one that he could find the perfect charm for with Buck. 

Now though he had a date night to get to.

“Ugh what the hell movie should I get?” 

“Looking for a movie?” a voice said from behind him. He turned to find the guy that had helped them pick out the tree at the lot. 

“Hey , yeah I have a date , but I’m not sure what kind of movie to pick. Love , Actually or Die Hard.” Eddie held up his two choices. 

“Depends on the date I guess.” 

“He’s the one I was getting the tree for , we are going to decorate it later and watch movies. He loves Christmas , not as much as his sister , but he had some bad Christmases.” 

“That sucks. Well , I’d say that both might go over well. If he’s a romantic then Love , Actually will be perfect and if he’s not Die Hard gives you action.” 

“That’s actually pretty smart. Thanks...I don’t know your name , I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine , I never introduced myself before. I’m Jason Bailey.” he stuck his hand out to shake it. 

“I think I’ll take both of these.” Eddie said and makes his way to the checkout. 

“That’ll be twenty.” the cashier said as she rang up the movies. 

Eddie dug in his pocket , then he dug in all the other pockets. He knew he had his wallet , he grabbed it on the way out the door. He was stopping here , Buck was getting food and then they were meeting at Maddie’s. 

Chim had gotten tired of Buck working out and being messy to his clean self and told him he had to go. Maddie had been waiting at her new apartment with an air mattress. Buck had complained about her not letting him sleep on the couch at least , apparently she was still mad about the pizza on the couch. Chim had been teasing him about it at the station.  

“I can’t seem to find my wallet.” he said embarrassed.

“I got it man.” Jason said from behind him. 

“You don’t have to do that.” Eddie protested. 

“It’s alright , can’t let this ruin your date night.” Jason smiled at him. 

“Thanks , you give me your address and I can get it back to you.” Eddie said , a little unnerved about something in his smile. 

“Don’t worry about it really.” 

“Ok , thank you again.” Eddie said grabbing the movies and heading out. 

He made it to Maddie’s apartment with no other problems. He tried to figure out what happened to his wallet the whole way there. He resolved to searching his car in the morning. He would hate to have to replace everything. 

“Hey.” Buck said as he parked behind him. 

“Hey , so Maddie went to spend the night at Chimney’s. I think she thinks tonight is going differently.” Buck blushed. 

“I don’t mind that she thinks that. This is me and you , not other people. I care what you think.” Eddie told him as they walked in the apartment to put the food and movies down before going back to unload the tree. 

“I bet Christopher is sad he’s missing out on decorating this beautiful tree.” Buck said as they opened it in the living room. 

“He said we have to save the Angel on top for him.” Eddie smiled. 

“I think we can do that. So eat , watch some tv and then decorate.” Buck suggested as they set out the food. 

“It’s a plan.” 

“I love these movies!” Buck said as he took them out of the bag.

“Which one first?” Eddie asked as they carried their food into the living room. 

“Love , Actually. I love me some Andrew Lincoln and that damn Alan Rickman. But I like him sweet then sour.” Buck laughed as they sat close to each other on the couch. Eddie put the movie in and they ate. 

“I am stuffed. Maybe we should have done the work then the relaxing.” Buck pouted. 

“I think we can take a little break before we get started. My aunt is keeping Christopher overnight.” 

“You mean to tell me we have the entire night to ourselves , alone?” Buck looked at him. 

“Yeah.” Eddie looked at Buck. 

They sat there , neither saying a word. They hadn’t arranged for the night to go like this. Buck hadn’t known Maddie was going to assume and stay with Chim. Though he really should have realized she’d take any excuse to spend more time with the man. Eddie had only let Christopher stay cause he had begged to stay with her. Maybe he had his own thoughts on his relationship with Buck.

“Fuck.” Buck said and lunged at Eddie. 

His hands went to his face , holding him as he attacked his mouth. It had been a few days since they had time together. Hiding their relationship was getting harder , he never wanted to leave and he wanted to kiss him whenever the feeling struck. Eddie placed his hands on Buck’s hips to steady him as he sunk into his lap. 

Buck was trying to resist the urge to rut against him until he came in his pants like a teenager. Eddie flicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and he groaned. Buck pulled back and panted as he stared at Eddie. His lips were red and wet , his eyes wild with the pupils blown. Buck reached down to grab the hem of his shirt and whipped it over his head , dropping it behind him. 

“Buck…” Eddie whispered , he took in the skin exposed. He had caught glimpses in the locker room before , but now he had time to look. He ran his hands up his sides. 

“What?” Buck asked , feeling embarrassed.

“You are so damn sexy.” Eddie told him as he reached his hands up to cradle Buck’s head and pulled him back to his mouth , kissing the smile off his lips.  

They continued to kiss , Eddie running his hands over all the skin he could reach. He felt a few ridges along his back and paused. Buck tensed a little and slowly pulled back. Eddie looked at him , waiting for Buck to speak. 

“That...that is from Doug. It’s not as bad as you think.” 

“Can I see?” Eddie asked. Buck nodded and stood , turning so Eddie could see. 

Eddie scooted to edge of the couch to get a better look. It was lighter than he thought. The scars weren’t as thick as they felt. He reached up and traced the three long scars. They were lighter than the rest of the skin on Buck’s back. His tan made them pale in comparison. 

“He took a belt to me one night. I had let his steak get well done , he hated that. One strike for each stage past rare.” 

“I ever meet him , I should kill the fucker.”: Eddie growled. 

“I know it’s not pretty , it’s ugly really. I’m sorry.” 

“Never say that. You have nothing to apologize for.” Eddie leaned forward when he saw how Buck had hunched in on himself. 

He held Buck’s sides as he leaned forward and brought his lips to the scars. He kissed them gently , not sure how sensitive they were. When Buck didn’t pull away Eddie started to run his tongue up the ropey scarring. Placing kisses here and there. 

“Eddie..” Buck groaned , Eddie watched as his right hand disappeared in front of him. It became obvious that he was rubbing himself through his jeans. 

Eddie stood and turned Buck slowly around to face him. He was hard in his pants , the bulge twitched as he looked at it. He put one hand on his waist and the other wrapped around the nape of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. 

Buck tugged at his shirt as Eddie devoured his mouth. He pulled back so Buck could pull it off. Buck grasped at his back as they kissed again. Eddie nipped at his lip , pulling it a little before pulling back. 

Buck panted , watching to see what Eddie was going to do. He was more aroused than he had been in forever. Eddie smiled and slowly sunk to his knees. Buck watched with wide eyes as Eddie ran his hands along the waistband of the jeans. 

“Is this ok?” Eddie asked. 

“Hell , yes.” Buck fought the urge to buck his hips.

Eddie popped the button on the jeans and slowly pulled them and the black boxers down the strong thighs of Buck’s legs. He pulled them down as far as his knees and ran his hands back up. Buck’s breathing was erratic as he held himself still as he could. Eddie took Buck in hand and he couldn’t resist the urge to buck into his fist. 

“Eddie , god…” 

“I know. I feel like I could shoot off right now.” 

He leaned in and closed his lips around the spongy head of Buck’s cock. Buck wasn’t sure his legs would hold him. Eddie groaned as he bucked a little into the heat of his mouth and then Eddie set a brutal pace. Swallowing him down as far as he could , moaning at the taste of precum spurting on his tongue. 

“Shit , Eddie I’m gonna cum.” Buck panted , thighs shaking as he felt the start of his orgasm. He would feel embarrassed after he could think again. 

Eddie only groaned louder , humming against the cock head in his throat. He was leaking , he could feel it soaking his boxers. Buck tensed against him and Eddie felt the head of his cock swell before cum exploded in his mouth. 

“Eddie , fuck!” Buck shouted as he came in his mouth. 

Once Eddie finished swallowing everything in his mouth he pulled back to look at Buck. He was shaking and looking at Eddie in awe. Eddie squeezed his thighs together , relieving the ache of his still hard cock. 

“Let me.” Buck said as he fell to his knees in front of the couch, urging Eddie up on the couch with his hands.. 

He made quick work of Eddie’s pants and took him in hand. Giving head had always made his jaw hurt , but he spit in his hand and lubed Eddie’s cock as he stroked him. Eddie’s head snapped back against the back of the couch , moaning. 

“That’s it , let go. Cum for me Eddie.” Buck whispered. 

“You’re gonna kill me babe.” Eddie said fucking up into his fist. 

“I wanna see you cum , paint my face with it.” 

“Shit , I’m gonna cum.” Eddie said , his legs locking as he watched Buck speed up. He thrust up as far as his hips allowed him too and the cum shot out hitting Buck in the face. 

“Fuck.” Eddie looked at the cum streaked across Buck’s face , it painted his birthmark and those red , plump lips. 

Eddie lunged forward and kissed Buck , tasting the cum on his lips. Buck moaned into the kiss , chasing the taste of Eddie. Eddie pulled away to lick the other stripes of cum off his face and share them in a kiss with Buck. His cock twitched as they kissed and wished he was eighteen again and ready to go quickly. 

“That was hot as fuck.” Buck said as they finished. 

“I can’t wait to be with you all the time.” 

“Me either. We better clean up though before Maddie kills me.” Buck laughed. 

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Eddie was on cloud nine the rest of the time. He and Buck had finished decorating the tree , leaving the Angel for Christopher. When he got home the next day Michael had left him a voicemail. He checked the time and called him back as soon as possible. 

“Hey , man thanks for calling me back.” Michael answered. 

“Of course , what do you have for me?” 

“I found the guy and the dog. You were right , he dumped the dog. I managed to track the dog to Santa Monica. Seems like he’s there now.” 

“That’s insane. I can’t believe he’s so damn close.” 

“It is pretty cool. So you gonna get this dog for your friend?” 

“Yeah , man what do I owe you? Anything you just name the price.” 

“Just send me a pic or a video of this joyous reunion.”

“It’s a deal.”

Eddie had so much to smile about he was afraid his heart was going to explode. They had been invited to Athena’s house to celebrate with her family and Bobby. 

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“I can’t believe Bobby proposed to Athena.” Buck said. They had watched in awe as he dropped down on one knee in the station and asked her. 

“I can’t believe she said yes.” Eddie said as they sat in the gym , everyone else was off doing other stuff.  

“I was thinking. The other night had me thinking about things.” Buck said. 

“Oh yeah , what about it?” 

“I want to have that with you. To be able to spend the night together and wake up with you. I know right now things can’t be like that , but maybe after.” 

“So what do you mean exactly?” Eddie asked.

“I want to tell the station , after Shannon’s deal is done and I was thinking about trying living together. What do you think?” Buck looked at him. 

“Getting to wake up to you everyday and sleep next to every night? That’s heaven to me. You , me and Christopher is all I need.” Eddie looked around and seeing the others milling about took Buck’s hand and squeezed real quick. 

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“I want another date.” Shannon said as soon as Eddie opened the door. 

“Why Shannon? This won’t work , why are you still pushing it?” Eddie was glad Christopher was still at school. 

“I want just one more , right before Christmas. Then maybe I can come over to spend Christmas with Christopher.” 

“Fine , but this is the last one.” Eddie hated this. 

“Can we do it at my place?” Shannon asked. 

“I guess , at least then there’s no one to stare at us if we get loud.” Eddie conceded. 

“See you tomorrow then.” 

Eddie wanted the date over already , but he was content to wait if it meant the last one. He went to pick up Christopher. 

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“I’m sorry that I tried to force this on you. I just want my family together.” Shannon said as she brought him a glass of wine. 

“It’s fine. I’m just glad you realize that this won’t happen.” 

“I bet. So I can see Christpher after this?” she asked. 

“I think he’s ok with you being in his life now. But if you run off again that’s it , no more chances.” Eddie said drinking the rest of the wine. 

“I promise I won’t run off again.” Shannon said. 

Eddie felt that he could believe her. He looked at her and felt the world go a little fuzzy. He had been working too hard. They had just finished the Christmas shift earlier in the day and he had Buck’s Christmas tomorrow night. He hadn’t been able to bring Copper home yet , but he was his. He was going to give Buck the adoption paperwork for his present then they’d get him together the next day. 

“I feel kind of weird. Think I’m too tired from shift.” Eddie said as his vision started to get worse. 

“Lay down for a minute , rest and then you can go home.” Shannon told him and even though it sounded reasonable Eddie felt like there was something off about it all. 

The next thing Eddie remembered he was waking up in his bed , he had to have been out of it last night. He got up and got ready , he had a gift to deliver. 

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Eddie got all the stuff done he needed to but there was no way he was gonna have time to drop off Buck’s gift before they all went to Athena’s to celebrate with them. He had decided to slip his gift under the tree so when they came to open presents at Maddie’s in the morning he could be surprised and they could get Copper then.

“Hey , Chim can you do me a favor?” 

“I think so. What is it?” 

“I need you to drop off a present at Maddie and Buck’s.”

“Right now?” 

“Yeah , I’m running late and can’t get over there before we go to Athena’s.” 

“I can get it there. I’ll be there in a few.” Chim said.

“Thank you so much.” Eddie sighed in relief. Now if only he could shake the odd feeling he had from the loss of memory last night. 

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He was sure that he would be able to get Evan with little to no problems. He was waiting in the shadows of the building to make sure that no one was out to spot him. He couldn’t kidnap his husband if there were witnesses. 

He had arrived twenty minutes ago. He saw a woman leave walking a dog and an old man come in with groceries. There was an Asian man pulling up to the curb. He looked around and decided maybe he needed someone to walk in with. There was some security on the building he was sure. 

He walked out of the shadows behind the man and was glad he had decided to follow someone. There was a gate with a key code to get in. He pulled out his phone and pretended to scroll through it , paying the guy no mind as he held the gate open for him. 

“Thanks man.” he said and continued walking. 

The Asian man passed by him as he kept a slow pace and he felt his good luck turn as he watched him walk toward the door he had seen Evan go into when he watched him from before. The guy , Eddie had led him here after the movie store. Swearing to himself he wrapped his hand around the knife in his pocket and walked up behind the man. As he reached him the door swung open to reveal Evan , who looked at him in shock. He thrust the knife up through the back of the Asian quickly , a gasp escaping him. 

“Hi , honey I’m home.” Doug said as he wrenched the knife out of Chim’s back and let him fall to the ground. 


	11. Hunted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this tense new chapter and know that when I wrote the line "snapped back to reality" I had to restrain myself from following that with "there goes the gravity" Damn that Eminem. Lol.

Buck felt his heart stop when he opened the door. Chim was standing there , but behind him was the man he had left behind a year ago. The man he never wanted to see again. His breathing was shallow , his chest tight. He watched as Doug shoved a knife into Chim’s back and he fell limp to the floor with nothing more than a gasp. 

“Hi , honey I’m home.” Doug said and Buck unfroze. 

He tried to shut the door , pushing against it with all his might. It banged into Chim’s body , Buck spared a fleeting thought for his friend. Doug used the moment to grab at Buck’s arm. He tried to wrench his body away , but he was too slow. 

“You’re not going anywhere , babe.” Doug said as he finally got ahold of Buck.

“NO! Let me go!” Buck yelled , panic rising in his chest. 

“I let you have a year , that’s long enough. Now you come home with me.” 

“No , HELP!” Buck cried desperately , hoping that one of the neighbors would hear him. 

“Shut up or I kill anyone else that comes here. You want more bodies on your conscience?” Doug snapped and held the knife to his throat. 

Buck stared at him , trying to control his breathing. He was fighting to breathe , but also his instincts to cower in fear of the man who had taught him what fear was. He wanted to curl up and wait for Doug to disappear. Then again the new side of him , the one that was being brought out with Eddie wanted to beat the shit out of him instead. 

“Good , now come with me.” Doug yanked on him until he started walking toward the door. 

“Wait , let me at least call 911 for him.” Buck pleaded as they neared Chim bleeding outside the door. 

“Make it quick. And say anything other than to get him help and I’ll slit his throat right in front of you.” 

_“911 What’s your emergency?” a woman’s voice answered the call._

“I need to report a stabbing victim at 222 Beaumont Court apartment 343.” Buck told her. 

_“Is the person who stabbed him still in the vicinity?”_

Doug pushed the knife against his skin as a reminder so Buck swallowed and hung up the phone. He went to put it in his pocket , but Doug shook his head. He put the phone down by Chim , hoping that help would get there as soon as possible. He regretted that he wouldn’t be there at the party , Eddie was going to be so upset. 

Doug walked him as quickly as he dared to the car he had. He put Buck in the passenger’s seat , zip tying his hands before going around and getting in the driver’s seat. Buck swallowed against the lump in his throat and tried to keep the tears at bay. He was going back to hell. 

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“Thanks for coming guys. Come in and put the stuff down on the dining room table.” Bobby said as he opened the door for Eddie and Christopher. 

“Thanks for having us.” Eddie said as they made their way into the house.

Eddie looked around as they came in , seemed like everyone was there. He saw Hen and her wife over by the backdoor. Maddie was talking to Athena while they put food on the table. Athena’s kids were in the living room with Michael. Eddie looked around for Buck and Chim. He was sure they should be here already. 

“Hey , where’s Buck and Chim?” he asked as they joined the others. 

“They haven’t made it yet. Why?” Maddie asked. 

“I sent Chim over to drop off a gift. I figured they’d be here already.” Eddie said. 

“I think we can give them some more time. Buck always was late.” Maddie told them with a smile. 

Eddie didn’t like whatever was going on. He had a bad feeling , but he seemed to be the only one. He nodded anyway. He stood and listened to the others talk while he watched the clock. Fifteen minutes later he was vibrating with nerves. 

“Maybe we should call them.” Eddie suggested. 

“I can call Chim.” Maddie said as she pulled her phone out. 

They all waited as she made the call. Her smile turned slowly to a frown as it just kept ringing. She hung up when it went to voicemail. She dialed again and they watched as she waited , more tense than before. It too went unanswered. 

“Neither of them are answering. That’s not like Chim , Buck maybe.”

“We should head over there or something.” Eddie said. 

“What about the kids? And we all can’t go looking for them.” 

“I can see if someone can go by and check.” Athena said as she picked up the phone , walking into the kitchen. 

“They might just not have the volume up , can’t hear us. Then we’re all going to be embarrassed when they get here.” Hen said with an awkward chuckle. 

“I’d rather be embarrassed then something be wrong.” Eddie said. 

“Um...I called a friend that’s on shift. They got a call about ten minutes ago about a stabbing. Maddie it was at your apartment." 

"Oh my god!" Maddie cried.

"Let's get over there!" Eddie shouted and started for the door. 

"Dad wait for me." Christopher said.

Edide paused. If Buck was hurt Christopher didn't need to see that. He was at a loss as to what to do. The others looked about the same. 

"I'll stay with the kids." Michael said. 

"We'll help him." Hen stepped forward. 

"You guys go see what's what." Michael nodded to Athena, Bobby, Maddie and Eddie.

"We'll let you know what's going on when we get there." Eddie said , planting a kiss on Christopher's head before heading to his truck. Maddie right behind him. his truck. 

Maddie crawled in the passenger’s seat as Bobby and Athena climbed in the back. Eddie barely waited till the doors were closed before he was tearing out the driveway. He tried not to speed and run every light they came across. He wasn’t sure that Athena would let it slide if he did. 

“I can see the lights.” Maddie said as they turned onto the street. 

Eddie screeched to a halt at the curb in front of the apartment complex. He threw the truck in park and jumped out without even turning it off. Bobby came around to the driver’s side and reached in the still open door to retrieve the keys. All they needed was Eddie’s truck stolen. 

“I can’t let you folks through.” the cop working the tape line said as they came to it. 

“This is my apartment , my brother was home.” Maddie replied. 

“Wait , let me talk to someone inside.” he turned and spoke into his radio.

“This is bullshit. They could be really hurt in there.” Eddie said as they waited. 

“I understand , but there are procedures that they have to follow. You know this as well as anyone what with our line of work.” Athena tried to calm Eddie down. 

“Ok , they said you can go in , but only as far as the courtyard. There’s a detective waiting to talk to you there.” he told them as he lifted the tape for them to walk under. 

“Thank you.” Bobby said as they passed. 

They walked through to the courtyard where the detective was waiting. Athena knew that a detective wasn’t a good thing at a scene , but she kept quiet. Beyond the detectives and the courtyard the hallway to their apartment was roped off and there were techs taking pictures. The flash brightened the dark walkway. 

“Which one of you lives here?” the detective asked as they reached him.

“I do. Maddie Buckley. Is my brother alright?” 

“What’s your brother’s name?”

“Evan Buckley. Wait no, I think it’s still Kendall.”

“Was that the name?” he turned and asked the other cop next to him. He only shook his head and pointed at something in his notebook. 

“We don’t have an Evan Buckley or Kendall. We have a Howie Han though. Any of you know that person?”

“That’s our friend and co-worker , Chimney. Is he alright?” 

“He was stabbed. Someone called it in and we found him outside the apartment , a phone lying next to him and no one around. What was he doing here?” 

“I asked him to drop off a present. Did he know where Buck was?” Eddie didn’t like this. 

“Who’s Buck?” 

“That’s my brother , we call him Buck cause of our last name. He was here.” Maddie was trying to stay calm , the tears were running down her face at the thought of Chim being hurt. 

“There was no one here and no sign of struggle other than Mr. Han and the door being open. Is there anyone you can think of who would want to hurt Mr. Han or your brother?” 

“Oh god!” Maddie covered her mouth in horror. 

“What is it?” the detective asked. 

“His husband , Doug. My brother ran away after years of him beating him. A few months ago he had received a call from him. But then there was nothing more so we thought he didn’t know where to find him.” 

“What’s this husband’s name?”

“Doug Kendall. They lived in Pennsylvania.” Bobby wrapped an arm around her shoulders as she broke down crying. 

“Run that and let me know what you find.” the detective handed the name off to the cop. 

“What can we do?” Athena asked. 

“And you are?”

“Athena Grant , sergeant.” 

“Ah one of ours. Well , you know how these things go. You can go to the hospital and wait to hear from us and check on your friend.” 

“Thank you.” 

The detective walked back toward the apartment. They all stood there trying to see anything from where they were. The hallway had dark spots near the door and they all knew that was blood , Chim’s blood. There was the small box that Eddie had carefully wrapped and given to him to take to Buck’s. His heart clenched at the thought that he would never get to open it. 

“Let’s head to the hospital.” Athena suggested. 

They all climbed in Eddie’s truck , he took the back seat and didn’t say a word when Bobby slid in the driver’s seat. The ride to the hospital was a quiet affair , each lost in their own thoughts. Eddie stared out the window and wondered if Buck was alright wherever he was. 

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Buck watched the city fall away behind them as Doug ate up the miles between him and home. He had gotten his breathing under control. They had passed an ambulance as they left the neighborhood and Buck was confident they had gotten to Chim in time. He just hoped that he made it. No telling what damage the knife had done. 

“We should stop for gas. Do you need anything to eat or drink?” Dog asked breaking the silence in the car. 

“No.” Buck whispered.

“Quit pouting. You got to run off and be a firefighter. I bet you even had fun fucking other guys , like that one spic.” 

“What…” 

“The one you were at the Santa thing with. Has the messed up kid. Yeah , I saw you with him.” 

“Don’t talk about Christopher like that! He’s perfect the way he is. And Eddie isn’t a spic. He’s better than you , they both are.” he snapped , no one talked bad about Christopher. 

“When did you grow some balls?” Doug asked , striking lightening fast and smacking Buck across the face. His head smacked the window and he felt his lip split , tasting blood as he licked it. 

They kept driving through the dark , nothing to see out the window. Buck managed to stop the bleeding , he hated the taste of blood. After a bit he saw lights in the distance. Doug pulled into a small gas station and shut the car off. 

“You think you can behave?” Doug asked him. 

“I have to go to the bathroom.” 

“Fine , but if you try anything I promise you’ll regret it.” Doug cut the ties and walked around to his door to help him out. 

They walked in the store , it was empty save for the cashier at this time of night. They walked up to the counter , Doug keeping a tight grip on his arm. Buck tried to look like he needed help without alerting Doug. Buck spotted a marker on the shelf next to him.

“You have a bathroom?” 

“Yeah it’s around that way. Here’s the key.” the guy handed Doug a key with a huge wooden key chain. While Doug was getting the key Buck snatched the marker and hid it as quick as he could. 

Doug turned them around toward the restroom. It was a single so Buck was thankful that he would get to be alone. Doug gave him a look as he opened the door and headed in. As soon as the door was shut Buck looked around for a place to write a message for help. The mirror was too obvious , he was afraid that Doug would see it. 

“Hurry up in there.” Doug knocked on the door. 

Buck spun in fear to look at the door , worried that he might try to come in. As he stared at the door it came to him , the back of the door was a place he wouldn’t see it if he looked in. He quickly uncapped the marker and started writing on the door. 

_Evan Buckley kidnapped call 911 headed south._

“Answer me or I’m coming in.” Doug said through the door. 

“I’m almost done.” Buck looked around and saw the window. Maybe he could get out and hide until he left.    

Buck turned on the water so Doug would think he was still in there and to drown out any sound made by the window opening. He wrenched it open fairly easily and tumbled out head first , rolling when he hit the ground. 

Getting up and brushing the dirt off his body he turned and looked at the surroundings behind the store. There was a bunch of junk but not much in the way of hiding places. Feeling as though he was running out of time Buck turned to the right and searched for a place to tuck his body into.

As he rounded the corner at the back of the store he saw some pallets stacked up against the side of the building. Besides that the only thing he saw was a couple of metal barrels. Praying that they were empty he started to make his way toward them, hoping that he could squeeze his body into the small space.

Before he made it to the barrels he was hit from behind, his chest slamming into the ground knocking the wind out of him. He felt the weight of a body on top of him and felt his heart stop. He knew Doug had found him.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" Doug sneered in his ear, his hot breath puffing on his neck.

"Hey, what's going on out here?" The store clerk asked.

"It's none of your business. Go back in your store."

"Look man if you have problems you need to chill out. Are you okay sir? Do I need to call the cops?" He asked.

Buck felt Doug get off him and stand. Slowly he rolled up to his knees and stood. Buck turned to look at Doug and the clerk. The clerk was holding a gun, some type of revolver and it was aimed right at Doug's chest.

"Whoa." Buck whispered as he took in the gun. 

"Why don't you come with me man and we'll go inside and call the cops?" The clerk said to Buck. 

"Move and you're dead." Doug snapped at him. 

Buck just shook his head at the man. He didn’t need to make things worse. He watched as they stared at each other and prayed that the man would just let them go , that he would get to safety and call it in after they were gone. 

“We’re going to go now and you aren’t going to do a thing about it.” Doug told the guy as he slowly started walking toward him to go back out in front to the car.

Buck winced as Doug tightened his grip on his arm , knowing that it would bruise and followed along so he wasn’t dragging him. The clerk watched them move closer , gun still pointed at them. Buck felt that any moment the adrenaline was going to wear off and he was going to crash. 

As they got right in front of the clerk Buck had no time to react. Doug lunged at him as he flicked his eyes to Buck and grabbed the gun. The guy let it go and backed against the wall with his hands up. 

“You should have left it alone.” Doug said and pulled the trigger three times. 

Buck watched as the man jerked with every bullet. Bright red blossoming on his white shirt. He felt his mind kind of disconnect. Like he was on auto-pilot. He knew what was happening , he was going into shock. 

“And you shouldn’t have run. Now look what you did , he’s dead because you can’t be a good husband and do as you’re told.” Doug grabbed him again and drug him to the car. 

He took the time to fill the tank , skipping on paying cause what was theft compared to murder. Then they were off again. Buck noted dimly that they were still headed south thank God. He hoped that something or someone ended this before Doug killed anymore people. 

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“Do you have anything?” Eddie asked as the detective came in the waiting room at the hospital. 

“We pulled some footage off a few cameras in the building. There’s a man that comes in behind Mr. Han and then a few minutes later is leaving with Mr. Buckley.” 

“That has to be Doug. Can you track them anyway?”  Maddie asked. 

“We don’t have a cell number for him and your brother’s cell was left at the scene. There’s no cameras that catch the car they left in so we have no idea what they’re driving even if we had a direction. We’re still pulling financial records for Doug so maybe he’ll use that and we’ll get him. We just have to wait and see.” 

“Wait and see?! He could be hurting him right now and you want to wait?” Eddie yelled , getting in the detective’s face. 

“Whoa , down boy.” Athena said pushing him back and down the hall. 

“That asshole wants to wait , Buck could be dead if we wait too long.” Eddie growled at her. 

“I know , but what do you want that man to do , pull a rabbit out his ass?” 

“I don’t know. I just know we have to do something , we can’t let that fucker hurt him again.” Eddie looked at her with desperation. 

“I know , but we have to wait. You told him yet?” she asked him. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“That you love him. Have you told Buck that you love him?” Athena asked slowly. 

“I don’t….” he looked quickly toward the others.

“It’s ok , I’m not going to go telling secrets that aren’t mine. Just don’t wait alright , sometimes it’s too late.” she smiled at him and walked back to Bobby.

“We’re gonna go check on Chim , see if they have any news.” Maddie told him. 

He sat there , thinking about what Athena had said. She had a point sometimes things were too late. He needed to tell Shannon that he loved Buck and then he wanted to tell the whole house. Hell the whole world. He just hoped that she wouldn’t try to take Christopher. 

He needed Buck right now. 

“Yeah , what do you have?” he heard the detective answer his phone.

“So he rented a black 2010 nissan...we pick that plate number up on any of the cameras...headed south...okay let’s get a team together and start that way. In the meantime call down to some of the other districts and make them aware of the situation.” 

Eddie waited until the detective was gone before he stood up. He knew if the man saw him leaving , figured out that he had heard all that , he would make sure he stayed here. He had a car and direction. He was getting Buck back , even if he had to kill that son of a bitch himself. 

“Where are you going?” Athena said making him jump. 

“Out for a little air?” Eddie tried for nonchalant. 

“Would that air happen to be to the south?” she gave him the look.

“How did you?” 

“You aren’t the only one who can sneak. What do you plan to do , go chasing after him? And if you find him , then what?” 

“I will get Buck back. I can’t just stay here and sit on my ass , not knowing if he’s alive or dead.” 

“I know , but you can’t go alone.” 

“What are you saying?” he looked at her. 

“I’m coming with you.” 

“Can’t you get in trouble for that?” 

“What can I say , that boy grows on you.” 

They made their way out of the hospital and into his truck. Eddie drove south as Athena pulled a police radio out of her pocket. He looked over as she flicked it on. He was sure that she hadn’t had that when they left her house. 

“I took it off that one cop , the one that looked like he couldn’t find his way to his own home. We can keep up with what they know.” she explained. 

“Remind me never to get on your bad side.” 

_“We have a 187 at a mini mart twenty miles south of L.A. on the 405. Think it might be the BOLO suspect.”_

“Let’s go.” Athena told Eddie as she put the address in her GPS. 

Eddie stomped on the gas.

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“Hey , wake up. We’re here.” Doug shook him awake. 

Buck looked around , sure that they hadn’t made it back to Pennsylvania that fast. They were in the mountains it was morning , there was snow on the ground and cabins scattered all around. They all looked deserted though. Buck was starting to lose hope that someone would help him. 

He was thinking more and more of getting himself out of this situation. He was stronger than he had been a year ago. He wasn’t the cowering man that had left Doug , he had saved lives and faced down things that made others shake in fear. 

Doug parked the car and drug him out toward a cabin far back from the entrance. He let go of him to bust in the door. Obviously he wasn’t stupid enough to pay for the place with his kidnap victim. 

"We can start a fire , warm the place up a bit. In the morning we'll get back on the road." Doug said and pulled the knife out of his pocket and cut the ties again. 

"Why can't you just let me go?" Buck looked at him.

"I love you Evan." 

"You don't hurt the ones you love." Buck sneered at him.

"I wouldn't have to hurt you if you learned to do as I expect , as you're told." 

Buck looked away from him. There was no use in arguing with him. He was always right even when he was wrong. Buck saw the iron fireplace tools. 

"You remember that year we went skiing for the senior trip and we stayed in the same room?" Buck asked.

"You mean when we kicked Terry out so we could bunk together? Of course. That was the first time we made love." 

"Remember what happened when we didn't open the flue on the fireplace before we started it." 

"Yeah , I better check that." Doug walked up and gave him a kiss , Buck fought the urge to flinch back. 

As soon as he turned to kneel in front of the fireplace Buck grabbed one of the pokers. He walked quietly up behind Doug and waited till he pulled his head back.

"It looks fine…" Doug began but Buck wacking his head like a major league batter stopped his sentence.

As soon as he fell to the floor , blood pouring out the side of his head Buck ran out the door. Not even thinking about the car he ran off into the woods. After a few minutes he stopped to breathe and look around. 

"EVAN!" Doug yelled far closer than Buck liked. 

He turned and ran further up the mountain looking for anything to keep him safe.

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Eddie found the little convenience store with no problem. The place was swarming with cops and he hoped that it wasn't Buck. He felt his stomach roll and his heart race as they parked and got out. 

"Sorry folks this is a crime scene. There's another gas station about 15 miles that way." A cop said as they approached. 

"I'm sergeant Athena Grant from L.A. , we're trying to find a kidnap victim. Think this might be connected." Athena pulled her badge out. 

"Well , that was fast. I'll ignore the regulations you've broken and let you help. We have a body , but it doesn't belong to either the suspect or our vic." The detective from the hospital said as he walked up. He had just arrived.

"What now?" Eddie asked.

"We think they continued south , but are probably going to stop for a while , get some rest and wait the heat out. There's a few places they can do that. We need help checking them." 

"We can do that." Eddie jumped at the chance to find Buck.

"Alright , you take a cabin retreat up the road a ways and we'll check the campgrounds and the rest area after that." 

"Thank you." Athena said. 

"Keep in contact and let us know if you find anything." The detective said and handed her his number. 

They took off back to the truck and headed toward the cabin retreat. Eddie was holding it together with bubble gum and a prayer inside. He knew that if something happened to Buck , he would lose it. 

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Buck found a place to hide in the trees , hoping that Doug left him but preparing to fight. He had a lot to fight for back home. His job , his friends , Eddie and the family they could be with Christopher. He realized as he settled down in his hiding spot he still had the iron poker in a death grip.

He sat there , cold and shaking for what felt like hours. His breath sounding as loud as an airline engine. Watching through the trees for any movement. He started to relax the longer it went with no sound or movement. 

"Got you!" Doug yelled jumping in front of the opening to his hiding place. 

"No!" Buck yelled and tried to swing the poker but there wasn't room. 

Doug gripped it and threw it out behind him after he wrenched it out of Buck's grasp. Then he drug Buck out by his hair. 

"You're starting to be more trouble than you're worth." Doug snapped , spit hitting Buck's face with how close Doug was. 

"Then just let me go." Buck pleaded. 

"So I can go to jail for stabbing that guy? No way. If I can't have you , no one will." Doug thrust him away and pulled the gun from his pocket. 

Buck stood there looking at the gun pointed at him and felt peace fall over him. He didn't want to die but if he had to he was going out on his feet , staring death in the face. He would miss Eddie and Christopher most. But if there was a heaven , a life after this he would be looking over them. Doug pulled the trigger. 

It pierced Buck's side , the shot going wide. Buck yelped at the burn of it but felt it go out his back. He stumbled back a little and looked wide eyed at Doug. He watched him re-aim and pull the trigger again. He braced for a killing shot.

_Click_.

The sound both unknown and deafening in the forest. They stood frozen , confused. Then Buck snapped back to reality and lunged for the poker Doug had thrown. It was now the only weapon. 

"No , you don't!" Doug yelled and punched Buck causing him to stumble back. 

Doug spun around looking for the poker. Buck shook the punch off and searched frantically for it. He spotted it off to the right of Doug. He he hadn't seen it yet and he tried for it without drawing his attention. 

"Where is it?!" Doug yelled , flinging snow all over. 

"Right here motherfucker!" Buck swung the poker at Doug's head.

It made a sickening _crack_ sound as it connected. Doug crumpled to his knees , his hands flying to his head. Buck took no more chances , it was him or Doug. And he had a family to get back to. 

"Never again!" Buck yelled and grabbed the poker like a pitchfork and shoved with all his weight right into Doug's chest. 

_"Ugh…"_ Doug kind of huffed out and looked down at the poker buried six inches in his chest. 

_"I didn't think...you...had..it in...you…"_ Doug stuttered out , blood pouring from his mouth. 

Buck stood there as Doug's body fell forward , the poker shoving further into his body before it slid no more. He was propped up like some grotesque puppet. Buck felt shaky and like crying all at once. 

He turned and walked back the way he had come. The scenery was unfamiliar , he had been running for his life , he hadn't exactly left bread crumbs. He looked around and found footprints to follow. 

It felt like he had been walking for an hour and was beginning to worry that he was lost. That was all he needed was to die of exposure in the woods after surviving Doug. 

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Eddie and Athena drove slowly through the cabin retreats. They looked for any sign of the car or Buck. When they made it a few cabins in they saw a woman walking. 

"Excuse me ma'am , have you seen anyone up here? It would be two men." Athena asked as they pulled alongside her.

"No one renting , we're closed for the season , but there was another car that came through about an hour ago. I seen it when the motion sensor alarm went off." 

"Hop in and you can show us the rest of the cabins." Eddie popped the locks. 

They drove further down the winding roadway. Towards the end they spotted a black Nissan parked outside a cabin , door busted in. 

"Stay here." Athena told them and grabbed her gun out her ankle holster. 

She swept the cabin , noting it was empty other than blood on the floor. She came back out and waved to Eddie. He and the woman came in , both taking in the scene. 

"They're not here. Where could they go?" Eddie looked around , nothing but woods for miles. 

Eddie looked down at the blood and felt his stomach churn. He prayed it wasn't Buck's. He didn't know how he was going to tell Christopher if something happened to him.

He looked at the blood hoping for some answers. And noticed more toward the door. 

"Look the blood goes over here too. I think we can follow it." Eddie said and was out the door. 

"Wait , Eddie we need to call it in." Athena yelled , but Eddie was off and running. 

He ran off the path into the woods hoping the trail wouldn't end before he found them. He refused to think of Buck lying dead at the end of it. 

He ran up a hill footprints in the snow now occupying the bloody trail. He was focused on the trail only looking up to make sure he wasn't going off a cliff so it took a minute to see the figure stumbling over the rocks below.

"BUCK?!" Eddie yelled once he realized who it was. He flew down to him. 

"Eddie...what are you...how did you find me?" Buck looked at him like he was seeing a ghost.

"We got lucky checking this place and I followed the blood. Are you ok? Where is he?" Eddie looked behind Buck.

"He's dead. I stabbed him with a fire poker. He's back there." Buck pointed over his shoulder.

"God , I'm so glad I found you. I'm so proud of you." Eddie gripped his waist and surged up to kiss him , but stopped when Buck flinched and hissed. 

"Are you okay?" Eddie asked.

"He shot me." Buck hissed as he tried to see the wound. 

"What?! Buck." 

"Is that Athena?" Buck asked looking over Eddie's shoulder. 

Eddie turned and saw Athena coming down the hill. He felt his face heat up , had she seen them kissing? 

"Is he ok?" She yelled down.

"He's been shot. He killed him." Eddie yelled back. 

"I'll call it in." She pulled the radio out her belt and called for an ambulance. 

Eddie turned back to inspect the wound. It was above his hip and a through and through. It was bleeding sluggishly but Eddie was worried about it nicking the bowel. 

"Thank you for coming for me." Buck said. 

"Always." Eddie said smiling at him. 

Buck smiled back and Eddie watched as his eyes twitched and rolled back in his head. He caught him before he hit the ground. He swung him up in his arms and turned to carry him back to the cabin. 

He'd drive him to the hospital himself if he had to. 

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Buck woke up warm and to a beeping sound. He looked around and realized he was in the hospital. Eddie was passed out with his head on Buck's hand. He smiled. 

"Hey you're awake." Maddie said. 

"Yeah. How long was I out?" 

"About three hours.

"Is Chim?"

"He made it. The knife was close to his spine. They want to keep him for a while."

"What about me?" 

"They want to watch for infection. There was a little nick to your bowel they repaired it. Gonna be on bed rest for a little bit." 

"Where are the others?" 

"They have been hanging out with Chim. I figured Eddie needed you to himself." 

"Buck…" Eddie said as he looked around in confusion. 

"I'm here." Buck squeezed his hand. 

"I'll go get you something to drink." Maddie said and left. 

"You passed out in my arms. Not the reaction I was looking for." 

"I'm sorry." 

"Listen before everyone rushes us I wanted to talk to you."

Buck felt his heart drop. The monitor showed it. He should have known that there was a line that Eddie would deem too far. 

"I get it I do. We don't have to talk about it." 

"What are you talking about?" Eddie looked at him confused. 

"Uh...what are you talking about?" 

"I thought about it while you were missing. I want to tell Shannon and then the rest of the station. About us." 

"Are you sure? What about Christopher?" Buck asked. 

"He'll be fine with us." 

"I meant if she tries to take him." 

"I'll win." 

Buck looked at Eddie. He had never known someone who gave so much of themselves to him. Doug had never cared so much. 

"What happened to Doug? Did I kill him?"

"Yeah , you did." 

"Thank god." Buck said and started crying in relief. 

"It's ok." Eddie said holding him to his chest as he let it all out.

"Athena saw us I think." 

"Yeah , I did but I won't tell. It's your story to tell." Athena said as she walked in the room. 

"Is everything alright?" Eddie asked as they pulled apart. 

"Yeah , the others are getting restless. I figured I'd come to warn you." 

"Thanks." Buck said. 

"You grow on me kid." She said. 

"Can you stall them for a few minutes?" Eddie asked.

"I can try." Athena said and left again. 

"So what do you think?"

"About coming out to the station and your wife?"

"Yeah. I want to be with you. I want the world to know." 

"Of it's ok with you , it's ok with me." 

"Hey , did Chim get to give you your present?" Eddie asked.

"No , he was stabbed as soon as I opened the door." 

"God." 

"What was it?" 

"I found the puppy , Copper. He didn't kill him. He dropped him off at a shelter and he ended up here. I went down and adopted him. The gift was the paperwork."

"You adopted him?" 

"We adopted him. My names on it but he's yours. We were supposed to pick him up today , but I'll call and let them know what happened." 

"Is it too early to say I love you?" Buck asked through tears. 

"I love you too." Eddie gasped out and leaned forward to kiss him. 

Eddie pulled back and smiled at him. He was happier than he had ever been. His heart was racing in excitement. Noise from the door caught his attention. He watched as Christopher led the convoy of other visitors. 

"I can't wait to tell them." Eddie whispered. 

Doug was dead. He was free. Now he had coming out with Eddie to look forward to and his puppy. He had everything to look forward to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment comment comment. I love them and love to hear what you think , like , hate etc. Almost to the new season , then they will go slower.


	12. Boom Goes The Neighborhood

"Oh come on! Do you really have to do that? I think I'm going to be sick." Buck says as he walked into Chimney's hospital room and saw Maddie kissing Chimney.

"Well , if you don't like it stay in your own room." Maddie told him. 

"I just wanted to come check on him. I mean he did get stabbed coming to see me."

"Don't worry about it man. There's no hard feelings. It's not like you planned for your ex-husband to try to kill me."

"So how come they let you walk around?" Maddie asked.

"They're letting me out. I get to go home but I'm still not back to work yet." Buck told her, he was still upset he was off duty.

"Do you need a ride? I can take you back to the apartment. Although it's still kind of a crime scene at the moment." Maddie said. 

"Don't worry about it , Eddie is coming to get me and I'm gonna stay with him. I just can't go back there right now." Buck ducked his head. 

He had been having nightmares , back in the woods with Doug. Only this time he didn't win. Doug got the best of him and even killed Eddie. He had awoken drenched in sweat and heart racing quite a few times. 

"Oh , that's nice." Chim said. 

"Yeah , I'm sure you'll be  _ well  _ taken care of." Maddie smirked at him. 

"Hey , there you are." Eddie said as he came in the room. 

"Yeah wanted to come see Chim before I left." 

"Well , take care of yourself. I got three more days before I can get out." Chim told them.

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"So , we have only two rooms and there's no way I'm letting you sleep on the couch after you got shot." Eddie said as they came through his front door. 

"Well , what are we doing then?" 

"You're sleeping in my bed of course. I want to tell Christopher about us first. Then when you're ready to get back to work we can go in together and talk to Bobby." 

"When do you plan to tell Shannon?" Buck asked as he settled on the couch. His muscles were sore from all the walking. 

"I want to tell her after Christopher , but before Bobby." 

"You have this all planned out don't you?" Buck smiled at him. 

"Yes , I do. Now after Christopher gets out of school I was thinking we go pick up Copper."

"I think that's a good plan. What does he think about getting a dog?" 

"He's excited. Always wanted one but I was worried when he was a baby that he would pull on it's ears or tail and the dog would snap at him." Eddie sat down next to him. 

"What about jumping? We can't have a dog that knocks him over."

"I went to see him already remember , he's not a jumper. He'll do fine with Christopher." 

Buck leaned into Eddie , his head resting on his shoulder. Eddie wrapped his arm around Buck and kissed the top of his head. Buck sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. 

"Buck! Buck's here!" He heard Christopher say sometime later , he had dozed off.

"Yeah , buddie he's here , but he was hurt remember so we gotta be easy with him." Eddie said. 

Buck continued to lay there with his head on Eddie's shoulder and pretend to be asleep. He liked where he was and didn't want to move. 

"Where's your mom?" Eddie asked. It was her night with him last night.

"She's getting my stuff out of the car." 

"Let's let Buck sleep." Eddie said and carefully extracted his arm from behind Buck's head.

Eddie went out to the front porch to help carry Christopher's stuff in. Shannon followed him into the house. Eddie put the stuff in Christopher's room and left him to put it up. He was particular about where things went.

"Why is he asleep on your couch?" Shannon asked as he came out. 

"He's staying here for a while. His place is a crime scene and he's recovering from a gunshot wound." 

"So he can get a hotel room. Or stay with his sister." 

"He was living with his sister. She's staying at Chimney's place since he's still in the hospital and they are dating." Eddie told her , not liking her tone.

"But he's here. How safe is that for Christopher?" 

"Buck loves him and would never let anything happen to him. Why would you think he wasn't safe?" 

"Well he did just get kidnapped and shot." Shannon pointed out. 

"By his crazy ex-husband who is now dead. There's no more threat." Eddie couldn't believe this shit.

"So he's gay. Wow." 

"What's that supposed to mean?!" 

"I think it's weird how close he is to you." 

"Dad , can you come help me?" Christopher's voice cut off his argument. 

"Coming." Eddie said and went to help his son.

He was fuming inside. How dare she say the things she did. Insinuating that Buck was a danger to Christopher. He felt like punching something. Knowing her she would just keep on. Mind made up, he decided he was telling them now.

“Hey , bud what do you need?” Eddie asked as he came in the room.

“Can you lift the bag onto the bed?” Christopher asked. 

“Sure , hey I want to talk to you about something” Eddie said as he put the bag on the bed. 

“What about , Dad?” Christopher sat down.

“I wanted to talk about Buck. More specifically me and Buck. You know that I love you and that I loved your mother , right?” 

“I know dad , but sometimes people aren’t meant to be right?” 

“Where’d you hear that?”

“Miss Athena’s kids. Their father doesn’t live with them anymore because he was meant to be there Dad , but not with their mother. He likes boys.” 

“Yeah , he does. What do you think about him liking boys?” Eddie felt this was going better than he hoped. 

“I think that’s fine. Not everyone likes the same things.” 

“That’s right. What if I told you that I liked Buck?” 

“I like Buck too!” Christopher smiled. 

“I know you do , but I mean like moms like dads.” 

“You mean like a boyfriend?” Christopher stared up at him and Eddie felt nervous. 

“Yeah , like that.” 

“Oh. Ok as long as he still lets me have ice cream when he picks me up from school.” 

“So that’s what takes you two so long.” Eddie laughed in relief. 

“I love Buck dad. It’s ok if you love him too.” 

Eddie gave Christopher a hug. He couldn’t believe that it had been that easy. He had been terrified that he wouldn’t want Buck around like that or that he wouldn’t understand and find it disgusting. He should know better than to assume how Christopher would react. 

“I’m going to go tell your mom now. She might yell at me and not take it as well as you. I want you to stay here and ignore what you hear.” 

“Ok daddy.” 

Eddie came back into the living room. Buck was still asleep on the couch , but Shannon was sneering at him. Eddie couldn’t understand why she hated Buck so much. Maybe she knew that Eddie loved him. 

“So are you going to get him a room elsewhere?” Shannon asked as she saw him return. 

“No. Listen we need to talk Shannon.”

“About what?” she looked at him. 

“This. Me , you and Buck.” 

“What does he have to do with us?”

“There is no us. I never told you that I was into men as well. When you got pregnant , that was it. Me and you for life. But then you left and abandoned our son. That was when I learned that we can’t keep lying to ourselves. I love Buck.” 

“You’re a...a…” she stuttered , angry beyond words.

“I’m bi actually. But I do tend to lean more towards men.” 

“I have never been so insulted in my life! You could have given me something!” she screeched. 

“I was never unfaithful. And liking men , enjoying sex with men does not mean that I am diseased.” Eddie’s tone took on a cold edge to it. 

“And I suppose he’s one too.” She pointed at Buck. Eddie looked at him , he still looked as though he was sleeping , but Eddie was sure that he was pretending. 

“He’s gay. Remember the crazy ex-husband?” Eddie gently reminded her. 

“Of course , the one who shot him. You don’t expect me to let my son be around this mess do you?” she sneered at him. 

“It’s 2019 , time to lose the homophobic attitude. Besides I doubt the fact that I’m with a man will be worse in a judges eyes than a mother who abandoned her special needs son.” Eddie told her , anger flashed in his eyes. 

“I’m leaving. Don’t expect me to take this lying down.” she snapped and grabbed her things , slamming the door behind her as she went. 

“I’m sorry that happened. I should have stayed at my place.” Buck said as he sat up.

“Buck , no that was going to go like that no matter who was around or where we were. She needed to know the truth about me even if I wasn’t with you.” 

“I guess. Did you talk to Christopher?” 

“Yes , I did. He said he was fine with it as long as you still got him ice cream on the way home from school. Want to tell me how long that’s been going on?” Eddie crossed his arms. 

“I wanted him to like me and everyone likes ice cream. I’m sorry.” Buck started to get upset. 

“Buck , I was joking. I don’t care that you guys get ice cream. I love that you love my kid and you guys have fun. Ok , even if I was mad I’d never do anything.” Eddie sat next to him , running his hands up his arms in comfort. 

“I know inside my head that you wouldn’t hurt me or do anything. I think with what happened with Doug it’s brought all my old issues up.” 

“It’s ok. We can work through that until you feel better , more like your new self.” 

“Thank you. I love you.” Buck whispered. 

“I love you too Buck.” Eddie told him and leaned in to kiss him. 

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Buck was still off duty. He had to be cleared by the doctors , pass his re evaluation tests and be cleared by the big bosses. So while he was out of work he took care of Christopher and Eddie after shift. They would lay in bed and talk about all the weird and crazy calls they had gone on that day. Buck missed being at work , but he was loving the bonding with Christopher. 

Plus they had brought home Copper. He was a weird one. As a puppy he had been a little crazy , but Buck thought that he would have grown out of that. He was wrong. He was house trained and great around Christopher. 

It was the odd things he did. He made zero sound when he ran into a wall or turned to soon in a door jamb. He loved to roll onto his back and push with his back legs against the couch or wall and scoot around the house. And those bat ears never laid down. 

“I want to take you on a date and talk about things.” Buck said. 

He had been thinking in his long hours away from Eddie about the future. He loved being here and he dreaded leaving when he was healed. He wanted his whole life with Eddie and Christopher. He wanted to marry him and adopt Christopher. He wanted them to live together forever. 

“I think that can be arranged. I’m off tomorrow , I can get Carla to watch him for us.” 

“I’ll make the plans.” 

“It’s a date.” Eddie said kissing him before finishing getting dressed. 

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Eddie worried all shift exactly what Buck wanted to talk about. He knew it was irrational to think that Buck would just move in with him. This was way to early in a relationship to be moving in or thinking about marriage and adoption. He wanted Buck to be his husband , divorcing Shannon was going to be difficult and he wanted Buck to be his other parent , legally. 

“We got an explosion. Some woman got a package in the mail and it exploded.” Bobby explained as they rode up on the scene. 

“Serial bomber or what?” Chim asked.

“That’s not our job. We get the woman taken care of and leave that part to the cops.” 

They took care of the woman , she had picked the package up off her porch , not through the mail. She had taken most of it to the left side of her body. She was not good , but it could have been worse. It had been her anniversary with her husband. 

Eddie thought about Buck. 

They spent the rest of shift dealing with a power outage in the city. This shit happened every time the temperatures got too hot. They had to go old school , radios and road maps. Maddie and the call center did great directing them where to go. 

They had a call with a pregnant woman who was older and this was her miracle baby. She delivered in the lobby of a hotel. Eddie reminisced about when Christopher was born. But then she was going into distress and they were losing her. Once they reached the hospital she was gone , her husband met them at the doors a father , but now a widower. 

“There has to be something you can do!” he yelled. 

“I am very sorry sir.” Hen told him , she was taking it hard. 

“I don’t care if you’re sorry. I want my wife back. I don’t know how to be a parent , she was better than me at that stuff.” he cried. 

“It’s not going to be easy , but you can do it. You look into that baby’s eyes and pull yourself together. You take it one day at a time and before you know it it’ll be over. You’ll look back and still have no idea how you made it.” Eddie told him. 

“Ok.” the man kissed his baby and held him out to put him against the still warm skin of his mother. 

Hen was waiting to call time of death. After a few moments of the baby snuffling against his mother the man bent down and kissed her goodbye one last time. Hen took the stethoscope and prepared to call it. 

“Wait! I have a heartbeat. It’s barely there , but it’s there!” they rushed to get her into the hospital , there was still hope. 

Eddie spent the ride back to the station thinking about how precious life really was. He couldn’t wait to be home with his boys. The rest of shift drug on. Finally he was off and made it home , finding a plate for him in the microwave he scarfed it down. He looked in on Christopher and then crawled in bed with Buck. 

“Hey , babe.” Buck rolled over , kissing him and snuggling into him. 

“How was your day?” Eddie asked. 

“Things were fine. I got all of Christopher’s homework done and we made dinner together. I had a dr appointment today.”

“How did that go?”

“It went alright. I mean they did clear me for duty and I take my recerts in a few weeks. I can start training and doing regular activity.”

“That’s great baby. But did you really have to tell me that you can do anything when I just worked the shift from hell?” Eddie groaned , he would love to help Buck work his muscles , but he was exhausted. 

“Don’t worry, there's plenty of time for that tomorrow after our date.” Buck grinned , leaning up to give him a passionate kiss before rolling over , pulling Eddie’s arm around him. 

They fell asleep wrapped up in each other.  

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Buck insisted that he pick Eddie up for their date. He went as far as going to Chimney's house changing. He had a bag slung over his arm as he kissed Eddie on his way out the door. 

"So where are you taking him?" Maddie asked , she was helping him get ready since no one else knew and she had volunteered.

"I thought about a nice restaurant , but that's not really us you know. I did that with Abby and ended up with a tracheostomy." 

"You do have some bad luck." 

"Yeah , psycho husband , emergency tracheotomy. At least this time should go smoothly."  

"You know you probably just jinxed yourself right?"

Buck looked at her. He wasn't really superstitious. Then again he did have some seriously bad luck and there was the thing about bad juju Hen always talked about. Maybe he should be a little worried. He knocked on the wooden dresser just in case.

"I'm taking him around the lake and a picnic. They're doing A Christmas Story movie night in the park." 

"It's after Christmas." Maddie looked at him confused.

"It's the last night they're showing it." 

"I think it's sweet." Maddie smiled at him. It had been a while since she had seen him so excited. 

"What if he doesn't like it?" Buck asked looking at himself in the mirror. 

He was wearing a blue button up and a worn pair of jeans. His white tee peeking out where he had undone the top two buttons. He looked sad , old insecurities popping up since Doug. 

"Buck , he already likes you. He knows about Doug and he found Copper for you. That man has it bad for you and he'll like anything." 

"He told me he loved me." Buck looked at her and quirked the corner of his mouth up , looking the picture of embarrassed/proud. 

"Buck! When did this happen?"

"In the hospital , after I kinda said I loved him too."

"You two are something else."

"I never had this before. I don't know what to do." 

"It's going to be ok Buck. You deserve this. I'm sorry you didn't know that before now." Maddie told him , tears in her eyes.

"Hey , don't go crying. I kept it from you , there was nothing you could do to help when I wouldn't ask for help."

"Fine. Now get going before your late." Maddie pushed him a little.

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Eddie was nervous. He had changed his shirt three times. One was too dressy , one was to plain. He was looking at the long sleeved white shirt he had on , trying to decide if it was right. 

"I like that dad." Christopher told him as he came in the bedroom. 

"Oh yeah , but are you sure?"

"Buck will like it. He's not picky dad." 

"I just want tonight to be good. He planned it and put all the effort in to it " 

"I think as long as you have fun he'll be happy." 

"Thanks , bud." Eddie said deciding to go with the shirt he was wearing. 

"You have fun tonight." Carla told him as he came in the living room with Christopher. 

"I will. Thanks for watching him for me." Eddie told her. 

"You deserve to have a good time. Especially after all that has gone on lately." 

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"I hope you like where we're going and what we're doing tonight." Buck said as he got in the truck after helping Eddie in. 

"I'm sure I will. So where are we going?" They had agreed to take Eddie's truck for the room and Buck was driving since he made the plans.

"I was thinking we take a picnic at the lake and the last showing of A Christmas Story." 

"I love that movie. Christopher and I do the marathon every year. If he gets too wild during the year I tell him I'll buy him that bunny suit if he doesn't behave."

"That is all kinds of wrong!"

"Yeah , but it works. So what kind of stuff did you pack us to eat?"

"I figured some finger foods and snacks. Some veggies with dip and some meats , cheese and crackers." Buck told him as they reached the parking lot. 

"I can deal with that. Nothing too heavy. Too bad we can’t have some wine or something with it.” 

“I brought some chocolate and strawberries for after the meat though. Can you grab the blankets out of the back?” 

“Yeah , anything else?” Eddie asked , grabbing the blankets from the back seat. 

“No , I have the rest of it. Follow me.” 

Buck led them through the park , it was filled with other people. Some couples and some families. Eddie thought they were going to get a place near the middle , but Buck kept on walking. He had his own spot , higher up and covered by some trees and a few bushes. 

“Why Buck , this is quite the hidden spot.” Eddie teased. 

“I want it to feel like it’s just us. I used to come here a lot and found this place then.” 

“Oh , when did you find it?” 

“It was right when I came here. I...was well I was homeless and sometimes I didn’t get a place in the shelters so I came to the parks. It was nice in the summer.” 

“Buck , the things that you have lived through. I want to wrap you up in bubble wrap and keep you tucked away safe from the world , living the life of luxury.” 

“I know my past , it’s crazy. I am the same person I was months ago.” 

“I know , it just makes me think you’re all that more special. You have lived through shit that would kill other people.”

“Alright , let’s watch the movie before you make me cry.” Buck ducked his head blushing. 

"So I wanted to talk about things. Like what the future is going to be like." Buck told him.

"Ok. Let's talk about it." 

"Do you want me to find my own place?" Buck asked.

"I'm happy having you with us. I see a future with you Buck. I want to live with you , marry you and you be Christopher's other father." Eddie told him seriously. 

"Wow. I don't know what to say." Buck looked at him. 

"It was too much wasn't it? Damn it I didn't want to fuck it up." Eddie said.

"No , I want that too. I want my future with you." Buck said and kissed him.

"Alright. Let's get back to the movie." Eddie smiled softly at him. 

They spent most of the date watching the movie in silence. Except for the occasional laugh. They ate the meat on crackers with cheese. There were sodas Buck had packed. After they ate they laid together on the blanket , using the other to cover up with. They laid facing each other , bodies angled so they could still watch the movie. 

Though the further it got in the evening the less they watched it. They shared looks , some casual touches and increasingly frequent kisses.  

"Are you trying to seduce me Mr. Buckley?" Eddie smiled as he leaned it to kiss Buck again.

"Mmm depends. Is it working?" Buck licked at the seam of Eddie's lips and he opened them for him. 

"I think so." Eddie panted out , turning his head to the side for Buck to continue to kiss his neck. 

Buck slid closer , his body flush with Eddie's. His right arm holding him up and his left running up his neck to cradle the back of Eddie's head , pulling him closer.

"Buck." Eddie moaned as he reached the junction of his neck and shoulder , nipping at it and sending arousal shooting through his body.

"Yeah babe?" Buck smiled , licking the spot.

"If you keep that up, we're going to be arrested for sure."  Eddie's hips jerked against Buck's , erections pressing together through the layers. 

"Let's get out of here. Go somewhere we can't get arrested." Buck said as he pulled back , his pupils blown nearly completely out. 

"Carla is at the house with Christopher." Eddie groaned.

"I'm staying with you and my place is still a crime scene. Shit this sucks." 

"We can get a room?" Eddie suggested.

"You are worth more than some pay by the hour motel room. I have an idea."

Buck stood , adjusted his erection and started grabbing the stuff to carry back to the truck. He had the perfect place in mind. They made it back to the truck and loaded it up. Buck aimed them toward the outskirts of the city , toward the less populated areas. 

"If I didn't trust you I'd think you were taking me to the woods to murder me." Eddie joked watching the sky flash with lightning. 

"You're too hot to be murdered." Buck laughed.

"You think it'll rain?" 

"It might but it'll be fine. Unless you're afraid to get a little wet?" 

"Not afraid of anything." Eddie smirked at him. 

They drove up to a secluded hiking trail aways off the main road. There were camping areas and restrooms but this time of year it was still too warm for most people to come. Buck parked backed up to a secluded wooded area and they climbed out. 

"I miss the stars sometimes." Eddie said as they looked up at the twinkling night sky , visible now that they were away from the lights of the city.

"I forget they exist sometimes. Been living in L.A. too long." Buck grabbed the blankets and dropped the tailgate. 

He laid the blankets in the bed and turned to Eddie. He was watching him , his eyes glowing in the dark with lust. The lightning flashed , illuminating them for a second. 

"You sure about this?" Buck asked.

"More than anything." Edide told him and backed him up against the tailgate.

He kissed him roughly hands roaming , pulling him against him. He groaned into the kiss , his erection pressing against the zipper and Buck's. He slid his hands down to his hips and without warning he lifted Buck to sit on the tailgate.  

"Fuck." Buck threw his head back as Eddie reached for the hem of his shirt.

"Can I?"

"God , yes!" Buck moaned and lifted his arms. 

Eddie pulled his shirt over his head and kissed his chest. Buck leaned back on his elbows to give him room to explore. His tongue dragging across his abs made them tense at the sensation. 

"Eddie...please." 

"Tell me what you want. I need to hear it." Eddie told him bracing himself above Buck. 

"Please , make love to me. No one's ever made love to me." Buck put his hand on Eddie's cheek. 

"Yes." Eddie dipped his head down and kissed him softly , rocking his hips against Buck's. 

The thunder rumbled as the lightning flashed around them. Buck peeled Eddie's shirt off and together they stripped each other of their pants. Panting together in their boxers , watching each other in the flashes. 

"How do you want to do this?" Eddie asked. 

"I want you in me. My jean pocket has everything." Buck looked up at him. 

"You came prepared." Eddie smiled. 

"Never hurts to be prepared."

Eddie stepped back and dug in the pants , pulling out a small packet of lube and a condom. He walked back in between Buck's legs and saw that he had stripped the boxers off. 

"Buck." He gasped taking in the tan skin , his erection standing tall , protruding from a nest of blond curls at the base.

"See something you like?" Buck chuckled nervously. 

"Yes." Eddie set the stuff on the tailgate beside him and pulled his own boxers down. 

Buck watched as he exposed his own thick cock , a trimmed patch of dark hair at it's base. He wasn't as long as Buck but he was thicker. Buck just knew he was gonna be feeling that for a while. 

"Come here." Buck reached for Eddie. 

He came easily. Buck surged up as soon as he was flush against him and plunged his tongue into his mouth , bracing his face between his palms to control the kiss. Eddie wrapped his arms around him , holding him close. 

"I need your fingers in me now." Buck panted as he pulled back from the kiss. 

Eddie could only nod. He let Buck lay back as he opened the packet of lube and lathered his index and middle finger. He set it back down and traced his rim with one finger as he held his hip with the other. His attention focused solely on his task. 

Slowly he breached the tight opening , eyes flicking up to Buck's to make sure he was alright. Finally he made it as far as his finger could go. Buck's fingers flexed restlessly as Eddie started to withdraw it , moving in small circles as he did.

"You ok?" Eddie asked.

"It's just been a while." 

Eddie continued to work his finger in and out. Feeling the muscles loosen he still waited for Buck to tell him. Buck nodded and Eddie added more lube before breaching him with two fingers. Once he worked them in fully enough times he started to spread them on the way out. 

"I'm ready." Buck whined after Eddie had worked three in easily. 

"Alright. Uh…" Eddie held up the condom in a silent question.

"I haven't gotten my test results back for this month yet." Buck told him.

"Test results?" Eddie thought he hadn't been with anyone since Abby.

"I always test up until a year to be safe. Some things can be missed and I don't like to take chances. Is that alright?"

"Of course! I'll just have something to look forward to." Eddie kissed him deeply. 

Then he ripped the condom open with his teeth , rolling it on. He lathered the rest of the lube on to his cock , ignoring the need to fuck into his hand. He lined up and slowly slid home , pausing whenever Buck hissed in discomfort. 

"Fuck Eddie." Buck moaned gripping at his back. 

"You ready?" Eddie asked , Buck nodded. 

Eddie withdrew till only the tip was in then slammed back in. Buck dug his fingernails in his back and whined. Eddie set a fast pace , standing up to get a better angle his hands on his hips to hold him in place. 

Buck gripped the blanket and arched his neck back and forth as Eddie hit his prostate nearly every time. Eddie felt his orgasm racing toward him. 

"Are you close?" He asked , gritting his teeth. 

"God , yes! Fuck me harder." Buck pleaded.

Eddie let go , fucking into Buck with abandon. He pulled him to him as his thrusts moved him up the tailgate. The thunder and lightning continued , rain drops began to fall as they writhed together chasing completion. 

"Holy shit , I'm gonna cum." Buck nearly shouted , his entire body strung tight. 

The pleasure was way more than he had ever had with Doug. His hands scrambled for purchase as the rain made their bodies slick. He kept his eyes on Eddie's face , forcing his eyes to stay open against the pleasure. 

"Fuck I'm there too. Buck! I'm cumming baby." Eddie shouted as he thrust erratically before stilling as he filled the condom. 

Buck felt his orgasm ripped out of him as he felt Eddie twitch inside him. There was a little heat that bled through the condom and it made Buck wish that there was no condom. He wanted to feel the cum coat his insides and leak out after. 

"God damn I think I died." Eddie panted as he leaned over Buck. 

"I'm with you on that one." Buck chuckled.

"I'm gonna move. You okay?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah." Buck let his legs fall down off Eddie's hips and let him ease out. 

"We just made love in the rain." Eddie smirked as he sat next to Buck. It was still coming down at a slow steady pace. 

"I liked it." Buck said as he carefully sat up.

"So did I." Eddie told him , leaning over to peck him on the cheek.

"Can you get me the napkins out the basket?" Buck asked. 

"Sure." Eddie went and dug out some napkins and brought them back to Buck. 

They clean up both slipping back into their wet clothes before cleaning up the back of the truck. They stow the wet blankets in the floorboard of the back seat and throw the napkins and condom out with the used packet of lube. 

"Ready to head home?" Eddie asks.

"I'll go anywhere with you." Buck tells him and they pull out of the secluded area , heading home. 

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They had made it back to the house and relieved Carla. Christopher was already asleep. They took a warm shower together and changed into warm pajamas. Eddie had the next day off and he planned to sleep in wrapped around Buck until Christopher came to wake them up. 

Unfortunately it hadn't gone that way. There was a city wide power outage and he was woken up by Bobby calling him in to work. They needed all hands on deck except for Buck , who hadn't been cleared for duty yet.

"I'll see you later , babe." Eddie kissed him goodbye and pecked Christopher on the head before he left. 

Chrostopher had been woken by the phone which had gone off shortly after dawn. He had come down the hall to see what all the ruckus was and Eddie had told him to crawl into bed with Buck and sleep some more. 

Now Eddie was working a neighborhood with gas leaks exploding from every man hole and house in the cul-de-sac. There was no power , communications between resources was slow and there was a child trapped in a burning house.

"Let me go in Cap." Eddie said. 

"We're spread thin. There's not enough water to extinguish the house and all the others too. You'd be in greater risk." Bobby explained. 

"I can shimmy up the drain pipe and get there and out fast." Eddie argued. 

"Alright , but if it gets out of control get out."

Eddie took off , scaling the side of the house and busting in the window. He disappeared inside as they tried to put out as much of the flames as possible before the water ran out. 

"That's it!" Bobby yelled as the water dropped in pressure. 

They stood watching for Eddie to emerge. The flames grew and Bobby got nervous. He heard a growing hum and looked around. He spotted one of the drop planes approaching. Someone was looking out for them. 

His phone rang and he rushed to answer it. 

"Hello?" 

"Cap I called in a favor. Got you some water coming." Chim said in a hurry. 

"Thanks." Bobby said and hung up.

"Incoming! Take cover under the trucks!" Bobby yelled pointing at the plane. 

"Grab her!" Eddie yelled as he finally emerged from the house. 

He waited until Hen was under her with Bobby and then Eddie dropped her over the edge of the roof. Once she was clear he hurried over himself. They ran to take cover under the fire engines. 

The water fell in heavy waves along the street. Once it was done and they crawled out from under the trucks most of the flames were out. The sound of sirens came up the street. 

"Well look at that." Bobby said. 

"Hey , someone named Buck said you needed help." The first one out the lead truck said. 

Eddie just shook his head. Off duty and still looking out for them.

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"Thanks for the extra help today. Between you and Chim we got that neighborhood saved." Eddie told Buck as he joined him on the couch. 

"Gotta keep my baby safe." Buck laughed. 

"Well , thanks." 

"So tomorrow I do my re evals and if I pass I'm back on the next shift." Buck told him as he handed him his plate. 

"That's great. So after evals are you going to talk to Bobby?" 

"Yeah. You said you wanted to tell them and that starts with Bobby." 

"I know just wanted to make sure I was there to talk to him with you." 

"Alright. I'll let you know when I find out if I passed." 

"So anything exciting I miss today between exploding mail and delivering babies?" Eddie said as they clicked on the tv. 

"Not really." Buck leaned back on the couch after Eddie put his plate on the table. 

_ "We have a crew on scene of an apparent package bomb. Sources say the man opened his mail as he was sitting in his car. The car was engulfed in flames before the man could be rescued. Earlier today a woman and a child were also injured in two seperate mail explosions. More on this story as it becomes available."  _ The ten o'clock news anchor announced. 

"How many did you say you had today?" Buck asked. 

"Just the woman. We didn't hear anything about the child. Those must have been outside our area." Eddie said. He didn't like this. 

"Talk to Cap and Athena about it tomorrow. Maybe they know something." Buck suggested.

"Yeah. Let's go to bed." 

"I doubt it's anything to worry about." Buck said as they lay in bed , drifting off to sleep.

 


	13. Chocolate and Answered Prayers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Character death. Might have gone off script a bit. Damn Hulu for taking season two down! We need them all! Enjoy and don't forget to COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT.

“Bobby can I talk to you?” Buck asked as he came into the station. 

“Of course. How did the evals go?” Bobby asked as he stood to walk with Buck somewhere more private. 

“They went great. I think I even topped some of my previous scores.” Buck said spotting Eddie and nodding to him to let him know that now was the time he was talking to Bobby. 

“Hey , I take it you passed.” Eddie said as he fell in step with them. 

“Yeah , he did , but he wants to talk about something so can you give us a minute?” Bobby told him. 

“This kind of concerns him to boss.” Buck told him and watched as Bobby looked between them in confusion. 

“Let’s go talk then.” Bobby pointed toward his office.

They walked into Bobby’s office , though it was rarely used unless there were higher ups in the house. They came in , Bobby closing the door behind them and went to sit at his desk. Buck and Eddie took seats in front and glanced at each other. 

“So what is this about , you’re not fighting again are you?” Bobby looked at them. 

“No , kind of the opposite really.” Buck laughed. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Well , what he means is...well…” Eddie started , tripping over the actual words. 

“This.” Buck said and reached for Eddie’s hand , interlacing their fingers. 

“Oh.” Bobby said looking dazed. 

“Is this a problem?” Buck asked tentatively. 

Bobby looked between them for a moment. Opening and closing his mouth , trying to find his words. He took a deep breath and folded his hands. They looked at each other nervously . Eddie squeezed Buck’s hand in comfort. 

“Inter-house relationships are frowned upon , but not outlawed. Are you two sure this is how you want to do this?” Bobby asked.

“We love each other. Not to say there won’t be times when we have trouble , but with what we do for a living. Cutting off parts of ourselves is what we are good at.” Eddie told him. 

“If you want to do this , do it. But the first time you let it get in the way of the job , I end it.” Bobby told them. 

“We won’t Cap. I swear!” Buck smiled. 

“I believe you. Now is there anything else or can we go celebrate your return?” 

"No , that was all Cap." 

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Buck was glad to be back. Being off work left him with way too much time on his hands.  Sure he loves being able to spend time with Christopher, but he missed being at work saving people. After Bobby left he went to put his stuff in the locker and then join Eddie and the rest of the crew around the table.

"So you ready to get back at it Buckaroo?" Hen asked as he joined them after changing.

"Yeah , I am. But first there's something we want to tell you." Buck replied. 

"We?" Chim questioned. 

Eddie stood and walked over to stand next to Buck at the end of the table. He looked at him and nodded. Without saying anything Buck reached over and grabbed Eddie's hand, interlacing their fingers together and turning to look at the others.

"Uhh.. " Chim looked between them at a loss.

"No freaking way!" Hen crowed at the two of them , clapping her hands in excitement. 

"Yes freaking way." Buck laughed at her.

"You we knew , but Eddie?" Chim said. 

"I'm bi-sexual. I was just with Shannon and Christopher. Things were set for me after she got pregnant , but now after she's been gone from his life. I just can't lie to myself anymore."

Buck squeezed Eddie's hand in support. Eddie looked up and locked eyes with Buck, telling him without words thanks for his support. The others look at each other, each wondering if this was a good thing or a bad thing. Then, almost as one, they all turn to look at Bobby.

"Don't look at me. I already gave them the safe relationship talk." Bobby said. 

Before anything else could be said the alarm went off , cutting the conversation short. They each raced to the trucks, throwing on their gear as they went. Buck felt his heart race enjoy at finally being back at work.

"We have someone in distress at the First National Bank." 

They rolled out the bays , narrowly missing their equipment repair guy. Buck sat across from Eddie , smiling at him every time their eyes met. It was exhilarating to be out , to not have to hide his relationship with Eddie. The others watched them in a daze. 

They made it to the bank , jumping out and meeting the woman who was waiting to take them to the victim. Apparently there had been a going away party for the bank manager. He had worked there for fifteen years and was finally leaving to live his life. He had one last thing to do before they closed and began the party. 

“So ma’am , what can you tell me about what happened here?” Bobby asked as they walked into the bank to the vault where the bank manager and a delivery man for the armored car was lying on the floor. 

“We were getting ready to have Franklin’s retirement party , we just had to get the delivery of money first then we could start. Franklin was getting the delivery dealt with and locked up. The delivery man came out and started foaming at the mouth then he collapsed.”

“Is there anyone else who’s sick?” Buck asked.

“No , just him and Franklin in the vault. He collapsed inside before he could get it dealt with.” 

“Cap , the symptoms would suggest some kind of nerve agent. I saw this type of thing in the corp.” 

“Alright , I’m going to call for Hazmat. Get the victims loaded , but everyone else has to stay here. You may have been exposed and will need to go through decontamination.” 

Bobby called it in , Buck and Chim got everyone together and ready for the hazmat decontamination showers once they were set up. Eddie went to check on the bank manager Franklin while Hen worked on the delivery guy from the armored car. 

Eddie goes into the vault and starts checking his vitals. Suddenly Franklin reached up and grabbed Eddie’s face , keeping him in a tight grip. Eddie felt something tingle.

“Sir , I’m here to help you but you need to let me check you out.” Eddie told him. 

A sound grabbed his attention , he looked up and locked eyes with Buck and Cap as the door rushed closed. He felt something bubble up his throat and fill his mouth. It ran down his chin and he felt his eyes start to roll back , his consciousness leave him. 

“Eddie!” Buck screamed as the door slammed shut. 

They had gotten the delivery guard loaded and went to check on Eddie and the bank manager. When they came in the room they saw Eddie crouched over the man who was holding his face and then the door was closing. Bobby ran behind the desk and found the security footage. Eddie began to foam at the mouth and fall over. 

“Cap , what do we do?” Buck asked as he watched the screen in horror. 

“We need to get them out , now.” 

“Hey , you bank lady! How do we get this vault open?” Buck turned and yelled out to the woman who met them at the door. 

“It’s on a timer. It’s not set to open until tomorrow morning.” she looked at them. 

“They may not have that long.” 

“I can try to have the company open it on their end , but that could take a while.” she suggested. 

“Do that. In the meantime I may have another option.” Bobby told her. 

They called the company , who took forever to even agree to try to open it remotely. Bobby had had enough and called Michael , since he was in architecture and might know some way to break into the vault. The other employees were cleared and taken away. 

Buck watched the monitor anytime that they weren’t trying to get in. He watched as Eddie lay there still as death and tried not to think about what would happen if they had to wait for the vault to open itself. He couldn’t lose Eddie now that he had him , Christopher couldn’t lose him either. 

“We just got word from the hospital. The delivery guy just died.” Hen quietly told Bobby as he and Chim were looking over some building blueprints. 

“We can’t wait any longer.” Bobby said.

They had a plan thanks to Michael they knew where to bust through the wall to get into the vault. It was crazy that they were breaking into a bank , but right now all Buck was worried about was getting Eddie out. They managed to bust in the same time the company sent the unlock signal and opened the damn door. 

“Well , they’ll have to move all this stuff somewhere else now there’s a giant hole in the vault.” Chim said. 

Buck didn’t stick around outside. He made a beeline in the bank to the vault to check on Eddie. They got in and got them to the hospital. The bank manager was hanging in there and Eddie was doing better. They were able to test the delivery guy and figure out what he died from. By the time Eddie and Franklin arrived they had an antidote to give them. 

“They say they’re going to be ok. There will be an inquiry to find out where the poison comes from and what the intent was.” Bobby tells them as they rode back to the house. 

When they pulled in and climbed from the trucks there were cops waiting for them. Buck looked at Chim , but he looked confused too. They all climbed down from the truck and walked behind Bobby , waiting for them to tell them why they were here. 

“Captain Nash. We have a problem.” one of them said coming forward. 

“What kind of problem Mr…?” 

“Seems like someone here left with more than they showed up at the bank.” he ignored the request for a name. 

“Like what exactly?” Buck asked incredulously. 

“Money. A lot of money is missing from the bank along with diamonds stolen from the vault. Now there was one of you at least that spent significant time in the vault.” 

“He nearly died and you think he had time to steal the money?!” Buck was getting pissed. 

“Our investigation will find the truth. But I highly suggest that you tell us the truth before we find it out. It’s better for you that way.” 

One of the guys walked over to the truck and popped one of the compartments on the truck open. He pulled the L.A.F.D. bag out and unzipped it. Without a word he turned and ripped it open , tossing it at their feet. Stacks and stacks of cash were stuffed inside.  

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Buck walked into the hospital room. Eddie was laid there on those white sheets sleeping. This was the first time that the roles were reversed. He had to sit here and watch Eddie be hurt , unable to do anything. He took a seat at his bedside. He had already called Carla to watch Christopher. 

“I got to say , I don’t like being on this end of situations like this.” Buck told him.

“Now you know how I feel.” Eddie croaked. 

“Shit , I thought you were asleep.” Buck said. 

“Nope. Who has Christopher?” Eddie asked sitting up. 

“I called Carla , she’d got him for a few. How are you feeling?” Buck helped him get comfortable. 

“Like shit. Did they figure out what happened?” 

“Somehow you were poisoned. They’re trying to find out who and why now. But there was another problem.” 

“What?” 

“There was money and diamonds taken from the vault. They think it was us.” 

“You mean me. I was the one in there for hours.” 

“I know that you didn’t do it. But they found the money in the truck , tucked in one of the bins. The diamonds are still missing though.” 

“This is the last thing I need. To be labeled a thief.” Eddie sighed. 

“They’re going to find out who really did this and planted the money on our truck. It’ll all work out babe.” Buck leaned up to give him a kiss.

“It better. Any word on when I can get out of here and back to work?” 

“I can answer that.” the doctor said as he walked in. 

Eddie is set to be released first thing in the morning as soon as the toxins clear his system. They’re still trying to narrow down exactly what was used , but he’s glad they have managed to save him from dying like the armored truck guy. Buck goes home , with a promise to pick him up first thing in the morning , to take care of Christopher. 

In the end Hen was the one who figured it all out. So a nice fuck you to the idiots who thought they were in on it. The bank manager had been found with the diamonds in his stomach and he had worked with the equipment repair guy from the station. It had been scorpion venom that he had used to create an emergency. 

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“So now that Hen solved your case for you and we’re not thieves , can we go back to work?” Buck snarked. 

“Yes , you will be put back in rotation and cleared to return to full duty. Well , except…” They turned and left them standing there. They were beyond confused. 

Except what?

“Hey , Cap any idea what those guys were talking about?” Chim asked as Bobby walked up front. 

“Yeah , when they thought one of us was a thief they dug in our lives , you know from the searches and the questioning. Well , they found something. I’m not going to be here for a few shifts. I have to work some things out with the bigwigs.” 

“What does that mean?” Buck asked. 

“It’s to do with my past. When I came here a friend got me the job and well , the details of my past were left out and the chief thinks that is lying on my resume. But while I’m gone I want Chim to lead you all. He’ll do a great job.” 

“What are you going to do?” 

“I have wedding plans to finish.” Bobby smiled. 

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Chim walked around the station with his shades on and acting like Bobby if Bobby was a total control freak on a power trip. As much as they love Chim , they all want Bobby back. 

"Things are going to be more efficient around here." Chim started to speak to them and Buck just locked eyes with Eddie and rolled his. 

“I stopped by and talked to Bobby , there’s still no word on when they’ll do his hearing. So he remains a wedding planner and we remain stuck with Captain Ahab here.” Buck whispered to Eddie. 

“Hey , no whispering while I’m going over the new house schedules.” Chim said coming to a stop in front of them. 

“Why are you changing things? Bobby will be back soon anyway.” Eddie pointed out. 

Before Chim could reply the alarm went off. They took off grabbing their gear and loading up. Eddie and Buck scooted together in the back as they raced down the street , siren blaring. Their sides pressed together and their hearts beating as one with excitement. 

“We have a call of a man who’s fallen and is stuck in a vat at the candy factory on 3rd and Vine.” Chim told them as they ran through redlights. 

“Does that make his name Willy?” Buck laughed.

“This isn’t a joke. Apparently he’s in serious danger.” Chim scolded him. 

Buck stopped laughing and ducked his head. He knew better than to make fun of a call. Bobby never would have put up with that. He felt guilt or anxiety at his screw up. He knew things were great with the team , but he didn’t need to screw it up.

“Hey , you okay?” Eddie nudged his side and whispered. 

“Yeah , just past stuff.” he answered. That had become their phrase when talking about his Doug issues. 

Eddie threaded his fingers through Buck’s and squeezed his hand in support. Eddie was always being supportive. He took the nightmares in stride , even when Buck insisted that he move into his own place before he hurt him or upset Christopher. He refused to let Buck feel upset or distance himself. 

“Let’s roll.” Chim said as they pulled to a stop outside the chocolate factory. 

“This way , he’s sinking.” a woman meet them in the parking lot. 

They followed her inside. There were vats of chocolate and liquid heated candy. All kinds of goodies in varying stages of being made. Buck loved sweets , though after the incident with the LSD he had been wary. The place smelled amazing. 

“Oh thank God. The children are in another room , I didn’t think it wise to keep them out here in case…” 

“We were doing a tour when one of the chaperones separated from the group. He was reaching in to get another sample and slipped. Tom used to be overweight , but he went on this great diet last year. Chocolate was always his weakness.” One of the other teachers told them. 

“How you doing Tom?” Chim asked as they reached the vat he had fallen in. 

“Please get me out of here! I don’t want to be the guy who died because he couldn’t stop eating chocolate.” he pleaded , slipping further into the liquid. 

“Eddie , Buck grab him before he goes under!” Hen yelled. 

“Got him.” Eddie said throwing the ladder across the vat and getting on one side. 

Buck came from the other side to help keep him from being sucke further in and his hand slipped on the ladder. For one heart stopping moment he thought he was going in too. Eddie reached out and caught him. 

“Be careful.” Eddie told him with a smile. 

“I’ll try.” Buck replied reaching down to grab the guy. 

“So know what Captain?” Eddie asked Chim.

“Can you pull him up?” 

Eddie and Buck positioned themselves laying flat on the ladder and each grabbed the arm they were holding with both hands. Together they nodded and started to pull. It was like trying to lift a semi. It wasn’t happening. At all. 

“It’s no use. The chocolate is molded to him. Any time we try to pull it’s just sucking him in further.”Eddie shook his head. 

“Let me think.” Chim said and took off. 

“What the hell?” Buck said as they watched Chim leave.

They were left there , Eddie and Buck gripping the man over a vat of chocolate. Hen trying to get the man’s vitals. And Chim , their leader had flown the coop. What a lovely mess this was. Hen handed Buck the blood pressure cuff to put on. Buck managed to get it around the arm he was holding. 

“Here get this in your mouth so that if you go under you can still breathe.” Hen said as she ripped the mask off the O2 and handed it to Buck to put in the guy’s mouth. 

Suddenly the guy slipped from Buck’s hands , the chocolate sucking him in. Buck scrambled to get ahold of him again. His arms dipping into the chocolate all the way up to the shoulders. Hen held onto his legs as Eddie tried to keep his one arm in his grip and make sure Buck wasn’t about to go in himself. 

“Out of the way!” Chim yelled as he ran up the walkway dragging a hanging vat with him. 

“What the hell is that?” Eddie said as he positioned it above the vat. 

“It’s cocoa butter. Tempers the chocolate and decreases the viscosity.” Chim told them as he flipped the lever to open and the cocoa drizzled into the chocolate.  

He nodded to them as it flowed from one vat to the next. Eddie started to pull the arm he had in his grasp as Buck managed to get the one that slipped from his grip. Together they were able to pull the man out of the vat and get him to safety. Buck and Eddie were covered in chocolate. Not that Buck minded , it was pretty good. 

“How do you know that?” Hen asked.

“I know things!” Chim said defensively. 

“But you called Bobby didn’t you?” she looked at him. 

“Well , a good Captain utilizes all his resources.” 

“You two need a shower when we get back.” Hen teased. 

“We can do that.” Eddie said as he looked at Buck. 

“Yeah.” he agreed catching the smoldering look in Eddie’s eyes. He had something in mind for sure. They got the guy loded and off to get checked out.

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 Once back at the station everyone headed for the kitchen while Eddie and Buck headed for the showers. Once in the room Eddie placed their clothes on the shelf and turned on the water. Buck started to go to his own shower when Eddie grabbed his hand. 

“I got a better idea.” he reached past him to the shower one more stall over and flipped it on , drawing the curtain closed. 

“Oh really.” Buck smiled at him.

Eddie checked the water in the stall he had chosen and deemed it ready. He started stripping. The bathroom was set up with the little stalls for showering complete with curtains for privacy. Eddie threw his clothes in the laundry and waited for Buck to get undressed. Once his clothes were put up he grabbed him by the hand and pulled him in the stall with him.

“So why is the other shower running?” he asked Eddie. 

“In case someone comes in. I don’t want to get in trouble , but you in chocolate.  _ Dios mio! _ ” Eddie pulled him close and instead of a kiss he brought Buck’s fingers up to his mouth and began to lick them clean of the chocolate. 

“Eddie..” Buck groaned. 

Eddie continued to lick and suckle his fingers until they were clean. Buck took Eddie’s hand as soon as he was done and returned the favor. The heat from the shower and their bodies making the chocolate smooth and melty. Buck licked a large bit off Eddie’s hand and dropped to his knees in the small stall. 

“Buck , shit!” Eddie put his hands in his hair to steady his head. 

Buck went straight down as far as he could , coating him in chocolate. He hummed at the taste of Eddie and the chocolate mixing. He bobbed slowly up and down , the chocolate thinning as he swallowed around Eddie. 

“I’m close baby.” Eddie warned , trying to keep quiet biting his lip. 

Buck just moaned around his cock in his mouth and sped up. Eddie gripped the wet strands of Buck’s hair and thrust as far into his mouth as he dared. Finally he felt his spine tingle and the pleasure explode forth from him. He nearly bit through his lip holding in the scream of pleasure as he came in Buck’s mouth. Buck groaned as swallowed every bit of it. 

“Buck , baby.” Eddie sighed as he helped him stand , reaching for him. 

“I’m good baby.” Buck told him , bringing him in for a salty/sweet kiss. 

“What do you mean?” Eddie looked at him in post-orgasm confusion. 

“I came when you did. Fuck the taste , you have to try it next time.” Buck smiled at him. 

“You think we’ll get another call at the chocolate factory?” Eddie asked as they started to wash the remaining chocolate off. 

“Nope , but the store sells pretty good chocolate too.” Buck smirked at him. 

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“You ever think of having more kids?”Buck asked him as they lay in bed that night.

“Sometimes. But this time it would be with a surrogate and I wouldn’t be putting the baby in there. Why?” 

“I always wanted kids , but after Doug. I couldn’t bring a child into that. Now though. I mean I love Christopher , but you got the whole experience you know. The being born and talking and all that jazz. I kind of want that too.” 

“I understand that. I wouldn’t mind giving Christopher a sibling.” Eddie told him seriously. 

“I’ve kind of been keeping in touch with Ali , the girl from the earthquake. She knew things with us weren’t just friends. She offered to be my new Abby for the others until I was ready to tell them. Maybe she would consider being our surrogate?” Buck suggested nervously. 

“I think that would be nice. If she will , it’ll be your child. I have Christopher , the world needs more Evan Buckley DNA in it.” Eddie smiled at him. 

“So we’re really talking about this , it seems so surreal to be talking babies.” Buck laughed. 

“I want to do things right this time. I want to have a family with someone I love and can spend forever with.” 

“Me too. But if you’re planning on proposing , my divorce still has to go through even though Doug’s dead.” Buck teased , missing the speculative look in Eddie’s eyes.

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“I see he’s still here. Are you two fucking yet?” Shannon said as she barged her way into the house when Eddie opened the door after Buck had left to go to the store. 

“What are you doing here Shannon?” Eddie demanded , Christopher was visiting with Hen and Karen , he loved playing with Denny. 

“I needed to talk to you , but I had to wait until you were both home and alone. Seems like he never leaves without you.” 

“We have nothing to talk about until you treat Buck with more respect.” Eddie glared at her. 

“Oh , I think we have plenty to talk about. I want at least fifty-fifty custody of Christopher. I’m his mother for God’s sake.” 

“Who hasn’t acted like it in years. Don’t come in here thinking you’re owed a damn thing.” 

“I have apologized for that and the effort I’m making now should grant me a chance to be his mother the right way. Whether you’re with him or not.” 

“You want any type of custody take me to court. Let a Judge decide if you’re deserving of a son.” 

“Fine we can do it that way. But there’s something else too.” 

“I don’t care what else you have to say , if it doesn’t concern our kid then it’s not my concern.” 

“Well , that’s just it. Our  _ kids. _ ” she said. 

“What the hell are you talking about?” Eddie looked at her in confusion. 

“I’m pregnant. That last date , you had a lot of wine one thing lead to another and boom I’m pregnant.” 

“I don’t believe you.” Eddie told her , thinking that she was completely nuts. 

“I figured you wouldn’t , but that night when you started coming on to me you said you wanted to remember it for the rest of our lives. So you taped it.” she said holding her phone out to him. 

He took the phone and stared at the screen in disbelief as it showed him and Shannon stripping. He pulled her onto his lap and she rode him , her moans gaining in volume. It was like a train wreck , he couldn’t look away. She finished in a loud annoying scream and he watched his body tense as his own orgasm hit him , pumping into her. 

“You’re sperm are determined to reproduce. One time both times and I’m pregnant.” she said as the video began repeating , Eddie was too frozen to stop it. 

“What the fuck did she just say?” Buck said as he came in the room , neither having heard him return. 

“Oh dear , this is a mess. Maybe I should let you two talk.” Shannon said grabbing her phone and walking to the door. 

“Eddie?” Buck asked. 

“She...she’s pregnant. I…” Eddie tried , but he couldn’t get it together. 

“When... when did you...how.” Buck felt the tears filling his eyes. He wanted to think that things were ok , but how could she be pregnant with Eddie’s baby unless he had wanted it. 

“The last date. She said I got wasted and we had sex. There is a video , but I...I don’t remember that. Baby I swear I wouldn’t have been with her again. I don’t understand what’s going on.” Eddie began to sob , begging Buck to understand. 

“I want to believe you , but she has video. How would that have happened?” 

“I don’t know! I remember going there and drinking , but then my head was kind of fuzzy and I don’t remember much after that. I swear I wouldn’t have done this!” Eddie grabbed his head as he sobbed. 

“I believe you. But what do we do now?” Buck asked. 

“I don’t know. I really don’t know. God I want this to be a nightmare that I wake up from. How can you even look at me?” Eddie pushed himself away from Buck and curled in on himself. 

He had never felt so violated in all his life. He felt raw and exposed and disgusting. He wanted to scrub every inch of his skin until he felt normal again. Like he was clean. He was sure that he was raped somehow. She had used something to make him have sex with her , but without tox screens to back up his story it was his word against hers. 

And it didn’t look like he was unwilling in the video , the way he gripped her hips and moaned as she rode him. He felt bile coming up his throat and he ran for the bathroom. Barely leaning over the toilet in time to empty the contents of his stomach into it. He felt Buck rub his back in comfort. 

“Please , how can you touch me after…” Eddie cried vomiting some more.

“She did something to force you. This reaction is proof.” 

“Still , I cheated on you. Forced or not , that’s a violation of our relationship.” 

“I don’t care , you’re not pushing me away. Should we try to go after her for rape?” Buck asked.

“No , the evidence is long gone. Plus the baby. God a baby. I wish this wasn’t happening like this.” Eddie groaned. 

“I know , me either , but I’m here for you no matter what.” 

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“We have a pedestrian versus car on the corner of tenth and Connor street.”  

“Ok , Hen you and Eddie check the driver , Buck you and I take the pedestrian.” Chim said as they arrived. 

They jumped out and headed to their victims. Eddie had spent all of the time he laid awake last night praying for something to change. He didn’t want to do this again , not with Shannon. He wanted a kid with Buck. He wanted it to be just the three of them. 

“I didn’t see her , is she alright?” the victim asked as they reached her. 

“The others are working on her right now. How are you?” Eddie asked her , checking her over. 

“My neck hurts , but I’m worried about the woman.” she cried. 

“Oh God.” Eddie heard Buck say and something inside him twisted. 

He nodded to Hen and made his way over to Buck. As he got closer the body looked familiar. He knew in that moment that he knew her and he felt immense guilt because he had prayed for this had he not. He had laid there praying for her to be gone from their lives and God had answered. 

“Eddie , no.” Buck said standing and holding him in place. 

“That’s Shannon.” Eddie said stupidly. 

“I know , Chim’s working on her.” Buck said. 

“The baby.” Eddie whispered and even though Chim heard he didn’t say a word. 

Hen came to join after the other ambulance took the driver away. She hopped right in helping Chim while Buck held Eddie. They got her stable and loaded in the ambulance , Eddie jumping in too. The ride to the hospital feeling like forever. 

“I should have looked better before crossing , but I was thinking about the baby , daydreaming.” Shannon tells Eddie. 

“It’s alright. You’re going to be fine.” Eddie says , not knowing if it was true or not.

They make it to the hospital and they whisk her in the back. Eddie stands there staring at the doors. Finally arms wrap around him and pull him to a seat. He sits without complaint. He says nothing , the guilt eating away at him and prays that this is not how she leaves his life , not because he prayed for it. He can’t handle the responsibility of her death on his soul. 

“Family for Shannon Diaz.” the doctor calls and Eddie sees that Bobby has shown up at some point. 

“Here.” he says. 

“We tried everything we could , but there was extensive damage…” Eddie crumbles to the ground , Buck catching him and easing him down. 

He sits there , sobbing for a woman that he didn’t love because of the guilt he feels. In the arms of the man he loves no less. He’s going to hell. He knows that for sure now. He has to tell his son , who just got his mother back , that she was dead. 

He has little memory of the events of the day. He comes to at some point in his bed with no idea how he got there. He sits up and hears quiet voices from the living room. He walks slowly out toward the living room. 

“Do you know what that means Christopher , that she died?” Buck asks. 

“Yes , she had to go away to heaven and not come back.” 

“Yeah , that’s right. I know you wanted your family back together for Christmas.” Buck starts. 

“I have my family , the one I asked for.” Christopher cuts him off. 

“What do you mean?” Buck asked. 

“I asked Santa to give me you , me and daddy. He did.”

“That’s...Christopher I..I love you buddy.” Buck says , stunned by Christopher’s declaration. 

“Hey , guys.” Eddie says. 

“Daddy.” 

“Hey my little man.”

“Buck told me about Mommy. He said that sometimes people have to leave , but that she loves me.” 

“She does Christopher very much. And so do I.” Eddie hugs him tight , looking at Buck over his shoulder. 

_ Thank you _ he mouths. 

“Let’s watch some T.V.” Buck suggests. 

They turn on the T.V. and the news pops up. Eddie sits on the couch , a blanket on his lap and Christopher on one side. Buck takes the other side , snuggling up to him and kissing him softly. Eddie soaks in the love of his men and feels some of the guilt float away. 

_ “Another mail bomb explodes tonight putting the city on edge as the victim fights for his life tonight. This is the third package in the past few days and it has many wondering what the reasoning is behind these attacks if there is one at all.”  _

“More mail bombs?” Eddie asks Buck. Buck can only look at him , this is worse than they thought.  


	14. Endings and Beginnings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last part of this story. Until part two of course , but that will be slow going since the season is in progress. I hope you enjoy it. I enjoyed writing it. So much so that I intend to change and publish it as my second novel. BUT worry not , this will stay up. Here we go folks.

“Listen up. We all know what the news is saying. They have confirmed that we have a serial bomber. There have been four explosions to date. We need to be on the lookout for more. It’s going to be busy until the person responsible is caught.” Chim said as they had their morning meeting before shift.

“Any leads yet Cap?” Eddie asked. 

“No , they have no idea what the person is after and no connection has been found between the victims yet.” 

“So what do they want us to do?” Buck asked him , standing beside Eddie. 

“We do our jobs , same as always. If we get any bomb calls we work them and help the police in any way they need.” 

He nodded to them and walked off. The others wandered off to do whatever they had to do. Eddie and Buck walked off toward the gym area. They began their usual workout routine. They ran on the treadmill to warm up then they hit the bag , one holding the other punching then switching. Finally they did a little weightlifting. 

“So who do you think is behind the bombings , disgraced postal worker or pissed off psycho ex-girlfriend?” Buck asked. 

“How does ex-girlfriend seem likely?” 

“Well , maybe the boyfriend left her for another girl or he knocked her…” Buck trailed off uncertainly. 

“It’s alright Buck. We can talk about it without me having a fit. The doctor said the autopsy report would be back in a few days. I’ll know then.” Eddie sighed. 

Buck had been walking on eggshells about the pregnancy since Shannon died two weeks before. Eddie didn’t blame him , he had gone a little emotional a few times. He had explained to the doctor when he had gone for the pre-funeral stuff that she had told him she was pregnant. There was no need to mention to anyone that she had most likely roofied him and raped him to become so. 

“I know , it’s just I don’t want to be insensitive is all.” Buck said. 

“And I love you for it , but you can say pregnant and baby. We can even talk about having a baby like we were.” 

“I have been thinking about that.” Buck ducked his head.

“And what has been in that pretty head of yours?” Eddie reached out and lifted his head to look at him. 

“I know you want another kid and I want a kid too , but how would this work?” 

“Which part?” 

“The part where we both work , at the same time and the same dangerous job. We would either have to give up our job or have a child who thinks that the babysitter is it’s parents. That doesn’t seem right to me. Like people who get dogs and they spend their lives in a cage or chained up because they don’t have the time to deal with them.” 

“I didn’t think of that.” 

“I’m sorry if I’m ruining our dream. I just want to do right by the kid.” 

“I get it , Buck and you haven’t ruined anything. You are making sure our future child is getting the attention and love they need. That’s being a parent.” 

“Yeah.” 

“I’m serious. We are going to do this right or not at all.” 

Buck smiled at Eddie and leaned in to give him a peck on the cheek. When he pulled back Eddie stopped him with a hand to the back of his head. He pulled him into a slow languid kiss. Their tongues sliding along each other and Buck moaned. 

“You know better than to start stuff at work.” he told Eddie. 

“I know. But the moment we get home and Christopher is in bed we’re finishing this.” Eddie licked his nose to break the moment. 

“Ewww.” Buck squealed and wiped at his nose. 

“You are so cute sometimes.” Eddie just shook his head and headed for the showers. 

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They hadn’t had anymore encounters at the station since the chocolate incident. That had been mind blowing , but they were sure that Bobby wouldn’t be happy if he caught them. Even if he wasn't reinstated yet. 

Suddenly the alarm went off. Everyone scrambled to get in the truck. They had a suspicious package at an elementary school. Thankfully far from Christopher's school. 

"Bomb squad is joining us we are to evac the students. We'll line the trucks up as a blast shield , tuck the kids up next to it." Chim told them. 

They rolled up at the school parking across the courts in the back. The bomb squad quickly set up as they got all the kids tucked in behind the trucks. 

"Squeeze tight against the trucks kids." Buck said as he helped a few kids get closer. 

"I'm scared." A little blonde girl said , her hair in pigtails. 

"It's going to be just fine sweetie." Buck said kneeling down to talk to her. 

Eddie watched with a soft smile. Buck was so naturally good with kids. He had taken to Christopher with no problems , most were either afraid of him or treated him like glass. He hated both. Eddie could see Buck with a daughter just like this little girl , with his eyes and blond curls. She would be his baby, of course , the angel of his eye. His heart ached to see it. 

The bomb squad sent a tech suited to the nines out to inspect the bookbag. They talked it over and decided to blow the whole thing. He placed the charge then retreated. Buck and the others formed a line behind the last of the kids just in case some debris flew over the trucks. Buck felt a tiny hand slip into his and looked down to find the little girl. He smiled at her and squeezed her hand. 

“Fire in the hole! Fire in the hole! Fire in the hole!” they called out and detonated the bag. 

Once it was all clear they moved to the spaces between the trucks to watch the bomb tech evaluate the now blown open bag. He walked toward the mess splattered on the light pole. They waited with baited breath for him to speak. Buck still clutching the tiny hand in his. 

“It appears to be some kind of grey paste. I’m not sure what the substance is.” he called out. 

“It’s tuna fish.” a small voice said. 

“Was that your lunch Kara?” a teacher asked the small girl clutching Buck’s hand. 

“Yeah.” she whispered. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” 

“I hate tuna fish. Am I going to jail?” she said , tears forming in her eyes. 

“No , sweetie. I don’t like tuna either.” Buck reassured her. 

Eddie shook his head at Buck. He made friends everywhere. And damn if he didn’t make Eddie fall for him more and more. 

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Eddie climbed from the truck and headed for the showers. He had a little more than an hour and a half to get dressed and head to the church. Buck was coming with of course , but he was nervous. This would be his first time meeting Eddie’s other family members who had flown in and Shannon’s family. At her funeral as his boyfriend and he was feeling guilty. 

“I’ll be ready in ten minutes and we’ll head to the house to get dressed and pick up Christopher.” Eddie told Buck as he came in the bathroom. 

“I can be done in time.” Buck said starting his own shower. 

They showered and dressed in street clothes. They headed out , nodding to the others as they passed. They were off for the funeral , but Buck wasn’t sure about going to the wake. He wanted to see how everyone reacted at the funeral before he caused a scene at Eddie’s Abuela’s house. The woman liked him , he didn’t want to fuck that up. 

“Christopher are you ready bud?” Eddie asked as they came in. 

“Yes , daddy. Carla helped me get dressed nice for Momma.” Eddie choked back the emotion rising at the sound of his son , so brave. 

“Let me and Buck get dressed nice and we’ll be ready to go.” 

He and Buck went to their room and put on the tuxes that Carla had picked up for them. Eddie swore that woman was sent from heaven for all that she did for him. Another thing to love Buck for. He watched as Buck untied and tried to retie his tie. He was getting flustered.

“Hey , having a little trouble?” Eddie asked when he was done and Buck was on his fourth attempt. 

“I can’t get it right.” Buck whined. 

“I can help you with that. Although I think it was good three tries ago. What are you so worked up about?” Eddie asked as he came up behind him and tied his tie easily. 

“I want your family to like me. I don’t want to cause problems , especially at the funeral. I mean , the new boyfriend at the wife’s funeral. That’s a little bold.” 

“It will be fine. My parents have always had some issues with me liking men so that will be a point , but I doubt they will cause a scene at a funeral. As for her parents , they knew that we were over. I owe them no explanation.” 

“I just don’t want to be a problem.” 

“You could never be a problem. Christopher and I want you to be there. That’s all that matters.” 

“I hope so.” Buck whispered. 

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They pulled up to the church. Buck was still nervous , but he trusted Eddie. They climbed out of Eddie’s truck and helped Christopher out. Standing outside the church were a man and a woman who had to be Eddie’s parents. Buck gulped and followed after Eddie and Christopher. 

“Eddie. Look how big he’s gotten. Hello Christopher.” the woman said as they neared. 

“Hi.” Christopher said. 

“And who is this?” Eddie’s father said in a tight voice. 

“This is Buck. We work together and live together.” Eddie said , looking defiantly at his father. 

“At your wife’s funeral? Is there no end to the shame?” he sneered.

“We were not together father. Hadn’t been since...either way, this is my life now and has been since before she came here.” 

“What will her parents think when you bring a date?” 

“I don’t care. I’m paying my respects to her and damn anyone else.” Eddie growled out. 

They walked the rest of the way up the steps into the church. Buck had been quiet , fighting the instinct to flee from the conflict. But Eddie was here and Christopher was smiling at him. So he walked into the church trusting them. 

The funeral ran as smooth as he could have hoped. Shannon’s parents had been surprised , but they understood. Knew that their daughter hadn’t been perfect and hadn’t expected Eddie to spend his life waiting for her to come back. They loved Christopher still so there was no reason to alienate them by being rude to Buck. 

His parents hadn’t gotten the memo. They still were upset that he had brought Buck and that he was dating him. After they all headed to Eddie's abuela's for food and family. Buck wasn't sure if he should come , but Eddie wanted him there. 

"I want you with me. Christopher wants you with us. My parents were never going to be happy." 

"You're our family too Bucky." Christopher said from the backseat. 

They pulled up at his Abuelo’s house and climbed out , Buck helping Christopher. Together they walked up to the door. She greeted them with a smile as always. She liked Buck , hadn’t told him but the extra food she sent over and the smiles she gave him when he came with Eddie to pick up Christopher said enough. 

“I’m glad you came Buck.” she smiled at him. 

“Of course. Can’t let these two go alone.” Buck said. 

“Good boy. Now come in and get some food. You look too thin.” she pulled him inside. 

Buck followed where she dragged him. He wasn’t worried about being with her. Eddie and Christopher made their way to the back yard and got him seated. Buck made him and Eddie a plate , he knew that he would be busy making Christopher a plate. His Abuela smiled as she watched him make Eddie a plate. 

“So you have gone back to your sinful ways.” his father said as he left Christopher at the table with some of his cousins. 

“Look pop , I know you don’t like it or approve of it , but it’s my life. I have to live it. I tried with Shannon , but it didn’t work out.” he told them. 

“Maybe because you didn’t want it to work out. You wanted to get back to your disgusting ways.” 

“Seriously , you’re going to do this here and now. With everyone to hear it. Including your grandson.” Eddie nodded towards Christopher who was laughing at something his cousin had said. 

“I can’t change my beliefs.” 

“And I can’t change who I am.” 

His father walked off in a huff and Eddie took a deep breath to calm down. He was so pissed that his father just couldn’t accept him. He grabbed the plate and finished making Christopher something to eat. He walked over and gave him the plate and went to an empty table to stake a claim on a seat. 

“Here Eddie.” Buck said as he sat the plate down in front of him. 

“You made me food?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah , I knew you’d make Christopher’s and not worry about you. So I made yours with mine. Are you ok , I saw you talking to your dad?” 

“Yeah , same old shit. He can’t accept that I don’t only like women. They don’t live here so I don’t have to worry about what they think all the time.” 

“So , Eddie , Buck , tell us how you met.” Shannon’s mom said as her and her husband took a seat at their table. 

“Well , there he was coming into the fire station and I was changing. He of course was all worried that I’d take his friends or something…” Eddie began. They talked for a while , Shannon’s parents putting Buck at ease. At least until Eddie’s came back for another round. 

“Listen , we wanted to talk to about something.” Eddie’s mom interrupted. 

“Ok , have a seat and we can talk.” Eddie said. 

“We’re going to go talk to Christopher.” Shannon’s mother said and they got up to give his parents some place to sit. 

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” Julio sneered at Buck. 

“I have nowhere else to be than where he needs me , if that’s not here at the moment he’ll tell me. “ Buck replied tightly. 

“Fine. We wanted to talk to you about moving back to Texas. We never see our grandson and he could do so much better than here where you have to leave him with strangers while you work. Back in Texas there is plenty of family to watch him.” 

“First of all he does have family here. This is the home of one of them and you disrespect her by ignoring her presence. There is also the family that we have made , the people at the firehouse and their family. As for strangers , you practically are strangers to him. You didn’t want to visit.” 

“But this woman you leave him with. The others told me she cares for him most of the time.” 

“Her name is Carla and she loves him like her own. Either way it’s my life , he’s my son and I’ll decide how to raise him.”

“But we want to see him too.” 

“Then come every once in a while to see him. Maybe once a year we can come out there. But it will be the three of us.” Eddie warned. 

“I don’t understand why you must live like this , Edmundo.” 

“Because this is who I am. Who I have always been.” Eddie sighed tiredly. 

“We can work on accepting it.” Luciana said , patting her husband's arm. 

“Good cause it’s not changing.” 

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_ ‘Bomb mailed to Athena’s house. Be on the lookout.’  _ Buck read the text that Bobby sent out. 

“Eddie , look what Bobby sent.” he handed the phone over to him. 

“What the hell man?! Who is this fucker?” Eddie swore under his breath. 

“I don’t know , but if he sends one here , I’ll kill them myself.” 

“You and me both.” Eddie growled. 

“Chris baby , it’s time for us to go back to work. You’re going to stay with Abuela and your cousins tonight and tomorrow ok.” Eddie told him as they got ready to head back in for the rest of their shift. 

“I know daddy. I love you and Buck.” 

“Love you too , little man.” Buck kissed his head as he went to start the car. 

Christopher went back to playing with his cousins , a good game of uno going. Eddie watched for a few seconds before going to find his Abuela. He hugged Shannon’s parents goodbye as he passed them. When he found her she was talking to his aunt.

“Eddie , I’m sorry about your father. He should never have talked to you that way.” 

“It’s ok. Nothing new or unexpected. But that’s not what I want to talk to you about. There’s the mail bombs , you heard about those on the news. What we just learned is one was sent to Athena , Captain Nash’s girl. I want you to be careful of any packages , whether you think you know what it is or not.” 

“I understand. Do you think this person is after you too or could it have been just her?”

“They don’t know.” 

“Be careful , mijo. You and Buck.” 

“We will.” Eddie hugged her and joined Buck in the truck. 

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“So what did we miss?” Buck asked as they returned to work. 

“Well there was a stunt driver who got his hair stuck in his own car engine.” Chim said. 

“Really , how the hell did that happen?” Eddie winced. 

“Well , his wife was starting the car as he worked on it and they were fighting. He leaned over too far and the fan got it. Nearly ripped his scalp completely off.” 

“That had to suck.” 

The alarm going off cut off any further conversation. They made their way to the trucks. Buck tried to picture someone’s hair being caught in a fan. It had to be gruesome as hell. He shivered at the thought. 

“We got a woman down in her apartment.” Cap said as they rolled out. 

“When does Bobby get an answer about returning to work?” 

“No idea , they haven’t said.” Chim answered. 

They pulled up to the address and crawled out. Eddie right behind Buck as they made their way up to the apartment. The door was unlocked and they were able to go right in. She was laid out on the floor in front of her phone , her arm tucked under her. 

“We’re here ma’am , can you tell us what happened?” Chim asked her. 

“I was doing this vid about popping zits when a huge worm came out of it. I freaked and over I went. I think my arm’s broken.” 

“A worm , you mean a maggot?” Hen asked. 

“Eww don’t say maggot. It was on the desk.” 

“Found it. It’s not a worm or a maggot. It’s a bot fly larvae. You been out of the country recently?” 

“No , just to the Maldives for work.” 

“That’s not in the country.” Eddie said , shaking his head at the stupidity. 

“Well , get you to the hospital and make sure they get all of them out.” 

“What do you mean all?!”

“There’s usually more than one.” Hen told her. 

“Buck , Eddie can you grab all the gear while we get her out.” Chim said as they wheeled her out of the apartment. 

“So , your parents really thought that you were going to leave here and move back with them?” Buck asked. 

“Yeah , I never understood them. I can’t hide who I am. Right now I’m so damn happy that you and I are out to our family and friends.” Eddie smiled at him.

“You and me both. I can kiss you anytime I want now.” Buck smirked.

He dropped the bags and reached out to grab Eddie by the shirt and pulled him close. He smiled as he rubbed his nose against Eddie’s making him laugh softly. Then he closed the distance and slipped his tongue into Eddie’s mouth , moaning at the warmth of him. He pulled him close against him by the hips and Eddie moaned. 

“We have hours of shift left.” Eddie groaned as he pulled back. 

“Hey , loverboys.” Hen called up the stairs. 

“We’re coming.” Eddie called , grabbing the bags. 

“Grab her phone too.” she called. 

Buck reached over and plucked it off it’s stand , never looking at it. He was too focused on watching Eddie as he grabbed the duffel and walked out first. He never saw the blogger’s live stream feed was still going or that the two of them had just exploded into viral popularity. 

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Half-way through shift they got a lead. Some old case that Athena and Bobby had worked together , a restaurant fire that was set by the owner for the insurance. He hadn’t known his son was still inside , but Bobby had realized that he had set the fire because they were drowning in debt. He had to report the arson , no matter how much he felt sorry for the family. 

“I have to head to the station with Athena. We’re going to catch this guy , but in the meantime watch out.” Bobby ended the call to the Chim. 

“So they think it has something to do with Bobby?” Eddie asked. 

“Yeah , some old arson case. They’re checking his house now. Also I got a text from Maddie. There’s something you should see.” he handed over his cell. 

There was the video of the blogger , specifically Eddie and Buck making out. The comments were amazing. Things like ‘these two are so damn hot’ ‘they make the cutest couple’ and ‘I wish I was that brave.’ Eddie looked up at Buck. 

“I didn’t know it was still on.” Buck said. 

“Me either , but I don’t mind the world knowing that you’re all mine.” 

“I don’t either. What about the higher ups , fraternization?” Buck asked Chim.

“I think at the moment they have other things to worry about. But I’m sure there will be some kind of discussion later.” the alarm bells rang out. 

“Let’s load up , this is a big one. Both trucks , Buck you lead the others.” Chim said pointing to the other truck. 

“See you there.” Buck winked at Eddie. 

They rolled out , Chim , Eddie and Hen in the first truck. Buck leading the others in the second truck. It was a lot of temp guys working the shifts because of the bombings. They wanted more man power in case of a big event. Buck didn’t really know them very well. 

The trucks left out the bay doors , and to the left. They took the nearly deserted streets to the call. Buck felt high on life. He had the best boyfriend , an amazing little boy in his life and he was out to his friends and the world apparently. It was the best his life had been since he met Doug. He was finally living the dream he had always wanted too. He wanted forever with Eddie and Christopher and maybe in the future another child. 

_ “118 we have an urgent message from Captain Nash.” _

“Repeat that command.” Chim said. 

_ “There’s an urgent message from Captain Nash. He thinks there may be a bomb in the fire house. You have to return to the station immediately.”  _

“Oh God.” Eddie said and craned his neck to see Buck’s truck behind them as it made the turn. 

Suddenly a fireball burst forth from beneath the truck , that combined with the turn causing the truck to flip. Eddie knew that Buck had been in the front passenger’s seat. The truck slid a few feet and stopped. Eddie knew he must have yelled , but he had no idea what he said. 

“STOP!” Chim yelled. 

Their truck came to a screeching halt and they all jumped out. Eddie ran straight toward the other truck , desperate to find Buck. He had to be alright , there was no other choice. He couldn’t lose him now , not after he might have lost a baby. Chim caught him and grabbed him before he could make it to the truck. 

“Look!” Chim pointed out. 

There was a man walking toward the truck , something in his hand.

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_ “You have to return to the station immediately.”  _

Buck turned to the guy driving. Who the hell puts a bomb in a fire station? They started to make the turn to head back to the station when there was a flash of light and a loud whoosh sound. Then everything went dark. 

Buck fluttered his eyes , fighting to open them. They felt heavy , like weights were attached to them. He felt like he had been beaten within an inch of his life. He hurt all over and had no idea what had made him that way. He remembered that they had been in the fire truck , turning back because of...of what. He managed to get his eyes open.

There was smoke and flames , glass everywhere. He could see bodies in the haze. He tried even though he felt like death to get up and help them. He tried to pull himself up to his knees , but something was wrong with his leg. He heard footsteps crunching on the glass and turned toward the sound.

“You’re new. It wasn’t supposed to be you , it was supposed to be Nash.” a young man said as he walked up to Buck. 

“Wha…?” Buck croaked out. 

The kid just looked out at the others from the other truck Buck guessed. He took the time to look at his situation. He lifted his hand to his head , hissing when he touched his forehead and it left his fingers red with blood. He twisted on his side to look at his foot. 

“Uhhh.” Buck whimpered as he saw it , trapped beneath the side of the fire truck. 

What scared him the most was that he couldn’t really feel it.

“I want Nash now!” the kid yelled. 

Buck looked and saw Eddie at the back corner of the other truck and he saw worry in his eyes. 

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“He’s strapped with another bomb.” Eddie said as he looked at the guy who had blown their truck up. 

Eddie looked at Buck again. He looked like he was out of it , he hadn’t moved much. Eddie looked at every inch of him that he could see and saw that his leg seemed to disappear beneath the truck. He was worried. 

“I want Nash now!” the kid yelled out. 

“We have to get him out of there.” Eddie said. 

“I’m the Captain , can I do anything for you?” Chim said as he walked out toward the kid.

“Yeah , get me Bobby Nash before I kill us all.” 

“Ok , he’s being contacted. Until then talk to me.” 

“I want him , I don’t care to talk to you.” 

“Can I at least get these people some help?” Chim asked as he pointed toward the others on the ground. 

“No , I want him to suffer like he made me suffer.” 

“But he wasn’t even here when that happened to you. Should he pay for that? He has a sister , a boyfriend and a stepson. Just let him go.” 

“No. Nash is going to lose his family just like I lost mine.” 

“I’m sorry that you lost your father. Your mother told me what happened.” Bobby said as he walked up. 

“You weren’t sorry when you told them that my dad set that fire.” 

“He knew what he was risking. I’m sorry that he died , but he doesn’t deserve to die too.” Bobby said pointing at Buck. 

“You care for him so that makes him perfect to make you suffer.” 

Eddie had watched as Bobby came from the other side to talk with the kid. He crept toward them as Bobby kept him distracted. He looked at what he could see of the bomb as he walked toward them. It had a dead man’s switch so that was the first priority. He finally was right behind the kid and nodded to Bobby. 

He threw himself at the kid , Bobby helping grab the switch so he couldn’t blow them all away. Once Bobby grabbed the switch from him Eddie punched the kid , not usually one for violence but he had threatened Buck. 

“Eddie , stop Buck needs you.” Bobby said as he grabbed his arm. 

"Buck. How are you doing baby?" Eddie asked dropping to his knees next to him as they took the kid away. 

"I can't really feel my leg. I'm scared Eddie." Buck looked at him , tears forming in his eyes.

"We're going to get you out of here." 

"Ok , let's get this truck off him!" Chim waved over the other officers and firemen. 

Together they lined up and grabbed the corner of the truck. Eddie stayed crouched next to Buck ready to pull him from the truck as soon as it was high enough. Buck squeezed his hands until they hurt , but Eddie didn't say a word. Being what he needed.

"On three! One , two , three!" Chim yelled out. 

They all lifted together. The truck barely moved as they strained to lift enough to get Buck out. Eddie gritted his teeth as Buck's grip tightened impossibly. 

"AHHHHHHHH!! Stop please!" Buck cried out as he felt like the bones were grinding together. 

"We can't lift it enough. We need more help." Chim grabbed for his radio. 

"Please no more. I swear I'll do anything , just make it stop!" Buck sobbed , giant hyperventilating sobs of agony.

"I'm so sorry baby. We have to get you out." Eddie cried as he caressed his head , tears streaming down his face.

"Dispatch we need…" Chim trailed off. 

The crowd that had gathered when the truck went over and stayed through it all was moving. The metal rails that they had put up to keep the crowd back was pushed out of the way. The throng of onlookers rushing through the opening to get to the overturned truck and Buck. 

"Alright then. Let's do this. Grab anywhere you can reach." Chim said directing the hundred or so people who ran to help. 

"They're trying again baby , hold on." Eddie told him and braced himself for Buck's agonized screams.

"One , two , three!!" Chim yelled again. 

This time the truck lifted nearly two feet off the ground. Buck felt his vision go small and the sound dim. He wondered if he'd pass out as the pain became even worse. He felt Eddie drag him from under the truck , the glass and asphalt scraping against his battered skin. 

"He's clear!" Eddie yelled.

"God , Eddie it hurts so bad! Please make it stop!" Buck wailed. 

"We're gonna get you some morphine and get you to the hospital. But baby we can't give you too much with your head." Eddie told him as they got him on the gurney and wheeled him to the ambo.

"I know. I...if something happens...I love you ok." Buck stuttered out.

"Nothing's going to happen baby , but I love you too. So damn much." Eddie kissed him as they stopped at the back doors to the ambo. 

As they loaded him into the ambo the crowd clapped , starting slow and gaining in intensity. Eddie turned to look at all of them , men , women and children. All of them clapping , for themselves , for Buck. He felt his heart swell with pride for his city , for the home he had found. He nodded and climbed in after Buck. 

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Once at the hospital it didn’t matter if he was a firefighter or his boyfriend , they weren’t letting Eddie back with Buck. No matter how hard he pleaded , he was stuck in the waiting room with everyone else. A dr came out briefly , telling them that they had to do surgery , but that had been hours ago. Eddie was on edge.

“Family for Evan Buckley?” A different doctor came out.

“Here.” Eddie jumped up first , ignoring Maddie and the fact that she was his sister. 

“Okay , well he came through the surgery and we were able to save the leg. It’ll need intensive rehabbing , but he will have use of it again.” 

“What about returning to being a firefighter , is it possible?” 

“It can be. With the right rest and rehab , it can get back to normal enough to be reinstated. Time will tell and it’ll take a lot of it.” 

“Thank you doc.” Maddie said. 

“Have a good night.” he left , off to the next great save. 

“He’s not going to like this , not at all.” Eddie said with a sigh.

“Well , tough shit. He needs to suck it up or he won’t have a chance. You can’t let him go to hard. He’ll fuck himself up and then he’ll spiral. He was like that as a kid , before Doug. I can assume it’s only gotten worse.” Maddie looked at him seriously. 

“I get it. I promise I won’t let him mess up.” Eddie nodded at her. 

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“Mr. Diaz , a word.” the coroner said as Eddie made his way down the hall to Buck’s room. 

“Yeah , I have a minute.” Eddie swallowed against the lump in his throat. 

He was sure there was only one thing he wanted to talk about with him. He had thought he was ready to know , when she was lying in this very hospital , growing cold , he thought he wanted to know. But now here , in this hallway , he wasn’t so sure. He wanted Buck to be with him when he learned the truth , but he was still out of it. 

“I got the results back from that particular aspect you were asking about.” 

“Ok.” 

“The results were negative. There was no pregnancy. Hadn’t been for two years at least.” 

“Wait , two years? You mean she was pregnant two years ago?” Eddie looked at him in shock. 

“The evidence suggests that. Whether or not the pregnancy went full term is something I can’t say with any certainty.”

“Thank you , doc.” 

“I hope your boyfriend gets better. We’re all rooting for him.” he said and walked off with a wave. 

Eddie looked after the short man as he retreated down the hall. He was relieved that he hadn’t lost a baby. Then again he was shocked that there was another baby out there somewhere. Possibly. It was for sure , but Eddie was thrown all the same. He continued to Buck’s room. 

“Hey.” the voice croaked from the bed. 

“Hey , baby.” Eddie moved to his side and kissed him. 

“You ok?” Buck looked at him , concerned. 

“I just got the results. She wasn’t pregnant. Not for two years at least.”

“Two years , you mean?” 

“He couldn’t say if it went to term or was a quick miscarrage but she was pregnant at least two years ago.” 

“What now?” 

“Now we work on you. You have to do this right or you could do more damage.” Eddie told him seriously. 

“I meant about her having another child possibly.” 

“I can ask Athena to look into it.” 

“Alright. Now tell me about this plan to get me back to work.” Buck sighed. 

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“You don’t need to come , I don’t want you to hurt yourself.” Eddie said as he helped Buck into his dress blues.

“I know that , but I’m not missing this for the world. Besides Christopher was so proud he taught me how to use crutches , I have to give everyone a demonstration of his teaching skills.” 

“Well , you’re going to lose this pair of pants. It won’t fit over the cast.” Eddie grimaced at the cast. 

“Do it.” Buck sighed.  

He was getting used to all these inconveniences.

They made it to the station. Eddie helping both Christopher and Buck out of the car and into the firehouse. They had cleared the trucks from the bay and set up tables. They were celebrating Eddie’s end of probation. He’d been there a year , no longer a rookie but now a permanent member of the crew. Buck looked over at the crowd , all the guys at the station , some higher ups and Eddie’s family. 

Including his parents. Buck swallowed uncomfortably. 

“Have a seat before you fall.” Eddie chided him. 

They sat at a table across from Eddie’s Abuela. Buck beside Christopher. Eddie had to go up to the front so Bobby could do his thing , giving him his permanent badge and making him one of them officially. Buck knew that Bobby had a surprise planned. 

“A year ago you came to us as recruit Diaz , a temporary member of this team. Today you shed that skin and become Firefighter Edmundo ‘Eddie’ Diaz , member of the 118 fire house and our family.” Bobby said. 

“Here to present you with your new permanent badge and helmet , the best of the best.” Bobby looked out and waited. 

Christopher got to his feet , the helmet Chim passed him in his hands. He balanced his arms on his canes and slowly made his way behind Buck to the center aisle and toward Eddie. Eddie felt his eyes tear up as his son walked toward him , a symbol of his dedication over the past year in his hands. He knelt and waited for Christopher to put the helmet on his head. 

Movement behind him caused him to look past Christopher as he pulled him in for a hug. Buck was getting unsteadily to his feet , not having as much practice as Christopher. He got them under him and steady , Maddie and Chim helping , before he started coming toward Eddie. He placed the medal over his head and kissed him. 

“Thank you.” Eddie whispered. 

“Eddie Diaz , you are now and forever a part of the 118 firehouse. Welcome to the family.” Bobby finished. 

Everyone broke out into applause , Buck smiling at him with that wide smile of his. Eddie was finally home , with a man he loved , friends he could count on and his son and family there to support him. It was one of the best days of his life. 

“I love you , you know.” Buck told him.

“I love you too. I can’t wait to get you back by my side , where you belong.” Eddie told him. 

“Eddie , I want to appologize for before. We didn’t see. This is where you belong and where your family is. We’ll make time to rebuild the relationship between us. All three of us.” Julio came up to them. 

“That means a lot , pop.” Eddie told him. 

“I’m sorry we were so rude. Start over?” he said as he extended a hand to Buck. 

Buck took the hand in his and shook it. He would help make sure that Eddie tried to repair his relationship with his parents. It was a long road ahead , with twists and turns he was sure and he had no idea how it was going to go. But he was sure of one thing , he was on the right one. 

All his twists and turns in his life up until this point had led him here. To the 118 , to his friends and to Eddie and Christopher. He was a firefighter , boyfriend and step son. His greatest achievements. He couldn’t wait to see what the future held. 

“Hey , you with me or far off?” Eddie asked , jerking him back to the here and now. 

“Yeah , even if I wasn’t , I was a million miles away , I’d run to you.” Buck smirked at him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there she is. Wrapped up at last. Hopefully I made no mistakes or continuity errors. I am so glad to have had you with me on this ride. It was a great one. Look for the Buddie fan page on facebook , and I have a novel on Amazon. Full Moon Painted Black by R.J. Kenyon. One last time COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT!


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